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sarahR
Experienced
- Nov 11, 2020
- 225
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
Realized the reasons in the first place. I knew something is wrong with my head. For an year tried to live with the "i've bipolar" idea, witch also fit quite well, but it didn't helped alot. So by accident i was watching youtube videos about mental health and found out what osdd/did is. I had no idea such thing existed and it made sence to all. So we have an alter or a few more, that don't wanna exists. I know their resons and there is really logic behind it. Anyway it was good to know that there are others, that don't mind death, but have some plans and ambitions to be set before we go. So without any risk boundries we made a deal on how to keep it on for now and possibly in the future.Clean from ctb thoughts? How did you do it?
Almost 2 days for me hope to see day 3.
For those who don't know what it is - it's basically the highest level of PTSD, and few or many minds/well actually people/ share one body with different memories or some shared memories with possible emotional detachment from them./ And it's hard to spot even by yourselfs.
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Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
GravityUtilizer
Born to lose
- May 22, 2020
- 737
0. But had a good run of days/maybe even weeks before this weekend. Nothing too major happened; it can just get on you again can't it? A tedious cycle of false dawns and crushing lows.
sarahR
Experienced
- Nov 11, 2020
- 225
Today I'm in 0 just want this day to be done with! Please night arrive so I can go to sleep!
Querry1
life is unfair, ctb or get away
- Aug 16, 2018
- 180
My last weekend I've had no suicidal thoughts since a long time, but today we back on it baby, I'm on meds so those may affect it as I'm ready to end it all but I'm still trying for my sister and my friends, I want to exploit all of the options, sorry for the little rant
signifying nothing
-
- Sep 13, 2020
- 2,553
I think reading about others on this site has helped me feel less suicidal, but I don't think the idea is ever going to be off the table.
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
brood
It's how I live, not how long I live.
- Sep 4, 2019
- 62
Every day, often more than once a day I balance the life I have against the life I wish for, taking into consideration increasingly limited mobility, body parts that just don't work as they used to, aches and pains and whether I still look forward to tomorrow. So far I am happy to carry on, but I can see that at sometime in the future I will make the decision to kill myself and I am happy and comfortable with the situation. Everything is in place for the act to be carried out, I believe I will know when the time is right, not too far in the future I think.
VivaldiBR
Experienced
- Oct 4, 2020
- 249
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
IRIYAMA
Student
- Apr 10, 2018
- 146
A day break from the ideation on rare occasions. Feels like it's consumed me totally.
sadworld
existence is a nightmare
- Aug 25, 2020
- 3,870
Deleted member 23009
a flame dancing in the rain
- Oct 20, 2020
- 138
Gromit-CTB
time for ctb
- Nov 14, 2020
- 847
VivaldiBR
Experienced
- Oct 4, 2020
- 249
Clean from ctb thoughts? How did you do it?
Almost 2 days for me hope to see day 3.
I told the things i'm doing here:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...ds-and-psychiatrist-about-planning-ctb.51990/
VivaldiBR
Experienced
- Oct 4, 2020
- 249
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
puppy9
au revoir
- Jun 13, 2019
- 1,238
