How do you deal with FOMO? Feeling like I'm missing out on life is one the biggest reason I want to ctb

[Harasaki]

I'm terrible socialy speaking and I've never had friends so I don't know what's like going out and getting drunk, having someone to go to the cinema, going to parties or really just having someone to talk and share secrets. I'm also extremelly ugly, so much that I hate looking at the mirror therefore I probably won't ever find a boyfriend or a girlfriend.
Seeing my cousins and coleagues from school hanging out makes me feel extremely jealous, I spend hours everyday wishing I had friends and it's a terrible feeling, is there a way to accept that I'll always be lonely without it making my heart ache? Anyone else with the same problem?

 

[little helpers]

the same old dread wishing someone irl can just talk to me and they don't. very relatable.

btw I like your avatar :)

 

[Harasaki]

Thank you :) It's my favourite mahou shoujo.

Even when someone in real life speaks to me I act all weird and push them away hahahah why am I a freak?

 

[moths]

yeah i get it. i hate it so much, i hate that every one around me, even the ones who are also depressed and have anxiety have it together so much better than me. they have friends, relationships, jobs, hobbies, etc. i know i've missed out on a lot and it makes me feel like a total disgusting loser and i know that's how other people see me too so that makes me isolate myself which makes me miss out on even more. it's a fucked up vicious cycle. i don't really do anything, i don't even clean the house or take care of myself, just rot in bed. i can't really pinpoint when i fell behind but i feel like i'm too far behind to catch up. so my only option is ctb. our experiences might not be exactly the same but i'm really sorry you're going through something similar. it's a shitty feeling to know what you're missing out on but also be unable to do anything about it.

 

[veryhappyhuman]

Relatable. I already FOMO'ed my way out of 2 ctb attempts about a decade ago, but now I'm old enough to not care about missing out anymore. At some point in life, I just realized I cannot miss out on something I had zero chance of getting anyway.

 

[demuic]

For me, I don't have any interest in anything anymore. But anything involving socializing or dealing with people is not fun for me. Whenever I tried to do anything social wise it ended in failure and embarrassment. Getting drunk doesn't appeal to me, parties invoke a sense of terror, having someone to talk to can be nice but I do that 100% online now, a relationship won't work out for me, etc. In short, I don't necessarily feel like I'm missing out because a lot of things are not attainable for me or not things I desire anyway.

I don't like and can't relate to most people anyway so the chances of me finding anyone I would be able to hang out with in real life has always been very slim.

 

[Spacedoutfailure_]

Unfortunately it's extremely difficult to make friends past high school. If you're in the genZ generation no one is really going to be your friend unless you have a lot of followers on social media. If you're a guy no one's gonna hang with you unless you're a TikTok star or Instagram model.

 

[orange]

I relate to some extent but honestly I'm such a huge introvert I wouldn't mind having no friends if my classmates weren't openly vitriolic aganist me lmao. How hard is it to not harass me in the fucking hallways? we're in college.

 

[Sanva]

I'm the same. It hurts so much seeing people having fun with their friends, knowing i can't have that.

 

[sharky]

Same but i would also have a fear of missing out stuff in the future when im gone. but yeah, i don't do much in my free time, at least not the things i would like to do which kinda makes me sad.

 

[Anxieyote]

Unfortunately it's extremely difficult to make friends past high school. If you're in the genZ generation no one is really going to be your friend unless you have a lot of followers on social media. If you're a guy no one's gonna hang with you unless you're a TikTok star or Instagram model.

This actually does matter more than I thought it did. I'm in my late 20's, but I work with people who are in their teens and early 20's. It's kind of like a rite of passage for them to inquire about the social media accounts of new employees who get hired.

"How many followers do you have?" is not a question that I expected to matter at all, at any point during my life, but people are actually choosing friends based on that. I told them I don't really use social media, and they talked to me a lot less after that.

And some of the numbers are crazy. One of them has 11,000 on their TikTok, another has 36,000 on theirs. There is now literal social currency in the form of these apps, and people without followers are actually feeling lesser than people who don't. I also notice that the ones with high follower counts tend to carry themselves much more confidently too. I am sure they receive a lot of validation for being paid attention to as much as they are.

 

[NotHuman]

Feels like the music stopped long ago; most found a place to sit while the unlucky few are still left standing.

I wish I had been told that college was basically my last chance to establish something of a circle to work with. Meetup, adult classes, and volunteering offer an infinite pool of acquaintances with which to exchange the standard niceties, feigned interest, and gap fillers, but it seems any vacancies for close friends and significant others have been long filled. Of course, even if they weren't they'd prefer actual humans to human impersonators.

 

[Superdeterminist]

FOMO is a real source of distress and a suicidal trigger for me. Looking at media of other people enjoying things I haven't or can't makes it spike like crazy. It's one of the reasons I don't have social media. My life is pretty uneventful and I don't want to see the lives of busy people participating in fun things, because it makes me miserable that I'm not there sharing in the enjoyment. I don't know if there's a universal remedy for it, but for me, experiencing the thing that you feel you're missing out on is the best solution for it. Then you can say you've done it and either it's disappointing and you stop feeling FOMO for that reason, or it's fun and you go back to it, if that's possible. If impossible, then that really sucks, and I have no idea what to do from there.

 

[sivvie]

I just choose to believe/think there's an afterlife where I'll get to do whatever I want and live how I want with a universe that's to my own rules.

I don't actually have a solid belief on whether there's an afterlife or not, i'm okay with nothingness after death because I won't experience it anyway. It's just nice to imagine and drift away in my own fantasies :) It makes death something to look forward to, and at least I won't know if there is anything unless I'm proven wrong.

 

[Spacedoutfailure_]

This actually does matter more than I thought it did. I'm in my late 20's, but I work with people who are in their teens and early 20's. It's kind of like a rite of passage for them to inquire about the social media accounts of new employees who get hired.

"How many followers do you have?" is not a question that I expected to matter at all, at any point during my life, but people are actually choosing friends based on that. I told them I don't really use social media, and they talked to me a lot less after that.

And some of the numbers are crazy. One of them has 11,000 on their TikTok, another has 36,000 on theirs. There is now literal social currency in the form of these apps, and people without followers are actually feeling lesser than people who don't. I also notice that the ones with high follower counts tend to carry themselves much more confidently too. I am sure they receive a lot of validation for being paid attention to as much as they are.

Yep, real life is just exactly like highschool. I also work with younger and older people and the young people don't talk to me. Definitely can't put up with this much longer.

 

[Superdeterminist]

This actually does matter more than I thought it did. I'm in my late 20's, but I work with people who are in their teens and early 20's. It's kind of like a rite of passage for them to inquire about the social media accounts of new employees who get hired.

"How many followers do you have?" is not a question that I expected to matter at all, at any point during my life, but people are actually choosing friends based on that. I told them I don't really use social media, and they talked to me a lot less after that.

And some of the numbers are crazy. One of them has 11,000 on their TikTok, another has 36,000 on theirs. There is now literal social currency in the form of these apps, and people without followers are actually feeling lesser than people who don't. I also notice that the ones with high follower counts tend to carry themselves much more confidently too. I am sure they receive a lot of validation for being paid attention to as much as they are.

To be honest I think that's pretty pathetic... choosing friends based on follower counts...