I cannot suppress my resentment towards God

[ireallywasnttogopls]

I hope he doesn't exist because I would hate him for everything he's not

 

[absolutethistime]

Me either. He's been so cruel to me.

 

[gardenhouse]

I never hurt anyone, why this unbearable suffering happened to me, while bad people live peacefully

 

[SoverignDreamer97]

Well... supposing that it was He who was said to have subjected all creation to futility, (Romans 8:20-23), what's it to you that he does exist, given that without faith it is impossible to please Him; that all who come to God must believe that He is, and that He's a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him? (Hebrews 11:6)

If you are without faith, and have no desire to seek God, or to have anything to do with Him, His followers, or Christianity itself, then... you shouldn't concern yourself with whether or not the biblical claims are true, and that God exists; so long as you believe not on the Son, you're going to be separated from Him anyway.

For God so loved the world He gave His only begotten Son, Christ Jesus of Nazareth; He died on the cross, His blood was shed for the remission of sins, and then He rose on the third day, that whosoever believes on Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.

"He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God." (John 3:16-21)

Granted, should one desire to be with Him, then it's just a matter of believing on the Son.

Whatever the case, there is no reason to worry, suicide is not a sin that leads to separation, but rather... it's unbelief.