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SomeoneDutch

Member
Jan 24, 2022
22
After a very long time of mental healthcare and having tried pretty much everything I am convinced that CTB is the only remaining option for me. I am not wanting to go into details but I just really need some help to actually make the step. Technically the step is so easy to make and hanging myself for example would only take a couple of minutes. I am not afraid of the pain. I am afraid of the nothing afterwards. And maybe the slight hope in my mind that there is a solution for me also holds me back.

Any advice or just anyone reaching out to me privately would be very much appreciated. Mostly I just need someone to talk to with a neutral stance, that can be pro-life, pro-choice, pro-suicide or even a "partner" within Europe that can help me push over the edge.

Thank you and feel free to give me feedback on how to word my post better.
 
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Lebensunwertes

Lebensunwertes

Du bist auf dich allein gestellt
May 26, 2022
141
Doesn't really sound like you are so convinced that cutting the life is the only solution. I think properly researching and preparing your chosen method, thinking your life over, looking into possible alternatives might either help you overcome the survival instinct or completely drive you away from the idea.
 
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SomeoneDutch

Member
Jan 24, 2022
22
Doesn't really sound like you are so convinced that cutting the life is the only solution. I think properly researching and preparing your chosen method, thinking your life over, looking into possible alternatives might either help you overcome the survival instinct or completely drive you away from the idea.
Technically some very off label treatments could theoretically solve things, I am just tired of trying things that have never worked for me.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,351
I feel like many people overcome any fears they have when the pain of living gets to be unbearable and they get desperate. Only you know when it is the right time to leave, I believe that it is a feeling that someone has, and they have no more doubts.

I do not see death as something to be scared of, as it is inevitable for us all anyway. I believe death to be like how before were born, where time passed and yet we were not aware of anything. Instead of fearing death, I only fear life and the method failing. Ctb really can be so difficult as even know we want to die, we are programmed to survive and I'm sorry that it has come to this point for you. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.
 
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SomeoneDutch

Member
Jan 24, 2022
22
I feel like many people overcome any fears they have when the pain of living gets to be unbearable and they get desperate. Only you know when it is the right time to leave, I believe that it is a feeling that someone has, and they have no more doubts.

I do not see death as something to be scared of, as it is inevitable for us all anyway. I believe death to be like how before were born, where time passed and yet we were not aware of anything. Instead of fearing death, I only fear life and the method failing. Ctb really can be so difficult as even know we want to die, we are programmed to survive and I'm sorry that it has come to this point for you. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.
Unfortunately I only reached that point in my life once, where I failed my CTB due to incorrectly tying my knot (unintentionally). I just don't know how to get back to that point. There is a small piece of hope in me that is probably holding me back. It's just not enough to make my life livable.
 
befree

befree

Time to do more enjoyable things _____Goodbye_____
Mar 22, 2022
2,585
I think the biggest fear is the fear of failure. And there is also the survival instinct, which you can't switch off so easily.