Venting I am a coward

[awaitingdeath]

Been binge watching hanging suicide videos on a gore site and it seems like a pretty nice way to go out. The person passes out in less than a minute and how long it takes after that for death to occur seems inconsequential. But the coward that I am would never muster the courage to hang myself. Instead I dream about all fancy ways like paying an armed security person to shoot me etc. I am scared I will keep lamenting and live on for a long time. God give me courage .

 

[Praestat_Mori]

You're not a coward! It's so difficult to defeat SI. You're not alone.

 

[FuneralCry]

Hanging sounds like a terrifying method to me personally, I certainly envy those who managed to succeed and I don't think that those who struggle with it are cowardly, to me suicide really isn't straightforward at all. But anyway best wishes, I hope that you eventually find what you search for.

 

[Coconut blue]

don't say that about yourself. I do the same often too, spending lots of time on researching, planning, finding sources, etc, but when it actually comes to making up my mind and implementing the plan i always chicken out i guess si is inherent in human nature and it does everything it can to keep us alive