I think you've inherited the same distorted view of reality of many misguided feminists you see online.
You should feel no fault for being born as a biological male. That is a non-problem.
I empathize with you but your "guilt" by being part of the gender that "kills, rapes, etc." is nonsensical and based on a very superficial view of history.
While it is true that many western societies were patriarchal and men occupied positions of power in regards to women that in no way says something about all men being evil or what not. I assure you that women, were they in a similar role (if they were inverted) would be well capable of doing the same towards men. Those who deny that are in my opinion profoundly misguided and not in sync with reality. The issue is power, not gender.
The problem is not being a man or woman, but power and how it organizes society. Power does not care about gender on a fundamental level, but it relates to gender in the way it organizes society, with one gender being more oppressed by the other for various reasons across history. Women are very capable of supporting oppressive structures, just like many do today. Women are no saints, just like men aren't. The world is nuanced and morally complex. Women are completely capable of killing, raping, mudering, being racist, supporting political systems that oppress others etc.
The reason why men commit the most (physical) violence has a lot to do with the way power has been organized in patriarchal societies. For a long time men were viewed as biologically stronger and tougher than the women, such that they were to physically dominate their wives and occupy positions of power and of military matters. Women are the oppressed gender historically and even today, but that is very nuanced as the patriarchy also harms men as well. There is a mould for what is a woman and what is a man, and both can fail at fitting that. There is also the issue of these gender roles being bigger than the biological genitalia, like we see with the whole trans-women-feminism discussion.
Nowadays with more gender equality you can see so clearly how many women in positions of power support harmful ideologies and cause harm. I can think of many female politicians right now that do the same.
While it is true that the patriarchy exists and women are the oppressed gender (with nuance), it is important to understand that the patriarchy harms both men and women in their own ways. It is not about gender fundamentally, but power, and no one is at fault for the gender they were born with. You should answer for your own actions and the historical responsibility that the conditions you were born in entail, not some imaginary collective guilt all men are supposed to inherit the moment they were born, as if it were an ancient debt.
In short, I think you are completely and profoundly misguided in your guilt, as sincere and well-intentioned as it may be. I think your post illustrates a lot of the reasons why feminism seems to be "failing" and "losing" young men in these days and age.
Sometimes being a good feminist (an "ally") is knowing when to call out nonsense, regardless if you are a man and the person you are calling out is a woman. I hope you can improve and realize your guilt is unfounded and misplaced. You should hate the system for oppressing women (and men), not yourself.
thats so fucking dumb
Women aren't angels and treating them like they are is pretty pathetic. She's not gonna see this man.
Yeah... I could put it like that. But I made a long text arguing my view on how patriarchal societies generate violence and how that isn't intrinsic to the male gender.
