Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I've been on this site for a while I've met some of the nicest, most loving people I've ever met. I've read their stories and cried, knowing how much pain they were in. I'm not sure how one individual can hurt so much. Anyone who has read anything I've posted here knows how much I hate the state (NM) I live in. I've lived in almost every state and overseas as well, so I do know good from bad. I've been here two years - it has been a living hell for me. No one wants to be a friend to someone who isn;t chipper every moment of the day, who has panic attacks in public, who wants to die. It's too much for them. They live in a fantasy world where everything is great, their lives are filled with family and friends. I've been ostracized, rejected, humiliated and unloved my entire life. How I've lasted this long is beyond my comprehension. I was supposed to move next month to a new job, new state, supposedly a new beginning. But it wont be that at all. It will be the same shit show, somewhat like Ground Hogs Day. I believe I'll head home for my final curtain call. Arrangements are made, hopefully I can find some semblance of peace and be with my Dad and my little girl finally. Sorry to be such a downer at such a festive time of year (I'm being a smart ass here), but you all are my family and I know you care about me and if you dont, well, that's ok too.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: Mayonaise, FundamentalAspect, Kit1 and 15 others
AliceinNeverland

AliceinNeverland

Soon to jump off this sinking ship...
Dec 14, 2023
50
I've been here two years - it has been a living hell for me.
I know the pain of hating where you live all too well. I hope that you find peace during your time at home.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: SMmetalhead36 and Kit1
Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I know the pain of hating where you live all too well. I hope that you find peace during your time at home.
Thank you and I wish you peace over the coming holiday.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1 and AliceinNeverland
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,888
I hope that you eventually find the peace you search for, best wishes.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SMmetalhead36 and Kit1
Unknown21

Unknown21

The past never dies.
Apr 25, 2023
985
I wish you luck and eternal peace. my friend
How did you know that you were ready and that it was the right time?

I'm struggling to know if I'm ready or not
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1
Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I wish you luck and eternal peace. my friend
How did you know that you were ready and that it was the right time?

I'm struggling to know if I'm ready or not
I'm in too much emotional pain. I've tried before a couple weeks ago and failed. That will be the only thing that stops me is the fear of failure.
 
  • Aww..
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Kit1, Yaffle and Unknown21
cosmic_traveler

cosmic_traveler

Eternal Spirit Experiencing a Human Moment
Dec 23, 2023
311
I think I might understand how you feel. I can't believe how many times I've put my life on hold to help a "friend" only to find nobody around when I need them. Be well on your journey, wherever it takes you.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1
Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I think I might understand how you feel. I can't believe how many times I've put my life on hold to help a "friend" only to find nobody around when I need them. Be well on your journey, wherever it takes you.
Thank you and I wish you peace
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1
Unknown21

Unknown21

The past never dies.
Apr 25, 2023
985
I'm in too much emotional pain. I've tried before a couple weeks ago and failed. That will be the only thing that stops me is the fear of failure.
Same, what really worries me and stops me is the fear of failure. I cannot bear being blind or paralyzed or living with any disease that makes my life uncomfortable.

I'm sorry you're going through this, I wish you success in your attempt.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1
Tears in Rain

Tears in Rain

..............
Dec 12, 2023
858
. I believe I'll head home for my final curtain call. Arrangements are made, hopefully I can find some semblance of peace and be with my Dad and my little girl finally.
Good luck with your final curtain call, I hope you get the peace you desire.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kit1

Similar threads

B
Replies
4
Views
199
Suicide Discussion
alltoomuch2
alltoomuch2
snowlance
Replies
4
Views
282
Recovery
snowlance
snowlance
snowlance
Replies
3
Views
238
Suicide Discussion
-Link-
-Link-
EmmaQanbana
Replies
0
Views
117
Suicide Discussion
EmmaQanbana
EmmaQanbana
crimsonsflower
Replies
2
Views
332
Suicide Discussion
crimsonsflower
crimsonsflower