I can’t disconnect from the guilt of leaving loved ones behind

[Oathkeeper]

It fucking sucks. I want to go so, so badly, but I don't want to hurt the people I care about. Their love for me just isn't enough to satiate my soul in light of everything that has happened to me.

I wish it was easier to detach from the fact that no matter what I do, I'll be hurting other people. Typical, really. It's all I've ever been good at.

 

[Ligottian]

I've said this before here. I took a private vow not to CTB before both my parents had died. The last one died seven years ago. I have no children, spouse, or partner. Good to go.

 

[Oathkeeper]

I've said this before here. I took a private vow not to CTB before both my parents had died. The last one died seven years ago. I have no children, spouse, or partner. Good to go.

What's kept you going for the past 7 years?

 

[Ligottian]

What's kept you going for the past 7 years?

Ha ha. Just hasn't got unbearable enough I suppose

 

[LilyLaroux2000]

It fucking sucks. I want to go so, so badly, but I don't want to hurt the people I care about. Their love for me just isn't enough to satiate my soul in light of everything that has happened to me.

I wish it was easier to detach from the fact that no matter what I do, I'll be hurting other people. Typical, really. It's all I've ever been good at.

I have the same problem but when something bad happens I no longer care. Like when my partner broke up with me I tryed to hang myself but I was found.

 

[darkenmydoorstep]

It fucking sucks. I want to go so, so badly, but I don't want to hurt the people I care about. Their love for me just isn't enough to satiate my soul in light of everything that has happened to me.

I wish it was easier to detach from the fact that no matter what I do, I'll be hurting other people. Typical, really. It's all I've ever been good at.

Whilst true I just think well, if it wasn't this they'd have some other shit to deal with. Such is the nature of life.

 

[ImTelling]

I think they would really hate me after I do it. They won't be sad, just angry that I did it. That I wasn't normal, that I lied to them about having my shit together. I'm planning on isolating until I do it so they won't be entirely hurt by it.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

That's the only reason I've been on this site for so long. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I also fear that there won't ever be a right time to CTB. Hurting my loved ones is inevitable, and I hate it.

 

[lizzywizzy09]

There are some I feel sad about leaving behind. On the other hand, I don't care about hurting certain "loved ones". In fact, they make me want to do it out of spite.

 

[Oathkeeper]

I'm just so tired of hurting everybody I care about. And even if the pain of my death is intense, at least it would be the last time.

 

[Decided98]

That's the only reason I've been on this site for so long. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I also fear that there won't ever be a right time to CTB. Hurting my loved ones is inevitable, and I hate it.

Yeh I believe there is never a right time

 

[lkjhgfdsa1]

wow
i am shocked to see people who have been here for 5 years
i wish your life hadn't gotten to this point

 

[itsneverbeenmoreove]

I simultaneously don't want to hurt my loved ones by dying and don't want to hurt them by living.