How do I do it? Please help me

[fred1]

Hi I lost my son 3 weeks ago and I need to be with him but I so frightened about it and the guilt is killing me anyway? Please someone help the pain end please
I'm new here and Iv got no idea how to even use this site, I don't know what all the abbreviations are I see a lot about sn? Im so lost without my son it's killing me please someone tell me how to go peacefully please? I can't take waking up everyday with this pain for the rest of my life please help me

 

[Death is beautiful]

Hi I lost my son 3 weeks ago and I need to be with him but I so frightened about it and the guilt is killing me anyway? Please someone help the pain end please
I'm new here and Iv got no idea how to even use this site, I don't know what all the abbreviations are I see a lot about sn? Im so lost without my son it's killing me please someone tell me how to go peacefully please? I can't take waking up everyday with this pain for the rest of my life please help me

If you have around a thousand dollars, then "N" is a good option.

 

[fred1]

If you have around a thousand dollars, then "N" is a good option.

Sorry no idea what "n" is? Money not a problem but I'm in Uk

 

[weallneedtovent]

Hi I lost my son 3 weeks ago and I need to be with him but I so frightened about it and the guilt is killing me anyway? Please someone help the pain end please
I'm new here and Iv got no idea how to even use this site, I don't know what all the abbreviations are I see a lot about sn? Im so lost without my son it's killing me please someone tell me how to go peacefully please? I can't take waking up everyday with this pain for the rest of my life please help me

The rules of the forum is that we don't tell you how to ctb,

Would suggest reading the resources and wiki pages.

 

[Death is beautiful]

Sorry no idea what "n" is? Money not a problem but I'm in Uk

N - Nembutal, in the UK it is also delivered, write to me, I will give you more information

 

[fred1]

The rules of the forum is that we don't tell you how to ctb,

Would suggest reading the resources and wiki pages.

Sorry

 

[weallneedtovent]

Find a railroad and touch the third rail, should be a painless and quick death since you get a heart attack almost instantly

Jesus hell no!

Seen some shocks of 3rd/4th, doesn't always end in death, and certainly isn't instant as it's DC.

If you're gonna go via high voltages, find a 132kv substation and touch between two isolation points, it'll evaporate you

 

[ItsTimeToExit]

Find a railroad and touch the third rail, should be a painless and quick death since you get a heart attack almost instantly

Here we go again... do you have any proof for your claims?

Direct Current (DC) is what those third rails use and you need a lot of Voltage and Current for it to become fatal. You're more likely to cook yourself to death than get a heart attack. Not painless nor quick.

Alternating Current (AC) at 60 Hz has the real possibility of messing with your heartbeat and causing cardiac arrest.

Do you want to guess what the third rails use? It's Direct Current (DC).

--

This forum section really needs a motto.

Assume nothing, question everything.

 

[logan]

Such a loss is indescribable and unbearable.

Nevertheless, you should first seek professional help and grieve.

Maybe you will find the strength to live on.

 

[fred1]

Such a loss is indescribable and unbearable.

Nevertheless, you should first seek professional help and grieve.

Maybe you will find the strength to live on.

My husband found him and the screams I heard are just unbearable then I seen him lying there dead I can't get the vision out of my head, I'm dead inside anyway and I really need this pain to stop, i tried the week it happened and failed just like I failed my son

 

[StevieNixs]

My husband found him and the screams I heard are just unbearable then I seen him lying there dead I can't get the vision out of my head, I'm dead inside anyway and I really need this pain to stop, i tried the week it happened and failed just like I failed my son

Understand your pain. My sister died a few weeks ago which is why I am on the SS site now planning to exit. Once you have posted I think it is 6 times you will be able to message people and be messaged. I've undergone counselling with Cruse. Unfortunately it did not work for me. It's helping my Mum though.

 

[dreamlessnight]

Personally, I'm against suggesting this kind of solution at the moment.

It doesn't feel right to ctb in the middle of this kind of thing. Putting this Hell to rest is going to take lots of time and effort, none of them pop results in 3 weeks. I wish there was an easy way to soothe your pain and grief, but maybe the other part of the forum, the Recovery side would be more helpful than this.

May you find peace someday, one breath at a time.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you are in so much pain, it sounds really traumatic what you are going through. Whatever happens, I hope you find some relief from your suffering.

 

[wannabesetfree]

Hey OP. Just posting to see how you're holding up. So sorry about your son. I know you're seriously hurting and I'm all for people doing what's best for them but I would never suggest spur of the moment suicides.

 

[toforigivelife]

Sorry no idea what "n" is? Money not a problem but I'm in Uk

"N" is Nembutal. I don't, however, know where you would find it or how to buy it. You'd have to start a new thread for that kind of advice.

There is always the option of purchasing Bitcoin and buying drugs like heroin (powder form, snorted and mixed with alcohol) and other powerful drugs on the online dark markets.

I cannot imagine the level of pain and anguish that you are enduring right now.

Many parents become actively suicidal after the death of a child, and I think all contemplate suicide after the death of a child.

I won't try to trot our any "seek help" advice to a person who has just suffered the profound loss that you have suffered.

(I'm not saying that seeking grief counseling, psychiatric help or going to grief support group are bad ideas. I'm sure you're aware that help is a available and don't need that kind of advice right now.)

I completely understand why you want to end your pain.

I respect everyone's right to determine their quality of life and to ultimately decide if making the decision to end their is the right decision for them.

I wish I could take your pain away or bring your son back. If I could I would bring him back in a second.

I'm not recommending death by suicide as the best answer to what you're going through, that's your journey to take and ultimately your decision.

There are options, drugs being one of them, but you have to decide for yourself.

In the meantime, I'll say prayers for you and for your late son.

I'm so sorry for your tragic loss. So very sorry.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what it must feel like. I was devastated when I lost my best friend. I have no children, though, so I have no real way of understanding how you must feel.

I hope you can find support in the people who are with you still. There are more ways to "be with" your son that joining him in death. His memory lives on in so many ways - especially in the love he gave to you. I hope that love strengthens you and provides you with comfort and clarity in these dark times.

 

[Beau]

I am so sorry you have lost your son.

I know parents that have gone through this too. It may be impossible to imagine it now, but people can and do survive the loss of a child. Please consider finding a support group with people who truly know something about what you are going through. You can always return to this site later if you need to.

 

[mandyjohnuk]

Jesus hell no!

Seen some shocks of 3rd/4th, doesn't always end in death, and certainly isn't instant as it's DC.

If you're gonna go via high voltages, find a 132kv substation and touch between two isolation points, it'll evaporate you

It's not the voltage that kills you. It's the amperage. If it DC then the amperage will be higher.

 

[fred1]

"N" is Nembutal. I don't, however, know where you would find it or how to buy it. You'd have to start a new thread for that kind of advice.

There is always the option of purchasing Bitcoin and buying drugs like heroin (powder form, snorted and mixed with alcohol) and other powerful drugs on the online dark markets.

I cannot imagine the level of pain and anguish that you are enduring right now.

Many parents become actively suicidal after the death of a child, and I think all contemplate suicide after the death of a child.

I won't try to trot our any "seek help" advice to a person who has just suffered the profound loss that you have suffered.

(I'm not saying that seeking grief counseling, psychiatric help or going to grief support group are bad ideas. I'm sure you're aware that help is a available and don't need that kind of advice right now.)

I completely understand why you want to end your pain.

I respect everyone's right to determine their quality of life and to ultimately decide if making the decision to end their is the right decision for them.

I wish I could take your pain away or bring your son back. If I could I would bring him back in a second.

I'm not recommending death by suicide as the best answer to what you're going through, that's your journey to take and ultimately your decision.

There are options, drugs being one of them, but you have to decide for yourself.

In the meantime, I'll say prayers for you and for your late son.

I'm so sorry for your tragic loss. So very sorry.

So Iv never taken drugs like heroin b4 so if I got hold of some and take it with alcohol will I just pass out would it hurt? Sorry for all the questions, I do however take morphine and I do have a tolerance to it so I can't take loads of that as the doctors will only give me a weeks worth at a time as I tried taking an overdose the week it happened but failed and just ended up in icu for 3 days so would I need to take loads of herion? Thank you for your kind words

 

[toforigivelife]

So Iv never taken drugs like heroin b4 so if I got hold of some and take it with alcohol will I just pass out would it hurt? Sorry for all the questions, I do however take morphine and I do have a tolerance to it so I can't take loads of that as the doctors will only give me a weeks worth at a time as I tried taking an overdose the week it happened but failed and just ended up in icu for 3 days so would I need to take loads of herion? Thank you for your kind words

You're very welcome. And, again, my deepest condolences on the loss of your beloved son.

I'm surprised that further psychiatric treatment wasn't offered after your overdose. I'm surprised that you didn't spend some time in a psychiatric hospital setting after your attempt.

Not that a psychiatric hospital would've helped your grief but I would think that doctors would've thought it too risky to just send you home, given the level of pain and you are dealing with and your state of mind.

If you're familiar with morphine then you are familiar with opiates and have an idea of what effect heroin would have on you.

A week's worth of morphine mixed with heroin and alcohol and 24 hours of uninterrupted time after you take the mix might get you the results you are looking for.

Would you need to take loads of heroin? You may have to take a certain amount given that your body is used to morphine, but you'll have to do your research.

Again, ultimately this is your journey and ultimately your decision.

Sometimes just knowing the option to die can give an anguished person some peace of mind. Or, in your case, a faint peace of mind.

I hope that you will look into counseling and grief support before you come to a final decision.

Sometimes having people who can relate to your loss and having a sense of love, support, understanding can help alleviate what you are dealing with and give you some time to decide whether you want to carry on or if you think ending your pain and life is what's best for you.

If you feel that you're able to, I hope you will give yourself a chance before coming to a decision that you feel is best for you.



https://www.sciencenews.org/article/opioid-crisis-overdose-death

How Much Heroin Does It Take to Overdose | Heroin Rehab Centers

How much heroin does it take to overdose? What are the most common heroin overdose symptoms? Call 866.514.0275 for help today.

www.sanantoniorecoverycenter.com

 

[Peel_the_Banana]

So Iv never taken drugs like heroin b4 so if I got hold of some and take it with alcohol will I just pass out would it hurt? Sorry for all the questions, I do however take morphine and I do have a tolerance to it so I can't take loads of that as the doctors will only give me a weeks worth at a time as I tried taking an overdose the week it happened but failed and just ended up in icu for 3 days so would I need to take loads of herion? Thank you for your kind words

I'm sorry about your son. You should probably take some time to grieve. CTB could be a hasty decision in your case.


There is a search functionality. A lot of things you are asking and may ask in the future have been discussed in great detail in the past. It is recommended that you use that and / or the resources for your research.

If you believe that CTB is the only decision for you then you should invest your time and energy into acquiring that goal rather than asking everyone else all the details of what you should do and how you should do it. If you have questions about what you find then of course posting a more specific inquiry can be addressed at that time.

 

[AnotherTragicName]

I can kinda imagine what you are going through, since I lost my sister 5 years ago, living with my parents back then, I saw my mother being devestated to death every day for a long while. She was her favorite child and in general her children are everything to her.

Still, she managed to come out. And so I am convinced that you can aswell. As much as it might suck, it's only 3 weeks now. It might take a couple of months. But tragedy is really no reason to throw your life away. Let life test you, you will get out of it stronger.

Look for professional help, it can really go a long way. I would suggest that to ANYONE, who isn't in a truely hopeless situation/ how isn't fighting for a long time already. Suicidal thoughts can arrise in the course of a life. And so, they might pass. Even if it really doesn't feel like it in this very moment. Give it time.

 

[fred1]

You're very welcome. And, again, my deepest condolences on the loss of your beloved son.

I'm surprised that further psychiatric treatment wasn't offered after your overdose. I'm surprised that you didn't spend some time in a psychiatric hospital setting after your attempt.

Not that a psychiatric hospital would've helped your grief but I would think that doctors would've thought it too risky to just send you home, given the level of pain and you are dealing with and your state of mind.

If you're familiar with morphine then you are familiar with opiates and have an idea of what effect heroin would have on you.

A week's worth of morphine mixed with heroin and alcohol and 24 hours of uninterrupted time after you take the mix might get you the results you are looking for.

Would you need to take loads of heroin? You may have to take a certain amount given that your body is used to morphine, but you'll have to do your research.

Again, ultimately this is your journey and ultimately your decision.

Sometimes just knowing the option to die can give an anguished person some peace of mind. Or, in your case, a faint peace of mind.

I hope that you will look into counseling and grief support before you come to a final decision.

Sometimes having people who can relate to your loss and having a sense of love, support, understanding can help alleviate what you are dealing with and give you some time to decide whether you want to carry on or if you think ending your pain and life is what's best for you.

If you feel that you're able to, I hope you will give yourself a chance before coming to a decision that you feel is best for you.



https://www.sciencenews.org/article/opioid-crisis-overdose-death

How Much Heroin Does It Take to Overdose | Heroin Rehab Centers

How much heroin does it take to overdose? What are the most common heroin overdose symptoms? Call 866.514.0275 for help today.

www.sanantoniorecoverycenter.com

Thanks again, I got up today and watched for a while all the people getting on with live and boy did it make me so angry I did some really stupid shit! I filled my car with fuel and drove off without paying then I got a spray can of bright green paint and covered a police car in it! Oh yes then got arrested but because they new my situation they let me off! all I wanted them to do was punish me for my failure with my son! Looks like I need to do something more serious to get thrown in a cell!

 

[Brokensaddle]

Thanks again, I got up today and watched for a while all the people getting on with live and boy did it make me so angry I did some really stupid shit! I filled my car with fuel and drove off without paying then I got a spray can of bright green paint and covered a police car in it! Oh yes then got arrested but because they new my situation they let me off! all I wanted them to do was punish me for my failure with my son! Looks like I need to do something more serious to get thrown in a cel

I'm really sorry about your day. I just want pass on my condolences to you about your son. It's obviously that your hurting and in pain. I hope your strong enough to reach out to help. Try speaking to your gp or at least a charity that deals with grief counselling. I don't want you to make a rash decision with talking the time to understand and think about what your going to do. I'm not close to my family as they are abusive and still tell to ctb and I have few friends in real life. I was close to my dad and when he dead it hit me hard and I do understand the pain of losing a loved one. I'm sure you have family and friends and they will be hurt if something bad happened to you. Take care of yourself.

 

[Beau]

Thanks again, I got up today and watched for a while all the people getting on with live and boy did it make me so angry I did some really stupid shit! I filled my car with fuel and drove off without paying then I got a spray can of bright green paint and covered a police car in it! Oh yes then got arrested but because they new my situation they let me off! all I wanted them to do was punish me for my failure with my son! Looks like I need to do something more serious to get thrown in a cell!

I am so very sorry you are grieving like this.

There is a group called The Compassionate Friends that helps parents who have lost a child. You can call them, they have online support, and local chapters in the U.S. and other countries. You can do an online search for "The Compassionate Friends" and find out how to reach out to them.