Venting I don't want to de, but I don't want live the way that I am

[ragebaby]

Title sums it up pretty well. I don't want to die, I would just rather die than live in the suffering I have for the last 15 years. I've exhausted all my resources, I'm in crippling debt just to pay my rent and keep food in the kitchen and the lights on. I've exhausted my credit limit, I am terrible with financials, I can't save money, and feel stuck in this loop. Today, my rent is due and I'm a good $300 short. I still cant decide whether I allow myself to become homeless again, or if its finally time for me to catch the bus. Although the only method I have available to me, is one I don't want to do. I can't bring myself to shoot myself, scared of missing and leaving myself more worthless than I already am.
To all my fellow gun owners, would you think that 9mm hollows could do the job?

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm sorry you have to go through that. Life is often so unfair. I hope you can find peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

That must be really tiring and dreadful what you go through, it's cruel how people have to suffer so much in this existence. But anyway best wishes.

 

[Kalabrese]

I am in the exactly same situation and it is just simply horrible , finding a job at this point is exhausting. Think about tomorrow freeze my brain. Fridge is empty and the debt continues increasing. Here in Spain is even impossible to get a g*n. I'm clinging to spirituality as a last resource so I wish you the best of my last vibes that you can achieve your purpose

 

[ragebaby]

I am in the exactly same situation and it is just simply horrible , finding a job at this point is exhausting. Think about tomorrow freeze my brain. Fridge is empty and the debt continues increasing. Here in Spain is even impossible to get a g*n. I'm clinging to spirituality as a last resource so I wish you the best of my last vibes that you can achieve your purpose

Throwing myself into crippling debt just to survive in the present, effectively screwing up my future. Gotta love the American dream. I apologize you have to go through this as well

 

[Kalabrese]

Throwing myself into crippling debt just to survive in the present, effectively screwing up my future. Gotta love the American dream. I apologize you have to go through this as well

The World is copying the american dream for all the countries. Is not our fault. It was never our fault, the fault is from the System. We are good people living mad shit. I'm here wishing you the best, Im in arrested development for trying to steal food to survive. What an incoherence, 450€/month and I'm late for two now (and this is 'cheap' rn omg what a nonsense). I hope we can survive or die peacefully. Fucking system of crap, it was never our fault. NEVER. Is their fault. I will die knowing the truth.

 

[venin.n]

Title sums it up pretty well. I don't want to die, I would just rather die than live in the suffering I have for the last 15 years. I've exhausted all my resources, I'm in crippling debt just to pay my rent and keep food in the kitchen and the lights on. I've exhausted my credit limit, I am terrible with financials, I can't save money, and feel stuck in this loop. Today, my rent is due and I'm a good $300 short. I still cant decide whether I allow myself to become homeless again, or if its finally time for me to catch the bus. Although the only method I have available to me, is one I don't want to do. I can't bring myself to shoot myself, scared of missing and leaving myself more worthless than I already am.
To all my fellow gun owners, would you think that 9mm hollows could do the job?

I am exactly in the situation stated in the title