I conferred to my psychiatrist that I tried to kill myself by overdosing on antipsychotics. I regret telling him though. I was able to see the desperation in his eyes. He wants to help me, and I know that, but I wasn't ready to meet him halfway. It crushes me when I consider his feelings, and I can't understand why I care. We don't even know each other. But I know what it's like to fail someone (I've done it many times), and it saddens me that he feels that way.
My psychiatrist pleaded with me to let him refer me to a therapist. He even picked up the phone, ready to make an appointment with a therapist, and told me I could cancel any time. I said no. I wasn't ready, but I'll make things right on our next appointment. Hopefully, it will alleviate some of his worry over me.