Venting i dont feel safe

[maneose]

i guess i've been in a runt lately, i just relapsed and i feel so unsafe. for a while i felt like my ex had access to my reddit account and i was finally proven right when i saw them posting about my response in the abusive relationships sub. even if it seems hypocritical since i have their twitter and lurk on it sometimes, knowing that they have access to almost all my online social media that i tried my best to hide from them makes me so terrified. i don't feel safe going to my classes and honestly if i could i would do all online classes and become a hermit or something. i don't like the idea of them seeing the types of conversations i have with my friends online...i want to private my account but i'm currently selling things so it would just void the entire point. tbh i'm not too sure what im scared of? i guess them doxxing me and sending people to harrass me? they already leaked my phone number to some random girl on the internet once. i guess also the fear they might attack me or lie about me so someone attacks me. don't know but just needed to write this