Venting i don’t know how long i can keep going with no friends

[snailboy]

i feel like if i had a few decent friends/social circle i could actually be kind of happy. but i have quite literally no one except two "friends" who can barely even text me back and flake on our plans.

i just don't know what's so wrong with me that no one cares about me the same way i care about them. i'm sick of putting my whole heart into friendships only to leave basically traumatized because they don't give a shit about me. i just keep letting myself get walked all over because i don't want to be alone, but having a shitty friend is basically the same as being alone.

i literally talk to myself when im alone, its so depressing. i don't have anyone to share anything with, even my mom acts annoyed when i call her too frequently. probably the only people that would care if i was gone are my parents and sister and thats just sad.

 

[Ambivalent1]

Metoo

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

Good friends are hard to come by. 1 or 2 quality friends is much better than 20 or 30 fakes. But even the goodest of friends will want to seek value in any friendships they have. It's a sad truth, but it's the truth. You may have to take a hard look at yourself and decide if you truly offer anything of value. If not, you may need to figure out how you can. Because friendships require time, and time is money.

Loneliness has become my preference. I have many opportunities to roam around in a big social circle, but choose not to. Because dealing with people is exhausting. As an autistic, I'm tired of worrying how to act. If I'm going to accidentally say something stupid or offensive, etc. Talking with everyone here provides me with enough quality, judgemnt-free social interaction.

 

[snailboy]

Good friends are hard to come by. 1 or 2 quality friends is much better than 20 or 30 fakes. But even the goodest of friends will want to seek value in any friendships they have. It's a sad truth, but it's the truth. You may have to take a hard look at yourself and decide if you truly offer anything of value. If not, you may need to figure out how you can. Because friendships require time, and time is money.

Loneliness has become my preference. I have many opportunities to roam around in a big social circle, but choose not to. Because dealing with people is exhausting. As an autistic, I'm tired of worrying how to act. If I'm going to accidentally say something stupid or offensive, etc. Talking with everyone here provides me with enough quality, judgemnt-free social interaction.

i put tons of time into my friendships but i get nothing in return. i check in on them, let them vent to me, pay for their food/tickets to events/etc, drive them places, plan get-togethers, etc. not sure what else i could offer.

i have been completely friendless and lonely for almost a year now. it makes me want to die.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

i put tons of time into my friendships but i get nothing in return. i check in on them, let them vent to me, pay for their food/tickets to events/etc, drive them places, plan get-togethers, etc. not sure what else i could offer.

i have been completely friendless and lonely for almost a year now. it makes me want to die.

Then you're just simply surrounded by unworthy people. Good friends are not easy to find. Hang in there.

 

[ferrie]

Idk if commiserating makes it any less lonely, but I think a lot of people here lack close friendships. You're not alone in that. Any time I've been suicidal, it's because of just being overwhelmingly lonely. I lost the closest relationships I've ever had in February, and now I've lost the last friends I had in the past few weeks due to me being suicidal & it's definitely put me at an all time low. What's helped me recover before though has been putting myself into an entirely new social scene. It's hard to maintain good relationships, especially when you feel like you're the only one putting in effort, but I think having people that care can potentially make life worth living. Just really depends on where you feel like you're at in life

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

i put tons of time into my friendships but i get nothing in return. i check in on them, let them vent to me, pay for their food/tickets to events/etc, drive them places, plan get-togethers, etc. not sure what else i could offer.

i have been completely friendless and lonely for almost a year now. it makes me want to die.

Same, friend. I stopped reaching out to the three people who I thought got me. I haven't heard from any of them in 6 months. That tells me everything.

I think about if they will even notice. I plan to delete all my social media right before. I'm dead to them already, so if they reach out they can know it's too late. I would love it if they could get a message 'x is no longer here and gave up hope. You're too late'. I don't want people to suffer but I want them to think through the impact.

We're in such a disposal society. Some of us - like the neurodivergent - don't stand a chance to survive. Ah well, the circle of lifeeeeeee

 

[locked*n*loaded]

i feel like if i had a few decent friends/social circle i could actually be kind of happy. but i have quite literally no one except two "friends" who can barely even text me back and flake on our plans.

i just don't know what's so wrong with me that no one cares about me the same way i care about them. i'm sick of putting my whole heart into friendships only to leave basically traumatized because they don't give a shit about me. i just keep letting myself get walked all over because i don't want to be alone, but having a shitty friend is basically the same as being alone.

i literally talk to myself when im alone, its so depressing. i don't have anyone to share anything with, even my mom acts annoyed when i call her too frequently. probably the only people that would care if i was gone are my parents and sister and thats just sad.

I have literally no friends, and really haven't for decades. But, I don't plan on continuing on too much longer. Honestly, for me, it wouldn't even make a difference if I did have friends at this point, as there are just too many other reasons to not stick around.

 

[snailboy]

Same, friend. I stopped reaching out to the three people who I thought got me. I haven't heard from any of them in 6 months. That tells me everything.

I think about if they will even notice. I plan to delete all my social media right before. I'm dead to them already, so if they reach out they can know it's too late. I would love it if they could get a message 'x is no longer here and gave up hope. You're too late'. I don't want people to suffer but I want them to think through the impact.

We're in such a disposal society. Some of us - like the neurodivergent - don't stand a chance to survive. Ah well, the circle of lifeeeeeee

i just deactivated my instagram and idk if im gonna do anything tonight but i just wish someone would notice im suffering. idgaf if people think its for attention because in a way it is, everyone needs attention and i haven't had anyone give a fuck about me for a while and it hurts

 

[steppenwolf]

Friends are no good to you. You need to be self-reliant. You can have lots of friends and still feel like the loneliest person in the world if you're not self-reliant. And everyone talks to themselves. And having no one to share anything with is far better than not having anything to share with anyone. You can learn self-reliance by yourself whilst you're hurting. It takes about an hour.

 

[snailboy]

Friends are no good to you. You need to be self-reliant. You can have lots of friends and still feel like the loneliest person in the world if you're not self-reliant. And everyone talks to themselves. And having no one to share anything with is far better than not having anything to share with anyone. You can learn self-reliance by yourself whilst you're hurting. It takes about an hour.

thanks dude that totally makes me feel better! you do know social interaction is a basic human need right? lmao

 

[steppenwolf]

thanks dude that totally makes me feel better! you do know social interaction is a basic human need right? lmao

No it isn't. Self-respect is a basic human need. Young people commit suicide every day because they had no self-respect, and thought they needed social interaction with people who only turned out to be cruel and indifferent to them. You get walked all over because you're immature and have no respect for anybody, not even for people with issues of their own which you know nothing of, trying to help you on the suicide discussion forum you came crying to because no one would change your nappy for you. You didn't come here because you needed help, you came here because you needed to take the piss out of someone worse off than yourself. No one needs social interaction with people who take the piss out of them.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

You get walked all over because you're immature and have no respect for anybody, not even for people with issues of their own which you know nothing of, trying to help you on the suicide discussion forum you came crying to because no one would change your nappy for you

Alright, I'm gonna go off on a limb here and say something. All the OP did was make a point about how they lack real friends in life and how that could make a difference to them, something many here I'm sure can relate but that in no way gave you the right to make assumptions about them, what happened to being able to having a discussion without resorting to insults like about why someone came "crying" to this forum because no one would change their nappy, please refrain from this.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I relate to this. I personally have never had a friend. I've been so alone to where I would genuinely consider it as a blessing if I did have the two "friends" that you had - I didn't even have that in life. This isn't to say that your suffering is any less than mine because it isn't... I'm just trying to put my loneliness into perspective which is hard to do accurately because people always think I'm being hyperbolic and they just can't understand the true magnitude of it. I am hoping that I become a schizoid and that I wouldn't have to rely on the idea of friendships but I know that, deep down, some part of me craves friendship. I feel like friendships makes life significantly easier to navigate. Without friends, life is on hard mode. This world can be navigated alone but it's extremely hard to do so

 

[snailboy]

No it isn't. Self-respect is a basic human need. Young people commit suicide every day because they had no self-respect, and thought they needed social interaction with people who only turned out to be cruel and indifferent to them. You get walked all over because you're immature and have no respect for anybody, not even for people with issues of their own which you know nothing of, trying to help you on the suicide discussion forum you came crying to because no one would change your nappy for you. You didn't come here because you needed help, you came here because you needed to take the piss out of someone worse off than yourself. No one needs social interaction with people who take the piss out of them.

what the fuck is wrong with you, do
you come to a suicide forum just to tell people they're whining?? sorry my issues aren't bad enough for you, you also don't know my life or what i'm dealing with

Alright, I'm gonna go off on a limb here and say something. All the OP did was make a point about how they lack real friends in life and how that could make a difference to them, something many here I'm sure can relate but that in no way gave you the right to make assumptions about them, what happened to being able to having a discussion without resorting to insults like about why someone came "crying" to this forum because no one would change their nappy, please refrain from this.

kinda thought this forum was a more supportive place but ig not

I relate to this. I personally have never had a friend. I've been so alone to where I would genuinely consider it as a blessing if I did have the two "friends" that you had - I didn't even have that in life. This isn't to say that your suffering is any less than mine because it isn't... I'm just trying to put my loneliness into perspective which is hard to do accurately because people always think I'm being hyperbolic and they just can't understand the true magnitude of it. I am hoping that I become a schizoid and that I wouldn't have to rely on the idea of friendships but I know that, deep down, some part of me craves friendship. I feel like friendships makes life significantly easier to navigate. Without friends, life is on hard mode. This world can be navigated alone but it's extremely hard to do so

thank you, the last bit of your reply is exactly the point i was trying to make

 

[Linda]

i feel like if i had a few decent friends/social circle i could actually be kind of happy. but i have quite literally no one except two "friends" who can barely even text me back and flake on our plans.

i just don't know what's so wrong with me that no one cares about me the same way i care about them. i'm sick of putting my whole heart into friendships only to leave basically traumatized because they don't give a shit about me. i just keep letting myself get walked all over because i don't want to be alone, but having a shitty friend is basically the same as being alone.

i literally talk to myself when im alone, its so depressing. i don't have anyone to share anything with, even my mom acts annoyed when i call her too frequently. probably the only people that would care if i was gone are my parents and sister and thats just sad.

I suggest you get out to situations where you meet a lot of people. (They need to be the kind of people you will have at least somethig in common with.) The world won't come to you. Then let events take their course. What usually happens is that you get to know a fair number of people moderately well, even if they are not close friends, and a few who do become friends. But even the former are nice to have.

 

[DeIetedUser4739]

Maybe you could join the discord server or post in the friends megathread to make some friends?

 

[GalacticGardener]

Have you tried having conversations with chatbots like Pi, Claude or ChatGPT? It may sound silly at first, but nowadays you can actually have pretty rich discussions and really feel understood. Some people use it as a psychiatrist, and in Asia a lot of people have emotional bonds with chatbots and don't see anything wrong with it. It's safer and potentially healthier than "real" relationships.