Im not an impulsive person but i cant stop thinking about ctb and as i dont have any reliable method for now im constantly having impulsive thoughts about trying to ctb with terribly unreliable methods. It might sound childish but i find it so hard to not listen to these thoughts.
If anyone have the same issue, how do u deal with it ? Tysm
I used to have the same issue. It stopped after I made a ctb date and failed to keep it.
I attempted impulsively with unreliable methods about 10 times before and failed each one. I got tired of failing and decided to make a ctb date with a method that I was comfortable with.(jumping) well at least I thought I was comfortable with it.
When my ctb date approached at first all I could think about was myself falling and I was excited for it. The making of a date made me not think about doing it impulsively anymore because I was going to do it.
On the second to last day before my date however survival instincts started kicking in and I started getting panicky and felt nauseous and ended up backing out of my plan. Ever since then I don't impulsively attempt.
However my impulsivity has been replaced with cutting . I did it before but I've been doing it more often. Also ever since then life has gotten even more tiring and I want to end it but now I can't bring myself to.
