Venting I feel alive only when drunk

[obei]

Is this normal? Or is this a sign?
I mean, I do feel like I should ctb when not drunk.
I feel like I only feel okay when Im drunk.
Like I can only be fine with my life and deal with my problems when im drunk.

 

[Old Friend]

Being drunk helps put a soft blanket over my problems too. I don't want to end up an alcoholic but I can see how people fall into the arms of that warm embrace.

 

[DrPepper709]

I feel the same way with coffee. I only feel alive when I am on high doses of caffeine, so I guess it's the depression being masked; it's making you happier. It's only bad if it becomes a crutch. Ask anyone else, and they'd say we're addicted, but I feel like if it helps it helps as long as you can control it

 

[DesperateOne]

Welcome to the club.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

I'm the same way. When I'm plastered, I feel more content with myself. The only problem I have is, I think I'm going to need to be drunk when it's time to ctb. Tried it sober the last time, and don't know how it'll work this time if I try it again sober.

 

[BeautyWSaveTheWorld]

Oh my God, this is so reletable! A few weeks ago had one of the most relieving moments in my life with one of my good friends while drunk. He broke up with his gf recently and I had some fucked up problems of my own, so sitting down at a bar where my other friend worked at the time and being so open to each other helped me GREATLY. Probably one of the bigget reasons I'm still here. Later we had the time of our lives at my home with my parents. Tomorrow day we had another drunken night where we opened to each other EVEN MORE. And believe me, I'm not new to alchohol, and I know what a good party is. But opening to someone like that was one of the most liberating feelings I EVER had. At that time I drank regularly and to be honest, I had a bit of a problem quitting that lifestyle when school arrived, but I would forever be thankful that I got to expereince something like that. I wish I could recreate it somehow, but I don't think it's possible, not anytime soon, as I think that friend still has to open up a bit more to us being able to develop even closer relationship. It looks like he's really afraid of truly opening up, even though it was possible to him those few weeks prior.
But yeah, drink responsibly, as doing so too much WILL ruin it's effects and WILL cause you more problems like addiction. Believe me, I know this.

 

[Abyssal]

I don't drink often but last time I did I told the SaSu chat that I felt like living. Now it sounds like a lie but I think I really felt that way.