I envy those who killed themselves

[Crematoryy]

Because they no longer exist, they no longer feel, they no longer witness. The absence of that which tormented them so much has been achieved. For a meaningless life, abstinence is a blessing. This world, composed of materiality, which many cherish and want to maintain to foster ego and dominance, has no relevance whatsoever to those who are gone —it has all been reduced to dust. Although I'm uncomfortable with the idea of "abandoning existence and leaving it to the scoundrels," the selflessness of it is almost dreamlike.

 

[SomewhatLoved]

I feel the same. There's always been something stopping me, but it feels like never anything that has made life worth living. A lot of the time I wish there wasn't something stopping me.