I am trying to understand my mind.

[DivineSpark]

It seems like my brain is addicted to negativity. It is weird. Pain, anxiety, despair, makes me feel alive (sounds like some bizzare BDSM fantasy)

 

[Still here]

I've been wondering about the same thing....I think I am addicted to sadness...Movies,books and songs that portray sadness,suicide,grief are the ones intriguing to me....But I am trying to fight this...

 

[22yearsbroken]

If you do manage to figure anything out on how to calm and deal with your mind ... please let me know.. cos mine is lost

 

[Carrot]

It seems like my brain is addicted to negativity. It is weird. Pain, anxiety, despair, makes me feel alive (sounds like some bizzare BDSM fantasy)

Is it only somebodies else pain/anxiety/and-so-on?

Edit:
Without waiting for an answer, and the little I know of you, I've seen some of your posts. I assume that most people don't want to feel pain, don't want to feel bad.

You could be hurting and seeing others hurt could distract you or make you feel better. Others having it worse will not help you or those people in the long run.

I cannot imagine how somebody can wish terrible stuff onto others or see joy in others suffering. How does that help anybody? Maybe because of shifts pain to others, almost acting like a shield of some sort. As long as the pain goes to others and not you, you are relatively safe.

That can work for a while, until it doesn't and you are the target of pain, and nobody is there to help you.

We should unite when others are in trouble. Either because that's the good thing to do, or because when you will be in trouble, others will help you. Preferably the first reason, but either works if you need a pragmatic reason.

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

It just makes sense to me and seems normal.