How do you spend your last hours before CTB? Or: How do you prepare your mind?

[naookoo128]

So, the more stuff I get together to realize a proper SN protocol, the more I think about how that last day will look.
But this post is not only about my method, whatever youre going to do, jump, hang, shoot, w/e, I´d be interested in things that make you focus, so you can overcome SI and stay calm.

One thing I like about my method is, that it needs some time to prepare that day. I think I will need stuff to do. I will clean my apartment (one of my favorite things to do) and sort my stuff, throw many things away, keep things in a box that friends and family may want to keep. Delete accounts I made on the Internet. Hopefully being able to write some more sentences for my loved people. Preparing a timed message for a friend to send the ambulance to my place.
Maybe going for a walk, listening to music? But I´m very afraid to do so, to let my mind wander. Maybe I´ll just stay as isolated as I can, like the last months. Im trying to push away thoughts like "one last walk, one last song, one last call,..." and so on. It will just be insanely painfull for me I think. Maybe I just dont want to see/hear/feel what I´ll miss, knowing it was the last time.
But what about you?

wishing u the best

 

[gifted.pumpkin]

One of the things I'll definitely have to do, maybe several days in advance, is to delegate all my possessions of value, like my car etc, to someone that will stay alive.
Also might be useful to close the bank account, deactivate SIM card or stop any other subscriptions, make sure you paid the bills etc and have that info listed for the family, because the amount of troubles with paperwork where I'm from is just terrible. Would not want them to have to deal with that.
Hehe reminded me of A Man Called Ove where the main character also prepared for his death.

Sorry you were asking for mind prepping and I went into another sphere completely but for me it is a part of it - just making sure the people nearby won't have to deal with my mess, just my body. Somehow it's comforting, you know

 

[naookoo128]

One of the things I'll definitely have to do, maybe several days in advance, is to delegate all my possessions of value, like my car etc, to someone that will stay alive.
Also might be useful to close the bank account, deactivate SIM card or stop any other subscriptions, make sure you paid the bills etc and have that info listed for the family, because the amount of troubles with paperwork where I'm from is just terrible. Would not want them to have to deal with that.
Hehe reminded me of A Man Called Ove where the main character also prepared for his death.

Sorry you were asking for mind prepping and I went into another sphere completely but for me it is a part of it - just making sure the people nearby won't have to deal with my mess, just my body. Somehow it's comforting, you know

No need to be sorry, this kind of input is also very welcome, thank you!

 

[kopebaldy]

There won't be any delay between preparation and ctb, I won't give my brain any fighting chance this time.

 

[Daphne]

Good question, i would also like to know how people psyche themselves out to over ride SI. I tend to get complacent and not want to think about it. I suppose when the time comes and I am on the cusp of experiecing the terrible fate awaiting me in life I will hopefully embrace leaving the planet with more certainty and determination.

 

[dearlydeparted44]

Just going about the business of doing it. I've come to realize that if I meditate, I give my brain a chance to talk me out of it. I'm going to exercise one final spontaneous physical act and just pull the trigger. Let the chips fall where they may.

 

[naookoo128]

A very helpful and well-written thread from Joe (RIP) about SI:

Scientific Approach to Understanding SI and Discussion on Tools to Minimze SI Factors

This post aims to provide an educational/informational overview of the various scientific factors that contribute to survival instincts (SI), particularly the innate drive for self-preservation and the automatic responses that arise in the face of harm and danger. While it does not delve into...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[Pale_Rider]

As it turned out for me when I did I didn't need prep. I was just ready. I was done.

 

[purpp37]

Benzodiazepines to calm my nerves about what could lie beyond this realm. If eternal oblivion isn't granted to me.