Venting i dont want to hurt others

[UltraRareSlinky]

whenever i think about my loved ones reactions, especially my little sister i get very hesitant. i can picture exactly the way she would cry and i never want to cause her pain. when i posted about this on suicidewatch subreddit people told me its because i dont want to leave for real since i care about what will happen after. does it make my urges any less valid that i dont want to cause suffering or feel bad about it? when asking for ideas on how to spend my last days, i got replies like "kill somebody" and other bad things and got the same reaction. apparently im not suicidal since i wouldnt kill another person. this made me feel extremely invalidated. id never want to hurt anybody but i still want to die

 

[inaminute]

whenever i think about my loved ones reactions, especially my little sister i get very hesitant. i can picture exactly the way she would cry and i never want to cause her pain. when i posted about this on suicidewatch subreddit people told me its because i dont want to leave for real since i care about what will happen after. does it make my urges any less valid that i dont want to cause suffering or feel bad about it? when asking for ideas on how to spend my last days, i got replies like "kill somebody" and other bad things and got the same reaction. apparently im not suicidal since i wouldnt kill another person. this made me feel extremely invalidated. id never want to hurt anybody but i still want to die

I never want to hurt anybody but my mental illness causes hurt. I earned my mental problems due to years of childhood sexual abuse and that's when I would break my vow not to hurt anyone physically. In fact I went to look for him this last weekend to kill him then myself

 

[UltraRareSlinky]

I never want to hurt anybody but my mental illness causes hurt. I earned my mental problems due to years of childhood sexual abuse and that's when I would break my vow not to hurt anyone physically. In fact I went to look for him this last weekend to kill him then myself

you are very brave. you never deserved the abuse and he needs to suffer for it. im so sorry you had to go through that. i hope by doing what you want youll find peace

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Don't listen to those assholes. I've went through that subreddit before and it's basically just one big "who has it worse/is more suicidal competition". This isn't the first time I've someone on here talk about having a bad experience with them. Worrying about how your suicide will impact those you care about is normal and doesn't make your urges any less valid. It just means that you have people in your life who care about you and you also happen to care about them. That's it. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Most suicidal people aren't murderous abusive heathens, ready to kill harm anyone in sight prior to ctbing. I think they are just trying to mess with you. Don't bother with them. They are just trying to invalidate your feelings in order to cope with and validate their own feelings. I'd just avoid that subreddit if I were you.

 

[eLdus]

whenever i think about my loved ones reactions, especially my little sister i get very hesitant. i can picture exactly the way she would cry and i never want to cause her pain. when i posted about this on suicidewatch subreddit people told me its because i dont want to leave for real since i care about what will happen after. does it make my urges any less valid that i dont want to cause suffering or feel bad about it? when asking for ideas on how to spend my last days, i got replies like "kill somebody" and other bad things and got the same reaction. apparently im not suicidal since i wouldnt kill another person. this made me feel extremely invalidated. id never want to hurt anybody but i still want to die

I agree with you, and feel the same in regards to my own family. Loving your sister and caring about how she feels, doesn't mean you're not genuinely suicidal. You can experience both things at the same time.

 

[FuneralCry]

Honestly the people on that other site sound like they are trolling, I wouldn't recommened being open about your suffering on there. And the way you feel is understandable, one can want to end their own existence and still struggle with the thought of leaving others behind. I know there are many who struggle with that, it's cruel how some humans are so insensitive and just invalidate suffering.

 

[UltraRareSlinky]

Don't listen to those assholes. I've went through that subreddit before and it's basically just one big "who has it worse/is more suicidal competition". This isn't the first time I've someone on here talk about having a bad experience with them. Worrying about how your suicide will impact those you care about is normal and doesn't make your urges any less valid. It just means that you have people in your life who care about you and you also happen to care about them. That's it. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Most suicidal people aren't murderous abusive heathens, ready to kill harm anyone in sight prior to ctbing. I think they are just trying to mess with you. Don't bother with them. They are just trying to invalidate your feelings in order to cope with and validate their own feelings. I'd just avoid that subreddit if I were you.

thank you. this made me feel better and less confused. i avoid that place at all costs

Honestly the people on that other site sound like they are trolling, I wouldn't recommened being open about your suffering on there. And the way you feel is understandable, one can want to end their own existence and still struggle with the thought of leaving others behind. I know there are many who struggle with that, it's cruel how some humans are so insensitive and just invalidate suffering.

back then i didnt know about this site (i found out like 3 days ago lol) and i just wanted to be understood desperately, but it turned out it was a horrible place for me to open up. im glad here people are kind and understanding

 

[UKscotty]

I'd leave the reddit and 4chan suicide groups alone.

A lot of the people there are the toxic all life sucks type of person or people who encourage others to CTB whilst not doing so themselves.

 

[UltraRareSlinky]

I'd leave the reddit and 4chan suicide groups alone.

A lot of the people there are the toxic all life sucks type of person or people who encourage others to CTB whilst not doing so themselves.

that and the others preaching toxic positivity