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Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,290
I go to sleep exhausted. I wake up exhausted. I want to be constantly inebriated so I can feel... less. I had high hopes (no pun intended) for some recently acquired CBD gummies, but my mood remains unchanged when I eat them.

I don't believe anything can or will alter how I feel. A job would serve as a distraction, but I think about having to smile and interact with real people and I doubt my ability to pull it off for any extended length of time. At least not sober. No fucking way.

Last night I found myself wishing it could be dark all the time. Hearing other people come to life with the sunrise irks the shit out of me.

I want everything to be still, always.

Anyway, there's hardly any difference between waking and falling asleep. Same exact thoughts and feelings. But waking is the worst of the two.
Try THCA.
 
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I

Idontmatter

Just want it all to be over
Oct 25, 2021
647
Sad, exhausted, i feel like I want to die on a daily basis. No motivation
 
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Reactions: donealready and ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ƒ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
46,711
I always feel so incredibly tired of everything to such an extreme extent. I have such a problem with and such a strong dislike for existing so of course every waking moment of mine will be spent wishing to permanently exit this world. It's what has always made sense for me. I just wish for the inability to be conscious and aware of any of this, I never want to wake or think about any of this ever again, it's such a burden still being trapped here.

There is such torture that lies in the knowledge that the only way to be free from this all is so difficult to achieve, the least we deserve after being so unfairly forced into this world is a guaranteed and peaceful exit, as in my case only death could bring me the relief that I need and it's tragic how we are denied this.
 
M

MideonNViscera

Student
Nov 26, 2021
146
I go through a cycle most days. I wake up and go "oh no not again" then I go have coffee, and then go to the gym. At the gym I usually work myself into a rage at my situation, and then by the time I come home I might have about an hour before the hopelessness sets in where I half heartedly try to do things to pull me out of this.

By lunchtime I am completely exhausted, and usually too anxious to eat. I will generally eat something by the end of the day, and always go to bed early because everything feels a bit better in the dark, and a lot better when I am asleep.
 

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