Venting I don't want to get close to anyone anymore.

[Burdenphilic]

I'm a very sentimental person and I value my connections and friends a lot, I get attached to people quite easily and I can get very close to them. However, everyone I've ever gotten close to has been getting distant from me, whether it's cutting me off entirely or by diminishing my presence in their lives, I'm sick of getting heartbroken the same way again every single time. I don't want to get close to anyone anymore, I can't trust people to stay in my life, I can't live for myself because I don't value my own presence in my own life in contrast to how I value other people's presence in my life, I've accepted that nobody really wants to be around me for a long period of time for some whatever reason and have decided to just accept it and move on. I know I may seem dramatic or perhaps overthinking and I understand if I come off this way but I'm just tired of setting up unfulfilled expectations for people.
I had a friend who told me I was the best person they had ever met for 6 whole years, and I was there for them when they needed someone most, and I cared for them a lot, then they just cut me off and vanished one day from my life and stopped talking to me, the same goes with all the friends I made from school when I used to be a student, I'm sick of getting close to people then having them leave like it's no big deal. I wish I could just stop existing so that I could stop relying on others for validation and value.

 

[violetforever]

i relate to this so much. this is exactly how i feel. just yesterday i was thinking about how uncertain friendships really seem to be. all the friends i used to have and now i only have a singular friend. i guess i can be unreliable too because i isolate myself when i'm really depressed so nobody wants to deal with that. nobody ever seems to care or need me as much as i care and need them.

 

[lawlietsph]

huuuu i can relate to this so much... i always love them more, i'm the one who's attached. for them, i'm just a temporary thing, someone to reach out to when they feel like they need an ego boost. i'm sick of being heartbroken and used

 

[SASU-KE]

I have only 2 friends,one IRL and 1 online.I love them both unconditionally. My IRL friend is someone I grew up with. My online friend is going through great difficulty at this time and is a bit detached these days , but I don't blame her for it.She has trouble forming connections. Again, that's not her fault, that's just how she's wired.

She has had a very difficult life and I'll be there for her either way.

I say if you really love someone, be there for them regardless.No expectations.

 

[kitkatt]

I'm a very sentimental person and I value my connections and friends a lot, I get attached to people quite easily and I can get very close to them. However, everyone I've ever gotten close to has been getting distant from me, whether it's cutting me off entirely or by diminishing my presence in their lives, I'm sick of getting heartbroken the same way again every single time. I don't want to get close to anyone anymore, I can't trust people to stay in my life, I can't live for myself because I don't value my own presence in my own life in contrast to how I value other people's presence in my life, I've accepted that nobody really wants to be around me for a long period of time for some whatever reason and have decided to just accept it and move on. I know I may seem dramatic or perhaps overthinking and I understand if I come off this way but I'm just tired of setting up unfulfilled expectations for people.
I had a friend who told me I was the best person they had ever met for 6 whole years, and I was there for them when they needed someone most, and I cared for them a lot, then they just cut me off and vanished one day from my life and stopped talking to me, the same goes with all the friends I made from school when I used to be a student, I'm sick of getting close to people then having them leave like it's no big deal. I wish I could just stop existing so that I could stop relying on others for validation and value.

Fuck I relate. That's why I want a partner so bad but nobody ends up being forever :( I know friends don't always have time for me and sometimes they may leave due to their own lives. But I feel like if someone could love me how I'd love them I'd change my mind about wanting to exist but time and time again I'm proven wrong I'm tired of not having someone for me. Also the dating pool has pee and poop in it no one has any moral or even tries to be empathetic and emotionally intelligent. I hate that I feel so hard in a world full of meaningless connections :( I'll still always love them in every capacity because I can't stop I'll continue to be the good I so desperately wanna see in the world until I'm not here anymore