Help How to make a safety plan that actually works? Also, any tips to actually practise DBT by myself?

[nitrogenous]

If you want to skip the vents/personal story straight to the questions, just read the bolded texts

Hello everyone,

I am wondering if anyone has any tips on making a safety plan that actually works? I have made numerous safety plans, but nothing actually works… I never even think about using them whenever I relapse or want to ctb. I think part of it is the fact that the safety plan itself looks so plain and just not "aesthetically pleasing". Another thing is accessibility, and most importantly, motivation (especially since I have ADHD).

I was wondering whether there's any template/apps that work for you guys, or even if you have any tips at all (for example is there a custom section you add yourself that works? Is there a list of all possible distractions on the internet so instead of coming up with one from scratch which can be hard, I can just tick things off from that list). Is there a way to make safety planning fun so I will stick to it? I do really have strong ideation and planning, but I want to give it a bit of a shot.

I don't really have any professional supports right now other than my GP and personal supports are also non-existent. Even if I am in crisis and have acted on my thoughts and is unsafe and needed medical attention, the MH team at the emergency department would just discharge me straight away, so for me, this safety plan is the only way I can stay safe, all by myself.

I was told that I needed to have a case manager by a welfare officer at my uni who also happens to work as a social worker in the hospital MH's inpatient unit, but when I went to the emergency two days ago, I got told that "it's only for people who meet certain conditions such as people with bipolar or schizophrenia". I told them I have bipolar too and they didn't believe me and didn't give a shit at all. The public keeps on turning me away, if any, causing me to be more suicidal coming out then coming in. At the same time, my GP told me she can't handle everything on her own, so I really am just stuck in the Australian MH system.

I keep on getting told that DBT would be what helps and I've done 12 weeks of DBT before + 3-4 months of DBT on top of that (I've lost access to it as I no longer can afford the hospital's psychiatrist who is $900 upfront per session…), but it didn't really help me much anyways. The DBT facilitator also told me that I should have "faked" my suicidality when being risk assessed by other people because they won't understand me and would only result in me getting confidentiality broken and put under the EEA and then discharged from the hospital straight up anyways.

As I now can only do DBT by myself (a structured program in my area costs roughly $26,000!), does anyone have any tips on how to do DBT by yourself effectively? I would also appreciate some good DBT resources that is fun and actually works for you guys… I really lack motivation, can barely concentrate and at the same time would really love to give this another try. I think if I can somehow make it fun rather than a chore, then maybe I can practice this better in my day to day living…

And maybe part of that is having a safety kit whenever I go as well? Does anyone here have anything like that and would like to share what you have in your kit that have helped you?

Thank you so much for those who are helping me, I really appreciate every help

 

[charlavail]

I bought a dbt workbook on amazon to try and remember skills that i learned when I was at the MH and intensive outpatient. I haven't opened it BUT that is a way you can learn dbt skills. they also sell dbt skill flashcards so maybe that could be more your route if you're looking for something easy? and youtube videos on dbt skills? you can usually tell what videos are useful and not boring.

i think the thing with dbt is picking 1-2 things and trying them to see if it works, and then moving on. so for example, temperature is helpful for me so whenever i'm having a panic attack or more recently trying not to sh i'll put an ice pack on my chest or literally just get in the shower even with clothes on and turn it on cold. it's a good shock to the system. i have an issue with mindfulness, i hate being present i get a lot of anxiety if i'm left with my own thoughts or focus too much on what i'm doing so that's not for me.

in terms of things you can do to distract yourself, are you crafter? crochet is easy to learn on yt and fun to do. i'm rewatching a show on netflix i've watched before and once that's over i'll probably watch one. I always have it on unless i'm working. audiobooks if you have spotify are free and it's a good way to stay distracted and focused on something else.

 

[nitrogenous]

I bought a dbt workbook on amazon to try and remember skills that i learned when I was at the MH and intensive outpatient. I haven't opened it BUT that is a way you can learn dbt skills. they also sell dbt skill flashcards so maybe that could be more your route if you're looking for something easy? and youtube videos on dbt skills? you can usually tell what videos are useful and not boring.

i think the thing with dbt is picking 1-2 things and trying them to see if it works, and then moving on. so for example, temperature is helpful for me so whenever i'm having a panic attack or more recently trying not to sh i'll put an ice pack on my chest or literally just get in the shower even with clothes on and turn it on cold. it's a good shock to the system. i have an issue with mindfulness, i hate being present i get a lot of anxiety if i'm left with my own thoughts or focus too much on what i'm doing so that's not for me.

in terms of things you can do to distract yourself, are you crafter? crochet is easy to learn on yt and fun to do. i'm rewatching a show on netflix i've watched before and once that's over i'll probably watch one. I always have it on unless i'm working. audiobooks if you have spotify are free and it's a good way to stay distracted and focused on something else.

Thank you so much for your reply :) I haven't really thought about the dbt videos on YT so I might give it a go and see if there's any interesting ones. I'm the same with you, I really hate mindfulness and meditation etc as my mind would just race with rumination all the time so it really doesn't work with me. I think it's a good point in regards to just doing one skill at a time and then going on from there as otherwise it would just cause overwhelmness…

I used to enjoy painting a lot, but recently I've been off it as I get a bit too perfectionistic (something I also need to work on ). Watching shows have been part of my distraction techniques and it used to work, but recently, my mind is just too all over the place that I can't even focus on the shows (despite them being my favourites)… I might give audiobooks a try—maybe it will be a good distraction on the background while doing something else :D

 

[rainbowpuker]

I have work sheets from uk mental health team I can send you , It has a suicide safety plan etc

 

[ihatemen420]

If you google "The neurodivergent friendly workbook of DBT skills", you can find a free pdf of the workbook. The safety plan in this workbook is called a "personal crisis plan" and I think it feels a lot more welcoming and manageable than that dry and clinical safety plan they force you to make in, like, the psych ward. It's more focused on identifying your triggers and your distractions or coping skills that you can use while triggered.
I recommend this workbook in general, it's good. I'm in DBT therapy rn and my therapist has me working through it slowly.

 

[nitrogenous]

I have work sheets from uk mental health team I can send you , It has a suicide safety plan etc

That would be amazing if you're okay with sending me the resources

If you google "The neurodivergent friendly workbook of DBT skills", you can find a free pdf of the workbook. The safety plan in this workbook is called a "personal crisis plan" and I think it feels a lot more welcoming and manageable than that dry and clinical safety plan they force you to make in, like, the psych ward. It's more focused on identifying your triggers and your distractions or coping skills that you can use while triggered.
I recommend this workbook in general, it's good. I'm in DBT therapy rn and my therapist has me working through it slowly.

Awesome, I'm definitely going to look it up especially since I'm a newly diagnosed neurodivergent folk myself, thank you!

 

[rainbowpuker]

That would be amazing if you're okay with sending me the resources


Awesome, I'm definitely going to look it up especially since I'm a newly diagnosed neurodivergent folk myself, thank you!

I'll check email and msns sure there ok to send

 

[sadbh]

Here's are some DBT resources:

Borderline personality resources

I’d really like to learn some skills to help with distress tolerance, splitting, self image, etc. If anyone has resources or personal experience, please share them with me or give me advice on how to apply them 🙏

sanctioned-suicide.net

But tbh, I don't know how to work on the skills myself. I desperately need to :/