Venting I despise family meetings

[Claymore7274]

Father's day is just around the corner, and with it, another forced meeting with my family, we've always been dysfunctional, but we still pretend we like eachother, you can practically taste the tension in the air, and i'm in the hurricane's eye, words hurt more than punches for sure.

I have to pretend i'm comfortable and happy around my father and brother's, that i'm actually attending my classes, that my mother is not drinking anymore, that i'm not on the verge of killing myself anyday.

I am geniunely so tired, i can't cry, i can't free myself from this, resorted to self harm in a fit of desperation a few minutes ago.

 

[SASU-KE]

How long will it last?
Dysfunctional is at least 90% of families. Just act your *** off. Be polite. Just resolve yourself and get through. I'm very introverted and I don't like being around family and friends(crowds) for a long time.Don't talk about the bad stuff and try not to think about it for your own sake and sanity.Sending hugs.

 

[Claymore7274]

How long will it last?
Dysfunctional is at least 90% of families. Just act your *** off. Be polite. Just resolve yourself and get through. I'm very introverted and I don't like being around family and friends(crowds) for a long time.Don't talk about the bad stuff and try not to think about it for your own sake and sanity.Sending hugs.

Just a few hours i guess, although my oldest brother is coming to visit for the weekend, he takes my room and i have to sleep somewhere else, every few months this happens and each time he berates me about something different each time, as if i was a little kid, i can't win with him, he's very abusive and has a lot of power in the family dynamic. since he's the only one who has actually succeeded in life.

 

[iwkmsssb]

i can imagine how exhausting this feels, having to fake everything just to keep the peace.
i envy people who have healthy and comforting families. bide your time, i hope one day you'll be able to get away from them and live your own life. wishing you the best.

 

[Dandelion's]

Father's day is just around the corner, and with it, another forced meeting with my family, we've always been dysfunctional, but we still pretend we like eachother, you can practically taste the tension in the air, and i'm in the hurricane's eye, words hurt more than punches for sure.

I have to pretend i'm comfortable and happy around my father and brother's, that i'm actually attending my classes, that my mother is not drinking anymore, that i'm not on the verge of killing myself anyday.

I am geniunely so tired, i can't cry, i can't free myself from this, resorted to self harm in a fit of desperation a few minutes ago.

I hate it too I've become a laughing stock to my extended family, I hate my birthdays tbh I have to just sit there and listen to my family call me stupid for being sensitive, while trying my hardest not to tear up. I feel like a jerk for always throwing a quote on quote fit before my birthdays refusing to even attend but honestly I feel justified to do so.