How has this forum effected you?

[TAW122]

This forum has brought me peace and solace in my darkest times. The allowance of being able to discuss methods and also openly discuss about suicide without judgment, threat of involuntary force, or pro-life rhetoric has helped more than any therapist, counselor, or professional. I would NEVER speak about suicide or right to die IRL as it is too dangerous and has a great chance of being hospitalized only for having a contrary view that opposes the rosy-tinted lens of how life is always great and valuable. Life itself isn't always great and death isn't always a tragedy. This is the only place that allows discussion of the topic of the right to die, suicide, and personal freedom of choice without censorship and has helped more people than hurt. Also, there were at least two (maybe three) times where I made a recovery from being actively wanting to die to only passively wanting to die (last summer 2018 and even recently spring 2019).

 

[SinisterKid]

I have been hoping to find some site resembling this for a very long time. I want to be in a online place where others have the same issues I have. I do not feel so much of a pariah.

I was staff on another forum where we could not talk about the main issue, suicide. No methods, no timelines. Whilst I had a huge amount of compassion and empathy for other users, I found it increasingly difficult to reconcile what I was doing and saying with what I actually felt. So I left because I needed the freedom to express myself and here I have found just that.

I will never encourage anyone to take their own life neither will I try to prevent them. I will not wish anyone good luck in catching their bus. We are all here for our own reasons and I respect that. I am just thankful to have found this place, it might just have given me a reason to keep going for another day and I desperately need that right now.

 

[GeorgeJL]

Before I found this website I wanted to end my life when I was an old man many years from now, since coming here I still want to do the same. Nothing has changed for me in that regard. I do enjoy talking to like minded people here on this forum. I've been on other suicide forums, but none like this. And I say that in the best way possible. My only hope is that I wish more people tried to help others get better. But this is a pro-choice forum so we will reflect back anyone's wishes to exit life.

 

[BipolarExpat]

Mixed

A lot of triggers here when I'm feeling particularly sensitive. Also, my own obsessiveness causes me to scroll endlessly...(maybe better than FB or similar sites(?).

OTOH, it is refreshing to be able to open up...(tho I still haven't completely - i.e.: feeling very uniquely stuck in the Middle East presently, so can't always relate to others, their options, etc.) ...with a low fear of judgement.

 

[Lorenz]

This website has had a mixed effect on me I have not had suicidal thoughts for 2 months until I found this site my suicidal thoughts have worsend but knowing they are people who might be going through the same thing as me give me a peace of mind to finally know I am not alone

 

[FallenRose]

This site has made me feel way less alone in what I'm dealing with. Often times trying to talk to someone who doesn't know what you're feeling makes things worse since, to them suicide is never an option because they can't even think of it being one. This is a safe space for me to work out my suicidal thoughts and not feel so crazy for having them. It helps to not keep things bottled inside for fear of being labelled crazy by someone who looks at suicide as something irrational, to be avoided at all costs.

 

[Asta]

This site has given me something more to look forward to each day. Have felt a lot less depressed since joining. Thank you S.S. and all the amazing people who post here!

 

[Oblivion Lover]

I haven't been on here for long, but I can say that this forum is affecting me in many positive ways, and being among a community that broke free of society's conditioning makes me wiser every day. I could compare this site to the red pill of the Matrix movie. It shows the harsh truths of life for those who are willing to see it. Unfortunately, 7 billion people prefer the blue pill.

 

[cornflowerblue]

It has stopped me from attempting using methods that would be dangerous or particularly traumatizing to those who'd find me. It has postponed my attempts for over a year so far, because I've learned how ineffective many methods are. It has stopped me from attempting using a nonlethal method that would have rendered me permanently disabled or in a vegetative state.

 

[not_a_robot]

Well frankly Scarlet it's really fucking with my SI to keep being reminded that I'm not the only one who feels the way I do.
fiddle-dee-dee, for tomorrow is another day...

 

[Mljonzy]

This site has made life a tiny bit more bearable and i like the fact that we are all one big fucked up family.

 

[Superfluous]

At first, it gave me the resources and information to plan my 1st attempt. The members here also provided me with much needed emotional support in a time of need. When my 1st attempt failed, I again received the emotional support I needed to overcome that failure.

Now, whilst I have a new plan C in place, and still have my plan B, I've been given a brief opportunity to reevaluate my life and reconsider whether it's worth trying to climb out of this massive hole I've dug for myself. I haven't decided yet, but I still have a little time.

This is the only place I can come to talk about my problems. As supportive as my friends irl are, they can't understand what I am going through as they haven't experienced it, and trying to talk to them about it just makes them feel helpless as they want to help but can't.

Here, there are people who do understand and can help.

 

[Conflicted Cat]

It's made me feel a little less miserable. Who knew an Internet forum could exist without toxic condescending assholes. Everyone's nice to everyone for the most part. We all understand each other. Sanctioned Suicide feels more like a home than... You know, home itself.

Whether your certain you want to CTB, or your on the fence and not quite sure what you want, like me, you have a place here. As long as you're kind to everyone. The admins/mods are great too. Seriously. Don't take that for granted. They've done so much to make SS a good place for people like us.

It's become a part of my daily routine to check this site, and listen to others who need to vent, and be understanding, when everyone else outside of SS won't. I may not make actual posts, but I'm here to listen if you need to vent, and talk.

 

[Broken Chimera]

It's helped me realize that I'm not alone with my feelings. That I'm not as damaged as I thought I was. It's also great to be able to talk without getting the canned responses that society loves to repeat. I learned better methods to ctb and I hope to use one soon.

 

[Person]

I am grateful this website is here. Its comforting to be able to express my feelings in an area where I am not judged.

It's also saved me from ending up permanently brain/organ damaged, because I honestly thought a few bottles of otc drugs would do it for me. But I can see now it would just fuck me up even more. I'm grateful this website saved me from that experience.

 

[Strumgewehr]

I really do love cats, I can talk about them all day.

It's simple!
> People like Cats
> I like Cats
> I like People

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

It's perhaps telling that I've never felt more at home on any other internet-based community. It's the only one that is full of people who are similar to me in some of the most important ways. People who have struggled, who see life for what it is, who get how dumb so much of it is. Who aren't full of pretense or cliches, who think critically and deeply, who internalize a lot, and experience mental health issues that are still taboo for the general public. In some ways it's even restored my faith in humanity, and ironically turned me around from some of the darker paths more often than it's lead me down them.

I love this place and see the people here as family, outside of the inevitable handful of bad eggs.

 

[Nameless101]

I feel less lonely. I've spent a lot of time finding people who will understand my problems. Now I have more than I expected. Thank you

 

[Scribble Fan]

I've found a strange, unfamiliar sense of belonging. People actually get me and I understand them. It's a shock, I've always been too different for that. I feel normal on this forum.

I was suicidal before arriving but my methods were horrible. Here I found clear explanations for partial suspension and the night-night method. Now when I ctb I shouldn't be a veggie for life

 

[lululoo]

This forum has been a great comfort to me. It's so much better having a place where I can talk openly about CTB plans and fears.

I do think I'm a little too addicted and wish I could step away more. Only because there are certain things on here that set me off and it would be better for my state of mind to avoid them. Like for instance, the theorizing about what type of people can CTB, who from the forum will CTB, etc., makes me more doubtful that I can go through with it. And thinking I can't go through with it is terrifying to me.

 

[SinisterKid]

This forum has been a great comfort to me. It's so much better having a place where I can talk openly about CTB plans and fears.

I do think I'm a little too addicted and wish I could step away more. Only because there are certain things on here that set me off and it would be better for my state of mind to avoid them. Like for instance, the theorizing about what type of people can CTB, who from the forum will CTB, etc., makes me more doubtful that I can go through with it. And thinking I can't go through with it is terrifying to me.

Nothing wrong with doubts, perfectly natural and legitimate in every sense. As for those threads, if you know they are triggers, avoid them and dont allow them to spoil your time here. I have a couple of people that if I see them post, I just avoid the thread completely as I know they are going to annoy the hell out of me and I am too tired and too old for that shit.

 

[LifeIsNotFun]

It's made me realize I am not alone about the way I feel. Before this forum, I felt so isolated.

 

[inconsequential]

I knew I wasn't alone, but this forum reminded me of that. It's been difficult without my old Discord chat & without other forums. I'm very glad I found this place. Everyone seems to be rather kind and welcoming, even if I'm weird.