Venting I hate being told what to do.

[AprilsOrangeSpring]

I have plenty of valid reasons to consider CTB, but recovery is not impossible.

The one reason I just can't seem to recover, is that I keep feeling like I'm FORCED to stay alive.
I don't like being forced to do anything. Maybe it's stupid or maybe it's not. I think it might stem from childhood trauma.

Either way, what I know for sure is that, if there were a legal and safe way to CTB, I would probably recover faster.

Like, If I was told that I can do whatever I want with my life, even end it, whenever I want. That might be more helpful to me than all this stupid pro-life shit.

I've lived my whole life without any freedom. Controlled by my family, Controlled by my country's dumbass dictatorship, Controlled by my fear.

I just want freedom, and If I can't even choose what to do with MY OWN LIFE! How could I ever feel truly free?

It's just so frustrating.

 

[FERAL_FRENZY]

Yeah, having pro-life bullshit shoved down your throat the second you even IMPLY that you wanna ctb isn't fun at all. I know some people think that they're "doing a good deed" and all but I feel like it just boxes you into a corner so that your suffering is more digestible for them to deal with. They don't realize that most of us already feel like we have no say in the tragic events that occur in our lives and stripping us of a way to peacefully exit (forcing our hand) just isn't the way to go.