How has your day?

[Special Week]

Today's been a right pain for me, of all days, it was 33 degrees and really sunny (EVEN THOUGH IT'S THE END OF SEPTEMBER WHEN, IN THEORY, TEMPERATURES SHOULD BE FALLING), which I really hate, as I get red from all that sun, not to mention the bloody heat

but anyway, today I woke up late for vocational training; I had to get dressed straight away and dash out to catch the train to my vocational training centre, which is a right pain to get to, and on top of that I arrived at school way too late, my techaer almost marked me absent

Then I decided to just leave school early today and pretended that I'd broken a brace and had to go to the dentist urgently, which the teacher totally believed and let me go, but then, as I was leaving school, it occurred to me that maybe I could get my brackets taken off today (Context: I've been wearing these bloody braces for over three years and I'm honestly fed up with them; I literally can't smile in every damn photo and on top of that they're a right pain to wear, plus getting them off doesn't usually take very long, plus I'd already told my dentist I wanted him to take these brackets off)

Anyway, I rang my dad and asked if he could book an appointment with the dentist for today; the bastard took nearly 20 MINUTES to book the appointment, and he told me it was at 7 pm, which really pissed me off, but I just went anyway, took the train again, got back to the shitty neighbourhood where I live and went for a short walk in my local park, not without first buying a Monster and drinking the whole lot, which sent my blood sugar soaring and made me feel a bit hyper and irritable.

I got home, and all I could see for dinner was some shitty, overcooked pasta made by my fat, bitchy stepmum. In the end, I chucked that rubbish away because I'd rather starve to death than eat crap made by that fat bitch.

Anyway, I had a row with my dad for a bit about some trousers that were way too big for me and I didn't want

then it was 7 pm and I went to the dentist as planned. I told them I had a broken bracket (which, before going in, I'd actually cracked a bit so it would be noticeable) and I didn't even have the guts TO SAY THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO WEAR BRACES ANYMORE AS I'D ORIGINALLY PLANNED; I just kept quiet like an idiot, whilst they fixed the bracket that I'd broken on purpose, and then I just left

A shitty day, to be honest, and on top of that, it's Monday today xd

But anyway, how's your day been? You can write massive rambles if you want, just like I've done XD

 

[My Song Your Note]

My days been pretty lax so far.

Im really tired lol, even though I got like 13 hours of sleep. been getting like 12-15 h ours of sleep every night, cause tbh it feels better to sleep than be awake.

Its a nice day out, its 73F rn, ~23 C. I want to go out and do something, but i don't have the motivation to. I haven't had the motivation to get up and do anything for the last couple of weeks. In a way, I kinda lost hope for life if yknow what i mean.

I don't want to feel like this. I don't want to die. But it seems like the only way I can truly be at peace. I messed up so much.

Sorry, its just venting at this point but its all thats on my mind lol