How to stop self sabotaging

[terra.nuvo]

I feel like a big thing holding me back from recovering is my tendency to self sabotage, whether its with relationships or jobs. I don't know what's wrong with me but whenever things start to look up, like when I get a job for example, I always seem to quit and stop putting in the effort to continue. I've been doing this with school too. I think it comes partly from a place of low confidence in myself but I don't know how to get past that. If I am going to survive in this world I need to be able to sustain myself but I don't know how. I wish there were just some magic pill I could take that would make me stop but that doesn't exist.

In terms of relationships, at this point I don't think there's a way for me to fix that part of myself. I've lost so many friendships that I'm just learning to be a loner anyways. I kind of miss having a group of people to go to but at the same time I don't really have the energy to maintain relationships anymore. I don't really know if its self sabotaging if I just don't feel like contacting people. It's sad but the truth is I am probably gonna be alone for the rest of my life due to my inability to keep up with people.

Thinking about this really stresses me out. It's a weird feeling knowing that I shouldn't do something but still not being able to stop myself. It's like I have absolutely no self control.

 

[Zazacosta]

I did very similar things in my life. To be honest I never find a formula to stop that.
Have you tried to do at least few things today, which you like?
How was your day?

 

[terra.nuvo]

I did very similar things in my life. To be honest I never find a formula to stop that.
Have you tried to do at least few things today, which you like?
How was your day?

Ngl it was an ok day today. I still stressed a bit but I tried going for a walk and making music to try to destress. Thank you for asking. I forget to do those things sometimes when the stress gets really bad.

 

[Zazacosta]

Ngl it was an ok day today. I still stressed a bit but I tried going for a walk and making music to try to destress. Thank you for asking. I forget to do those things sometimes when the stress gets really bad.

Good to hear that your day was not so bad.
Do you make a music also? Are you playing on some instrument or do you produce music? If you produce a music, do you want to share with me? I can share you mine piece of music, although it is not very good.

 

[HopingOnaMiracle]

Any idea why you self sabotage?

 

[terra.nuvo]

Any idea why you self sabotage?

I think its partly cause of lack of confidence in myself and a lot due to laziness

 

[Zazacosta]

I think its partly cause of lack of confidence in myself and a lot due to laziness

I would try a guess.
Lazyness can be caused by a lack of motivation, is it right? And it can then be caused by bad mood / depression. Same for lack of confidence.
Am I right?
If yes, then it is a reason why you are here. And you need to find something what lifts your mood up....
Does it give a sense, or not?

 

[terra.nuvo]

I would try a guess.
Lazyness can be caused by a lack of motivation, is it right? And it can then be caused by bad mood / depression. Same for lack of confidence.
Am I right?
If yes, then it is a reason why you are here. And you need to find something what lifts your mood up....
Does it give a sense, or not?

Yes, I get what you're saying. It's just hard to find things that bring up my mood. I was hoping that medicine would do the trick but I have yet to find a medicine that works well for me. I'm thinking about trying exercising though so we'll see how that goes.