How they treat suicidality on other websites

[fatiguecentral]

People have the misconception that if they talk about suicide in any serious way that it's going to put the idea in people's minds.

It's a taboo subject and people want to shut down all discussions immediately.

I've seen reddit comments calling someone who committed suicide "retarded" and "selfish". The lack of basic empathy out there can be astonishing sometimes.

 

[theresonlyonewayout]

I got recommended a 'support' website that I won't name directly however, the idea was you could write whatever you want on a brick and post it. People could read it but there were literally thousands of the things so the probability of someone reading it was low.

Every single brick I wrote caught attention from mods. Obviously I didn't want to trigger anyone but I didn't care if anyone read it, I turned the comments off. I wasn't looking for reaction - just a place to get something out of my head. It felt good to 'get it out there' as I can't say stuff like that to people irl - not even the MHT. Every one got adjusted to be more acceptable to a supposedly self harm/suicidal audience. To be too suicidal for a forum like that just made me feel even more alone and damaged.

All these sites/MHT/hospitals etc seem to do is teach you the acceptable line. It's like a cult - you can't say that you have to say this instead. For example - you can't tell the truth in a mental hospital. You have to chat the 'acceptable' chat with language that they find appropriate.

Here is the ONLY place where I can say how I feel. I want to die right now, this second - please. It's been constantly on my mind and I can't and don't want to fight it anymore. I would do it right now if I could. I'm absolutely ready. See, I managed to say that without looks of pity, confusion, anger, frustration etc every look except one of understanding. Without police knocking, without assessments, getting locked up etc but most of all, I can say it without having to feel guilty.

 

[rotten]

I was told that I had no right to feel depressed because other people have it worse than me.

 

[Marktheghost]

Most people just want quick short term-solutions to long-term problems.

A temporary solution to a permanent problem (!)

I was told that I had no right to feel depressed because other people have it worse than me.

Go and tell it to the man that lives in Hell

 

[J113632]

I'm really sorry you've had to deal with that. It's just one of those things where if you know, you know. Those people on other sites clearly don't.

 

[OblivionSeeker]

In our society, suicide is practically on the scale as Plutonium. something to fear and disdain at the highest levels.

something to restrict...avoid...

My advice: don't ever mention suicidal ideation to friends or family. unless you sincerely DON'T wanna do it.

If you really WANT to do it, then keep your mouth SHUT (to friends, and family).

 

[Sprite_Geist]

Omg I couldn't have put it in better words.
They just don't understand that we never chose to be like this and that depression is a REAL THING!!!

Thank you. You are right that some people do not understand mental disorders/illnesses. However: in some cases they do understand, but decide not to care; feign ignorance to remove responsibility.

Yes - the "You're just not trying hard enough" argument. If a persons depression is only an illusion, despite it also being a medical disorder, then by this logic a paraplegic who is resigned to a wheelchair must be under an illusion too. They are not really crippled; their loss of motor-function is simply because they are not thinking positively - obviously.

or even worse, because they're, quote-unquote, "just too lazy to move"

Good comparison. The "lazy" argument is also (sometimes) applied to poverty too. When it comes to someone being suicidal - the suicidal individual in question is told that the issue is solely their problem. This is one-sided and does not examine they reason(s) behind why someone would actually want to end their own life. Though this might actually be intentional; it removes any and all blame from those around the individual who wishes to die.

Also why did this individual feel the need to call you a loser? What do they think you are losing to - societies artificial game? Every living organism that we know of dies given enough time, so in that sense we all lose in the end.

people already call others (usually men) losers if they couldn't, or don't want to find a mate or company. it's a shaming mechanic that most people would rather use than respect the other party's decision; just because they, quote-unquote, "doesn't understand why anyone would do that". no wonder i don't like people (well, "normies") as much

I think that this comes from the idea that if someone, especially a male, is single then it means they are repulsive in some way otherwise they would be able to attract company. It is similar to how in school you were labelled a "loser" if you did not conform to the standards set out by the so-called popular kids - "you do not fit in therefore you must be broken". The problem with this view is that it does not take into consideration that every individual has a different mind, and certain personality types may have more difficulty forming connections than others, or that the person who cannot find company simply disagrees with the attitudes and philosophy of the groups that they could potentially join.

Those people cannot understand why someone would not wish to be on their own, because they do not know any different. They are likely trying to blend in with a clique, because they themselves fear ridicule from the group should they choose solitude.

I was told that I had no right to feel depressed because other people have it worse than me.

This is a common phrase used to dismiss the pain of whoever is talking about their depression. Those that use this phrase tend to not actually care about others who "have it worse", and are using them as a shield to hide behind to make themselves appear noble.

 

[esclava]

All the other suicide sites I've been on are full of the three Ps: pointless platitudes and pontification. I'm deeply grateful for the haven SS provides