How did you first hear about / find your way to SanctionedSuicide? (2nd poll)

[LostInTheWoods]

I heard of it first the last july and i can't believe that such a cool and useful site is so easy to find, if i would have discovered it like 5 years ago i would have saved me a lot of suffering

 

[Division Day]

I found it yesterday while trying to find out if a website selling N was for real. And this site told me that unfortunately it wasn't. I really wish I'd found this back when N and SN were more available. I'd never heard of them before and now it seems like they're impossible to get.

 

[One Day At A Time]

I have searched online many times about suicide methods and never came across this website. However the recent BBC article made me search for forums instead of a generic search for methods. I never thought of looking to forums until I read the news story.

 

[Ironweed]

I've been around so long I was on the now banned subreddit.

 

[flower_g1rl]

I've been around so long I was on the now banned subreddit.

same, im here from r/sasu

 

[rainyraes]

I don't think tantacrul or any news outlets realise the more publicity they bring to this site, the more people who will join it - it does the opposite of what they want to happen to this site

 

[wiinterfrost]

I was searching up methods and found the New York Times article

that is exactly how it was for me too.

 

[Victim.Of.Life]

At first I was active on the subreddit 'suicidewatch'. But eventually i went looking on the internet for a forum where you can be a bit more open and honest, and I found SS.

 

[snowcloud9]

I'm surprised not many people heard about it from a friend. My friend had a mental breakdown and started talking about "SWB" and other weird acronyms and the first site that popped up for "SWB" is this one.

 

[BlockHammer]

Im trying to find some suicide related discussion on youtube,then tantacrul video just pop up in my recomendation

 

[betternever2havbeen]

Googling a method and somehow came across a thread that was from here. I've been suicidal and googled methods on and off for years when at my worst but I was finally doing a bit better-hence why I didn't find this forum til last year. I know I was still passively suicidal just wasn't googling methods as I didn't wanna do it whilst my elderly grandmother was still alive. Now I'm in a pretty bad place again (worst ever) but this site has been such a huge support and it means I don't have to go through it all alone (if I do CTB) and I was able to switch methods to a more peaceful one so I'll be forever grateful for that as well.

 

[passivethought121]

Found it within the first page of google while looking for methods.

 

[TAW122]

As a veteran of SaSu, I first learned about SaSu way back in 2018, when I was once active on Reddit's subreddit SanctionedSuicide and TrueSanctionedSuicide before the admins on Reddit banned it. It was only a few days afterwards that SaSu (this forum) was founded and formed, but I didn't join until a few months later. I hung around an alternative subreddit named TimeToGo (has been in quarantined since late 2019 or so) for a few months before making an account and joining SaSu here.

 

[LonelyPlanetBoy]

I think I was looking for methods and somehow found out about sn. Then I got a reference that it was discussed on here. Also about the PPH but I can't tell which one was first actually.

 

[lalius]

Quite interesting almost half the voters came after tantacruls' video. It would be interesting to know if these voters are interested in ctb or not statistically speaking. I see a lot of people telling they got it from yt recommendation which is double interesting as it shows a hole in the platform algorithm aimed to prevent ctb.

 

[stillvoices]

I was searching for ways. But I don't think I was comprehending. I wasn't finding what I was looking for but did come across the name of this site and for some reason thought it was something to prevent lol. Wasn't till I saw a news article about a forum (that I was trying to find) that it all clicked. Coulda smacked myself in the head for that lol.

 

[Wopnik_Yas]

Was searching more about SN or ODing on Zoplicone and it came up on google. Couldnt acess the site using normal search engines so used Puffin to access it.

 

[tsumihoroboshi]

I was searching for methods and got annoyed by all the "there's help out there!" website and numbers they throw at me, and instead tried searching for something that weren't so anti-suicidal thoughts. I then found an article about someone ctb and it was related to this website. I don't remember the article name or anything or who the person was, but it was very negative and critical of the site, and I always like to see both sides so I checked out this "evil" website and found it wasn't at all like the article made it seem.

 

[Ammended]

I was looking for a non judgemental forum to talk openly and came across the Times article. I read for a few days and then joined.

 

[ThanatopicFugue]

The YouTube algorithm recommended me Tantacrul's video one day, and I decided to check it out. I read some posts and related to them, saw that a lot of what Tantacrul said wasn't very accurate at all, and decided to stay for a bit.

 

[Cherry Crumpet]

I was a member of the OG sub on Reddit before the asshole site admins banned it. I've been around for a long time. My mood ebbs and flows. I'm not actively suicidal, but having the option to just call it quits gives me a lot of comfort. Like, if it ever gets to the point where there's nothing left for me, I can leave on my own terms.

Ironically, having access to a forum like this makes me feel *less* desire to cbt. If I can come up with a plan (have a few), have a place that has reputable information on how to carry out that plan, it becomes a safety net for me.

I hope that makes sense. I was feeling really down today and took some (rx) xanax (prescribed amount, not abusing it - although I have in the past). So I might be kinda rambly right now lol

I have seen posts where the people responding have looked at why the OP wants to do it and seen it as not thoughtfully planned out but an impulsive and rash decision being made in the heat of the moment. The responders often try to gently nudge the OP to just try staying a few days and to come back to the reasons why they want to CBT when they are calmer and less rash and are able to think clearly and calmly about the seriousness of what they are about to do.

That is what I like the most about this forum. Ignorant news orgs and youtubers paint the people here as frothing at the mouth, getting off to the idea of egging some vulnerable person into suicide, but I've found it's the opposite. Most super rash impulsive posts are met with responders trying to calm the OP down, not saying 'yeah, do it right now!'

Of course, there are many goodbye threads where the users here know the context of the person saying goodbye, and understand why they have reached the decision they have made, and these goodbye threads usually have the op acting very calmly and rationally. These threads are met with well wishes, sympathy, support, empathy and love.

This is the SaSu site and the people on it that I know. Ignorant people that pop in for 10 mins, skim quickly, and then jump to the conclusion that everyone here always 100% supports suicide fucking pisses me off. Because the people here don't. Well, some do... but most people here understand the pain their fellow members are going through, and also understand that while there are many legitimate reasons to CBT, doing it in the heat of the moment when you are upset, not thinking clearly, and acting impulsively, is not a good time to attempt to CBT.

Sorry this turned into a damn novel. I think the Xanax kicked in. My mood is better now. Sorry for spilling my whole damn life story LOL

 

[Blurry_Buildings]

The New York times is a source of hard-hitting and *mildly* biased journalism that we all need in our lives. They delve into topics no one else is willing to explore and for that I give them my praise. Whether it is novel solutions to the homelessness crisis in America or international relations with Singapore amidst the ever increasing regional tension, I will be there to abuse their paywall and read their articles for free. o7

(y'know, for however much longer I've got)

 

[zel]

The New York times is a source of hard-hitting and *mildly* biased journalism that we all need in our lives. They delve into topics no one else is willing to explore and for that I give them my praise. Whether it is novel solutions to the homelessness crisis in America or international relations with Singapore amidst the ever increasing regional tension, I will be there to abuse their paywall and read their articles for free. o7

(y'know, for however much longer I've got)

Mildly? And do we really need them in our lives?

 

[Houkki6404]

Ngl tantacrul's video
I mean, he made that video to prevent people from joining but that actually made me want to join soo
I don't think that worked

 

[cultpup]

I googled "pro-suicide forum" and came across an article about a site not mentioned in the article by name, but which I assume was this one. So then, I searched Duckduckgo with the same term, since the results there are less filtered, and came across this site.

literally exact same answer from me, word by word

 

[Smelly_ballz]

I got tired of all the platitudes and insincerity of r/suicidewatch. They also don't allow me to fully be open about how I feel, much like real life. So I looked up "pro suicide"

 

[Strawberry Moon]

The owners name was mentioned in a news article that I stumbled across online. A quick Google search and here I am.

 

[Life Is My Coffin]

I love how the poll shows the majority of people found this place cuz of Tantacrul's video (myslef included) even though the idiot tried his best to censor every last aspect of what the website is (including what it's called) and tried his damndest to make this forum look like the most horrible place imaginable where everyone tells each other to kill themselves I've never seen a bigger fucking retard with a multi-million viewed video before

 

[Life Is My Coffin]

I've had some friends talk about this site. We sort of have an understanding that if any of us suddenly disappear we'll know why.

Is this you and your friends?

 

[Kobusu]

Method research for me, but I've talked about that before. So many new faces from the bbc and tantacrul though wow.