How much do you remember?

[K14~♡]

I noticed that I don't remember much memories from more than 1 year ago. I wondered what I was doing when I was 17 (which was 2 years and 4 months ago) and my mind just went blank at first, but I did remember a few details after some minutes. I can prob remember some more and if think about it further and backtrack

I remember my childhood even less, and I wish I could remember more so that I can identify just what went wrong. I barely remember any emotions from that period too (other than maybe 3 instances which I only recalled while typing this post). I used to think that I was an emotionless and indifferent child cuz I don't remember feeling anything or caring about anyone. I realized though that I can't be sure about this, cuz again, I barely remember

I mostly feel detached from my memories, except from the previous year's memories which I still feel some connection to. My past self doesn't feel like myself, well I guess that's true in a way. But it feels like, my life only started recently, and that the years prior aren't mine

This is all prob just a normal thing, but I sometimes wonder if it's supposed to be this way

How is it like for you guys?

 

[dreaming]

I have huge gaps in my memory, but there are certain specific interactions or events that stay with me usually when I'm in a more emotional state.
Also a lot of useless information that I don't *want* to remember seems to stay with me which I hate.
It's like my brain is full of garbage data I can never remember the things I want to.

 

[Kamaainakupua]

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[Apathy79]

My memory is weird. I remember how I felt in a situation very well. Thousands of events in my life. I remember the emotional state I was in during. Some of these memories are more than 40 years old. But the details are sketchy at best. Especially going way back.

This is one big difference between me and my brother. Like when we hear a joke, he can tell it word for word a year later. All I can recall is the general gist and that it was funny. His is a much more useful memory!

Your comments about feeling like it was another person or another life beyond a few years are fascinating though. That's not my experience. I mean we all change but that seems like a huge seismic shift so that your old self isn't recognisable as you anymore. I wonder if there was a significant event in there that triggered it?

 

[K14~♡]

My memory is weird. I remember how I felt in a situation very well. Thousands of events in my life. I remember the emotional state I was in during. Some of these memories are more than 40 years old. But the details are sketchy at best. Especially going way back.

This is one big difference between me and my brother. Like when we hear a joke, he can tell it word for word a year later. All I can recall is the general gist and that it was funny. His is a much more useful memory!

Oooo, you siblings seem to have good memory retention? Though in different aspects. I think it's also useful to remember how you felt in past situations

I wonder if there was a significant event in there that triggered it?

I would like to know too if there's any TT I don't remember any significant events that could cause this. I think detachment from my past self is likely due to my dissociation?

 

[vyvanceandvodka]

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[K14~♡]

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[GodzillasBiggestFan]

i remember very little of childhood. i have some memories from highschool but most of my memories are from after high school. i was very surprised that my parents who are in their seventies tell me how much they remember from childhood.

 

[Asya]

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[ScaredCutter]

idk. ive forgotten most of my life from like 2016 and backwards, gradually ill lose it for 2017 and such. besides major things or things that managed to saty in my head

 

[HopelessScientist]

I have amazing good memory... Until this depression episode that started 4 years ago. It's all been a blur. If I have cues to recall, I will, but otherwise I cannot really tell how much time has even passed, I feel like I am still 22, I feel like I died then.

 

[paranoias64]

i feel like i used to remember my childhood fairly well until 2020 (when i was 18) but i remember less and less as the years go by. is it cause of covid? my routine? the decline of my mental health? maybe a subconscious need to forget those years where i was hurting so deeply? is it actually entirely natural and healthy given my current age? hard to say, but i think it's a bit of all of the above in my case.

 

[Even Flow]

I remember everything but not my passwords

 

[em4250]

I have pretty good memory, grateful for that because my memories are important to me.

 

[Pluto]

 

[coffeeandcats]

My memory is shit. Someone will ask me the most simplest ass question "What music do you listen to?" And I suddenly forget every piece of music to ever exist

 

[desire2ctb]

i only remember a few emotional moments from when i was a kid, i dont remember the ages, and then some from the teenage years. i think since ive lived life as an observer and never actually experienced much and also living the NEET life for nearly a decade has basically destroyed all of my mundane memories

 

[InversedShadow]

It's interesting but I often remember smells, sounds and feelings more than actual details within a memory; I can remember many things but as long as they're connected to some of the other senses I remember them much better; my memory tends to be rather random, sometimes I cant tell what happened 2 days ago while easily being able to remember what happened last week!

 

[ConfusedClouds]

I also have a weird memory. My 'working' memory has always been rubbish. I think I've always preferred maths/science subjects because there was less memory required - I could work out exam answers through logic/problem solving rather than trying to get reams of info into my longer term memory. I also have gaps and limited memory of my childhood. I've also always been generally emotionless. Except recent years where things have fallen apart a bit. I get waves of uncontrollable emotion well out of context, yet not react to other stuff.

But I also have no known significant trauma type event. Lots of minor generic traumas associated with living live through to my 30s but none that constantly haunt or create thoughts/flashbacks. Any 'flashback' type day dreams are more commonly over reactions to ruminating about and regretting things I said or have been told, not any one 'event'/'period'. Therapist said with my freezing and disassociating I do 'present as severely traumatised'. But it just doesn't add up and I function totally fine a lot of the time. I'm fine but I'm not fine. Its kinda weird and unnerving. And real hard to try explaining. So I don't really bother trying.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

similar. the human brain is weak imo. i hardly remember anything . time flies. i don't think anyone can type what hey did every 5 minutes or even every hour of any day a few months ago or any day last year when given the year. memories are reconstructed.

also you can only keep about 4 things or chunks of information in short term memory

Short-term memory typically holds information for only 20 to 30 seconds.

also the conscious mind can only process a very small number of bits per second .

so imo you can only think about 1 thing and 4 characteristics of it at one time . the human brain is very weak and the powerful thing they repeatedly say it is. that's why it's so hard to do anything complex or difficult and to decide on a complex decision imo

the horror is that it can create unending constant unbearable pain. and then all you can do is focus on that pain and nothing else and hoping it stops but it won't and the added horror that it wont

 

[February_In_April]

I can hardly remember much most of time as days go by and I lose my train of thought a lot. The things that I usually remember is bits and pieces of trauma related things from my past and sometimes old unrelated event in my past but just bits and pieces. I usually need to type/write things down to keep track of what I need to do on a daily so I don't miss doctor/therapy/psychologist appointments among other things as well. It also hard for me to learn new things and retain information on subjects like when I was in school and when I tried collage. It was also hard when trying to train for new jobs I just felt lost and overwhelmed most of the time. so overall I would say my memory is just in a really bad state as of now.

 

[neverexistedd]

I don't know, I started to have gaps in my memory and I mostly feel detached from them as if they weren't real

 

[Noct]

My memory is weird. I remember how I felt in a situation very well. Thousands of events in my life. I remember the emotional state I was in during. Some of these memories are more than 40 years old. But the details are sketchy at best. Especially going way back.

This is one big difference between me and my brother. Like when we hear a joke, he can tell it word for word a year later. All I can recall is the general gist and that it was funny.

I experience memory very similarly! Most of my memories are emotions based, meaning I either predominantly remember the memory through impressions of the emotions or I remember the memory in great clarity (events, people, etc.) due to the strong memories that I experienced at the time.

Sometimes I also just generally can have very strong memories of most of my life but only when it wasn't periods where everything felt the same. During my worst years of depression on and off I lose strong memories for years at a time because it truly all blurred together into one amorphous blob of suicidal thoughts, ideation, attempts, loneliness, pain, or pure misery.

Ironically despite my good memory of many events (even if it's not in the details) I am such a forgetful person in my day to day life. My ADHD makes me loose everything — items, time, appointments, things I've said or done recently, the last thing someone said to me, conversations, faces, etc. Makes it equally frustrating to not have a more practical/useful memory like your brother has.

 

[Life's not a comedy]

I remember way too much. I wish I didn't but that's just one of many reasons for me

 

[A Sit of Doubting]

i remember most of my childhood bc i was a very quiet and isolated child, which left me to my emotions n observations. i still remember events that had no emotional relevance to me at all. up until hs, where most trauma was dealt, i had very nice memory. then i started blocking out a lot since i felt deep negativity routinely. i hate that all i can remember is the feeling so all these hateful or positively impacting events are for naught. i feel like my brain was messed w cause now i can barely remember stuff except the most inane shit i could live without. i usually trick my brain into remembering stuff by chanting "ill forget abt this, ill most definitely forget abt this" lollll

 

[hizuchan]

depressed since early teens. I can't remember anything specific from my life. If I had to write an autobiography I feel like most of it would be pure lies lol
Entire years are blurred out, I can't tell what year some event from my life took place. I sometimes even catch myself saying things like "I'm 14" even though I'm almost 24.

 

[hizuchan]

I remember way too much. I wish I didn't but that's just one of many reasons for me

It feels like I only remember the bad things. And they just circle around in my head 24/7

 

[PanaxMan]

I noticed that I don't remember much memories from more than 1 year ago. I wondered what I was doing when I was 17 (which was 2 years and 4 months ago) and my mind just went blank at first, but I did remember a few details after some minutes. I can prob remember some more and if think about it further and backtrack

I remember my childhood even less, and I wish I could remember more so that I can identify just what went wrong. I barely remember any emotions from that period too (other than maybe 3 instances which I only recalled while typing this post). I used to think that I was an emotionless and indifferent child cuz I don't remember feeling anything or caring about anyone. I realized though that I can't be sure about this, cuz again, I barely remember

I mostly feel detached from my memories, except from the previous year's memories which I still feel some connection to. My past self doesn't feel like myself, well I guess that's true in a way. But it feels like, my life only started recently, and that the years prior aren't mine

This is all prob just a normal thing, but I sometimes wonder if it's supposed to be this way

How is it like for you guys?

Id say depends on what happened within your life wether your experienced emotion trauma to verbal trauma to real trauma (PTSD and other psychotic disorders)

 

[EternalShore]

It's interesting but I often remember smells, sounds and feelings more than actual details within a memory; I can remember many things but as long as they're connected to some of the other senses I remember them much better; my memory tends to be rather random, sometimes I cant tell what happened 2 days ago while easily being able to remember what happened last week!

That's interesting! :) I tend to remember things based on what game I was playing at the time~ xD

other than that, my memory tends to be pretty good for my younger years before heavily fading away as my life gets worse~ ofc, I'm forgetting a fair bit about my younger years too tho as those get further away as well~ :<

I'm glad the more recent parts have generally gone away, altho I wish they could sooner~ :/

 

[herms_sn]

I seem to remember the weirdest things from decades ago, but sometimes forget whether or not I had a meal when going to bed.
Unfortunately, I tend to mostly remember negative stuff from the past; perhaps that's why they say looking back gives you depression, looking ahead anxiety.