I can’t do it anymore

[goodoldnoname923]

My mental health is just declining further and further and i'm not recoverable,for years my mental health as declinded i've become increasingly more miserable and toxic.

My shitty behaviours and attitudes have become more unbareable my mood and ability to feel joy has worsened

And I genuinely only feel the guilt and suffering and pain is going to make me feel worse and worse until i finally snap and really do something wrong

I can't do this anymore I can't live anymore i'm not recoverable like people tell me i am i need to die


I've tried CO and its failed with the shitty tent and i'm afraid the malwai still may fail for various reasons

I've tried slitting my throat but i just can't find the strength and the friend that said would (understandably) is getting cold feet about the whole thing

I tried contacting an old American contact to shoot me in the head and thats not easy to come by

I can't get F because it only ships to the states and I can't find anyone who would be trusted or willing to redirect to me

I can't exactly get N either because i need to go to peru or somewhere

Idk what else to do i really dk what else to do I'm trying I'm really trying but i'm exhuasting my options