Venting I caved

[Toy]

I texted my abuser on a whim last night thinking that I would be okay being friends with them again but now, I really don't know what will happen to me and I'm petrified of how they're going to respond. I want to forgive them, I always end up wanting to go back to people who hurt me and now that I caved, I can't go back so I have to tough it out and wait for if they even reply. Feeling like CTB on the spot, I really don't know what to even do now. I'm terrified that they'll attack me or hurt me somehow just for reaching out and wanting to be friends with them. I don't want to say I regret reaching out because I miss the kind of friendship me and them had but I feel like this won't end well. FML

 

[xXAJBXx]

I don't have much experience in this area of things. I feel it worth putting my two cents in.

Idk what type of abuse/abuser you faced. Nor do I want you to feel compelled to say. But if it is what I feel it to be. Giving a chance for them to improve is always a bold step.

Keep them accountable. In the unfortunate event they attack you again, The last thing you want to do is beat yourself up for thinking they changed. Put it on them for not changing. If they truly have changed for the better, be sure to let them know you recognize their change and are appreciative/ proud of it.

The anxiety might be there. But ultimately they're gonna text back. Take a deep breath in through the nose. Breath out slowly through the mouth as you open it.

Best of wishes, hope it all goes well.

 

[nessun_nome]

I texted my abuser on a whim last night thinking that I would be okay being friends with them again but now, I really don't know what will happen to me and I'm petrified of how they're going to respond. I want to forgive them, I always end up wanting to go back to people who hurt me and now that I caved, I can't go back so I have to tough it out and wait for if they even reply. Feeling like CTB on the spot, I really don't know what to even do now. I'm terrified that they'll attack me or hurt me somehow just for reaching out and wanting to be friends with them. I don't want to say I regret reaching out because I miss the kind of friendship me and them had but I feel like this won't end well. FML

what sort of attack do you fear? Physical or verbal?

If you are afraid of their answer you can block their number so it doesn't come through. If you don't want that, you can read it at a time of your choosing.

Good luck. I've been there. DM me if you want to chat about it.

 

[Toy]

what sort of attack do you fear? Physical or verbal?

If you are afraid of their answer you can block their number so it doesn't come through. If you don't want that, you can read it at a time of your choosing.

Good luck. I've been there. DM me if you want to chat about it.

Verbal, however they have mentioned physically attacking before, as in committing murder and threatening that they know how to cover up that type of stuff. I'm scared to block them. I'm aware that they've seen my message but haven't responded yet, I don't know what they'll do if I suddenly block them since I feel like I'm already in danger by even sending that I wanted to be friends. I don't want to make another wrong move and make it worse.