Venting i am completely worthless

[thelazybones]

i just need to vent
i left university because i was miserable and disliked my course, and my family visited me once in the span I was there- a 40 min drive away. fucking once. since leaving they have shamed me and made me feel even more worthless

I've been told by them that they feel awkward around me and uncomfortable in their own house since I've moved back. my own parents don't want me around . i can't live with my boyfriend atm and i just have nowhere to go. My own family don't even want to be around me how fuckinf useless do you have to be for that to happen lol

 

[アホペンギン]

You aren't useless. Its your family who is useless, actually. Good families would accept how their relatives are and if your family doesn't even do that then you aren't in the wrong, they are. I'm sorry they're treating you like that, though. I sincerely hope you can find relief soon and I send you my best regards. :)

 

[chris1979]

Hi

You're not useless. Your situation sounds so difficult. I hope everything gets better for you soon. Is there any chance to move to a better accommodation?

 

[sad_dude]

Same here ://

 

[darkwater]

I've been told by them that they feel awkward around me and uncomfortable in their own house since I've moved back.

i just have nowhere to go

Seems you're parents are total pieces of shit. I would always help family members even if I not like them.

 

[ChronicallyCynical]

You are not useless. It might be a hard fact to accept because people can make you feel that way because trusting people's words after someone's made you feel that way is very difficult, but you're not useless or worthless, or anything like that.

So, you disliked your course. Plenty of people go to university and find that the course they signed up for may not have quite been what they expected, for better or worse. I wasn't particularly keen on the impossibility of keeping languages as part of my courses going into third year and often second-guessed my choice. Though I made up my mind to stay, I would never shame anyone for choosing differently on the basis that the course didn't turn out as they hoped. Especially if you were miserable there. It's perfectly understandable that you chose to leave, it's not shameful at all.

Also, given that it takes my family three hours to drive to where my university is, I think that's pretty shameful that yours only visited once with a much shorter trip. I mean, my commuting time to campus in the third year took longer than that! It took over an hour for a one-way commute and I had to go between different buses. I understand parents have lives and obligations too, but like...

And I would understand if your parents simply wanted you to be independent, but the fact they can't even feel comfortable with you being around is a completely different - and shitty - matter. Don't blame yourself for that. I would have expected parents to love their kids more, but I've come to learn over the years that just because they are your parents/guardians doesn't mean they're good parents/guardians.

By the way, I know you have nowhere to go atm, but is it possible for you to find other accommodation - maybe move in with someone around your age, to save some money? Have you looked through the different sites for places in the area where someone is looking for a flatmate/housemate? Sorry if this is a stupid question. I hope your living issue gets resolved.