How long have you been suicidal?

[Tortured_empath]

Just curious. There has been a thread like this a while ago, thought I'd make a new one.

 

[SuicidalSymphonies]

I've known I didn't really want to live since 7, but full blown suicidal, I was 13. I'm 22 now.

 

[trynacbt]

It's been three and a half years for me. So thankful I found this forum.

 

[JSauter]

Only in the past 6 months has it gotten to the point where I've realized that there's no way out of my situation except death. Up until this point, I've eschewed the suicide option and used coping mechanisms to deal with the issues that brought me to this threshold. I could not imagine what it's like to feel as if death is the only option as a young person. I see a lot of 20-somethings on this site. I also see people who admit that they've wanted to die as children. This breaks my heart.

 

[Nem]

Ever since my dr fucked me up the ass with shit meds and my asshole ex demanded I keep taking them and nearly died. Ever since then I've been bent on suicide
Peace/hugs
I need to kill myself even more so now, I have ordered F and am waiting for it to arrive. My sn is possibly screwed up due to shitty packaging
Peace/hugs/DEATH
Holy fuck I need to die, like today might have to be the end of this fucking life

 

[lostangel]

Roughly three years now

 

[Darkhaven]

Since July 2018.

 

[DeathImminent]

Since 2014 i was 18

 

[Icarus]

Since May of this year

 

[sammii]

Since I was about 12 or 13, I'm 28 now. I think my first attempt was when I was about 15.

 

[MeltingHeart]

V. Fleeting in the past. Intensely since Jan' 19

 

[Bpdboii]

Since May of this year.

 

[AngelOfDeath01]

I feel like I always felt that there is something wrong in life since I have been a small child and I had so many existential questions at an early age. I do remember how I would be sometimes observing people and lost in my thoughts. Answering your question now, I had suicial thoughts for 3 years but it has been 5 months now since I am actively suicidal and planning it.

 

[Squiddy]

It comes and goes, but most recently, since 2017

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

It's come and gone for me over the years but my first attempt was probably at 15. The last three or four years have been dead set on it and looking very deeply into different options.

 

[wanttodie]

about 25 years

 

[tom90]

Last three months, and with every day my wish to die is getting stronger.

 

[BridgeJumper]

13 years. Lmao thats so sad its funny

 

[R32]

I'm depressed since 2007 and don't want to exist anymore since 2011. Eight long ass years. =/

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

Since 8.

 

[Chronicillness]

I thought I was suicidal since I was 13, but that wasn't suicidality, that was extreme emotional instability. Only after I had a surgical procedure by a greedy doctor at age 19 did I actually feel like suicide was inevitable and necessary. Age 26 now and the feelings for suicide are more visceral than ever before. I no longer feel like I am taunting myself with suicide but that it's now the most rational and sane decision I could make because of the profoundly overwhelming circumstances and suffering I face on a daily basis.

 

[BadDoctors]

When I got sick for the first time 3 years ago. That's when my thoughts began. I was a pretty happy person before that. Had fun, made plans for the future, enjoyed life. But all that's over now. I bought a rope maybe two years ago to keep in my trunk of my car just incase life got too hard. Two weeks ago, I took it out for the first time and set up my noose... life's hard.

 

[Empty Smile]

About 25 years.

 

[Fragile]

I didn't want to live since i was 7 or 8, then at 11 I finally understood the concept of suicide and realized that i wanted to to end my own life. first serious attempt at 17.

almost 3 decades of knowing that i will eventually end it all.

 

[DepressionsAHo]

13 years. Lmao thats so sad its funny

Same. I was around 8 when I made my first attempt. 12 or 13 next. 19 and 20 after that. Waiting to get my second job so I can order n and when I get fired its lights out for me

 

[Reyki6667]

16 years.
"temporary problem" they say.

 

[takeyourshotfunboy]

I've had suicidal thoughts since the age of 8 or so, but 9 was when things really went downhill.
I started having thoughts at 8, but things really went downhill when I was 9. First "serious" attempt at 13, but I had multiple half-hearted ones before.

 

[vulturecyclop]

I'n 25. Been unknowingly depressed since I was 12, deeply depressed for 8 years, suicidal for 3 years.

 

[Jack4230]

Since around 14 or 15 but it comes in waves, sometimes I get really suicidal and other times I'm not suicidal but still depressed

 

[Wreck-it-Riley]

The heavy abuse started around 4, and i wanted escape. I kept trying to run away, and they basically said "if you want out, die" and i tried at 6. So 22 years since my first attempt.