Venting I got a job but idk how to feel

[Housefly]

So I got the call. I start Monday. Hung up and put my music back on as though nothing happened in the passed minute. Remembered a few hours later and I tell a friend to gauge what the emotion should be. I got Congratulations!!! And that's when the stress set in. I have to do shit now. I can barely get out of bed, I haven't showered in days, haven't left my bed in days, my sleep is horrendous. I feel stress/anxiety that I don't feel positive feelings at all about it. I never wanted any of this but it's all laid out in front of me. I'm taking my stuff on time and I'm going to see the peoples but my baseline is that I never cared for any of these things. Yet when I'm NEET I also still hate everything but I use less energy to do that by laying down in the dark in fetal position. I'm so tired already for all the making I have to do. Wish me luck that I get hit by a car or something. Night

 

[cami]

hey. it's okay to feel like that. you don't have to be happy. take your time. and take care of yourself however you can.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand why you would feel dread at what lies ahead, existing here truly is so dreadful and at least to me there could never be any real relief from suffering as long as one is trapped here.