How live after

[RockyRockman]

I wouldn't say I am recovered by any means but in recent months the light at the end of the tunnel almost seems visible now. Yet, I have known depression and suicide for as long as I can remember. I find it hard and almost impossible to see a way to live without suicidal thoughts. I feel like it is almost harder to live without them at this point. It has been such a big part of my life it's scary to think of a life without it at all if that's possible. I almost find comfort in my status quo yet want to escape the pain. Does anyone else feel the same way?

 

[terra.nuvo]

Yes. I have suffered from suicidal thoughts for a while now and its to the point where I feel like they are just a part of me. I don't know who I'd be without them. But I still hope one day that I find a way to lose them for good. Although it seems scary, I feel like i'd be better without them and be able to focus on making something of my life. They take up so much energy. Even though they've kind of become a comfort for me, I realize that they are a burden.

It's good to hear that you are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I hope someday I am also able to.