How did people react when you told them you were suicidal?

[ForgottenTomb]

Have you told someone you wanted to die? Like a friend, family member, partner, acquaintance etc.? How did they react? Were they supportive or dismissive?

 

[UKscotty]

People generally want us to be happy and experience content life is my experience.

The problem is they can't really help so we just become a liability and a burden. In my experience they distance themselves.

Now days I have learnt not to tell anyone.

 

[du2497]

Dismissive all around generally, stepfather basically got mad at me last time I told him how I was actually doing (it's a big mystery why I don't talk to him about mental issues), when I tell my mother she sort of understands sometimes, but will mostly blame it on weather, or tell me to take my anti-anxiety medication or generic platitudes. I'd be lying if I said it didn't contribute to wanting to CTB. One friend gets it somewhat, but another one just ignores it, or says its "the easy way out". Meh.

 

[Hunter2005]

I wouldn't tell anyone to be honest, it also makes it much easier to do it.

 

[Valso]

I've never told anyone directly, like "I intend to kill myself". I only hinted it but people are generally too dumb to understand that hint.

 

[wiinterfrost]

yeah i've told people before.
it went bad and i lost literally all people i was speaking to. i was completely alone for over a year.

but recently... i told two people again and they both respected my autonomy after i made sure to say it's my choice and nobody else's and forcing me to live would be very selfish and harming me more. they are afraid and hurt, but they understand.

 

[tronix]

I shared this in the past with others. They were worried and afraid. I will not do this ever again. I didn't want to make them feel that way.

 

[wCvML2]

Neither supportive nor dismissive. They didn't know how to deal with it, so the only thing they could do was give me away to a psych ward, and nothing changed after that. Suicidal tendencies are a lot more complicated than hunger or thirst; most people don't know how to help, and sometimes they make the situation unintentionally worse while wanting to help.

 

[minusgrader]

I've hinted at it to a few people, like jokes or expressions of hopelessness, but no reactions. I straight up did tell someone I was suicidal. Also no reaction, just some judgement. I don't know what to think about it. I think I wanted that person so offer me support, but at the same time i'm relieved she didn't because now i'm free to ctb without interference. But I thought she cared about me more. Knowing now that she doesn't made me sad.

 

[divinemistress36]

Got put in psych ward a few times and fried my brain with electro shock therapy

 

[3/4Dead]

Varied responses, man. I spent all of high school (only graduated in recent years, for context) openly talking about my plans to die. During my freshman year I expected someone to do or say something, but no one really did so I just became so much less cagey talking about it. It would come up in conversation for me at any given time "Maybe i'd do that in twenty years, but I also expect to commit suicide wtihin twenty years"

I thought people didn't take me seriously about it, then realized they understood and I guess just didn't care lol. I think it's also because, like someone else said, suicidal ideation is so complicated many people just don't know what to do with it.

I had one of my friends try to talk me out of it (ineffective), one just tells me that it would hurt him but that if I do it it's my choice (effective in postponing), another ignores it, my mother said I'm selfish and doesn't believe that I'm serious, but the craziest probably was that my sister didn't really respond she just got upset that I told her at all, because I could've caused her to have a panic attack or something. She was the first person I told, so (I was thirteen or something, too)

 

[chronicdissosiation]

most people dont care
but its fine
it just gives me more incentive to follow through with it

 

[EternalShore]

most people dont care
but its fine
it just gives me more incentive to follow through with it

It's unfortunate tbh~ :( They only care about themselves not feeling bad for having killed someone~ They don't care about the person involved at all! :( They're sick tbh~ :(

 

[wildflowers1996]

I told my ex best friend she didn't care in the slightest

 

[chronicdissosiation]

It's unfortunate tbh~ :( They only care about themselves not feeling bad for having killed someone~ They don't care about the person involved at all! :( They're sick tbh~ :(

yeah…my mother showed genuine concern for two weeks before deciding that her drugs were more important
my friends dont really check up and its fine
i know they have other things to do and i dislike feeling like a nuisance
at least i have access to thc :) its fried my brain but hey it helps

 

[BlendedHeart]

I told a college friend who also has had mental issues, thinking she was going to understand me. I thought she was the Pam to my Jim (If you have seen The Office), but she turned out to be Angela, and stopped talking to me altogether. I kinda miss her, even if we had a weird relationship.

 

[penguinl0v3s]

Have you told someone you wanted to die? Like a friend, family member, partner, acquaintance etc.? How did they react? Were they supportive or dismissive?

Umm in my experience people overreact if you tell them you're suicidal, like sometimes they will act as if you're killing yourself in that moment and it is just super fucking annoying.

 

[halleyscomet]

when i was about 8 i showed a lot of suicidal behaviour. i would write suicide notes and give them to my parents. when i first tried to kill myself at the age of 9 my parents witnessed it, they laughed didn't really care.

people at least for me either brush it off as a dark joke or don't care. i've had multiple people tell me they wished i would just die already and put myself out of my misery.

people are selfish, it's very rare to find one who isn't. people tend to only be concerned about what effects them. they either don't care or beg you to live, not because they care - but because they don't want to deal with the guilt of you dying.

i'd do anything for someone to just give me a hug imo, that's all i want when i tell people tbh.

 

[ForgottenTomb]

These responses are shocking and so sad. Why do so few people care that you're suffering like this? I thought people took suicide really seriously, but that might just be virtue signaling and nothing meaningful.

 

[NSA]

I've hinted at it to varying degrees of obviousness over the years. If they care they don't know what to do with it so just blow it off or ignore it. It's a nice thought to think they'll care when I'm dead, if only because they'll have to foot my 1/3 of the bills then.
Sucks to think of what will happen to my stuff though. Unlike my family, I like my stuff.

when i was about 8 i showed a lot of suicidal behaviour. i would write suicide notes and give them to my parents. when i first tried to kill myself at the age of 9 my parents witnessed it, they laughed didn't really care.

people at least for me either brush it off as a dark joke or don't care. i've had multiple people tell me they wished i would just die already and put myself out of my misery.

people are selfish, it's very rare to find one who isn't. people tend to only be concerned about what effects them. they either don't care or beg you to live, not because they care - but because they don't want to deal with the guilt of you dying.

i'd do anything for someone to just give me a hug imo, that's all i want when i tell people tbh.

People don't give kids enough credit. It's like they turn 18 and forget what they were like.

 

[vitbar]

One person I told has been there himself plenty of times. He wanted me to try therapy and other treatments before I gave up on living. He encouraged me to talk with my doctor. I did and it has been helpful. Mostly the medication, but the therapy too if less. He was pushy, but I appreciated it, still do.

I've told a handful of people on helplines and mostly got simple advice. They seemed relaxed. I suppose they hear it a lot.

My doctor was all "that's not good" lets give you some medication. He was similar to my friend in that he was relatively pushy and straightforward.

I got a couple of telephone psych evaluations and one of them told me I should refuse to see it as an option, that even accepting the posibility "lets it in". I argued briefly before giving up.

 

[melancholia_melodia]

The toxic ones make fun of me or just don't care, but those who are my acquaintances and friends, they worry about me and they try their best to help me

 

[dinosavr]

Talking about suicidal ideation to my therapist is really relieving for me. Before I kept it all in my head or here (which is basically just like the extended version of head lol, this site doesn't have a lot to do with the actual society with people who value and appreciate life and consider death as something bad, which completely changes the perspective).
She is genuinely sorry, she always gives me this "that's so sad" look which makes me feel like what I experience is a lot and it's valid. Cause here sometimes I feel like a fraud- so many people suffer more, why would I even want to die?
But telling it to anyone who doesn't have psychological knowledge and who would simply be overwhelmed by that, is not a real option to me. I wouldn't expect any kind of good reaction because how on earth can people react well when suicide is so taboo they never even think about it. It has to be somewhat devastating for normies lol. It's not that I care for them so much but still, I wouldn't want to be the reason of somebody else's suffering, ever

 

[astonishedturnip]

My parents were wigged out and finally encouraged me to start therapy/antidepressants after years of mocking the very idea of them (I hadn't let on to my suicidal thoughts before then). Therapy didn't help but antidepressants did. (Though not fully since I'm still here lol) They're good parents and they were worried about me, and checked in on me for a while after that. They've stopped, probably hoping it's all resolved now, and I don't have the heart to tell them that I will still CTB when they pass, the antidepressants just stopped me from wanting to do it NOW.

My siblings were kind of supportive but mostly made it about them and how sad they would be, etc., which kind of rang hollow to me because once they moved out they kind of forgot about me. Even their talk with me felt more like an excuse for them to stroke their own egos and parrot mental health platitudes they found on Twitter (they're big lefties and all about therapyspeak). It was nice of them to at least feel worried ig? I still think they'll be fine once I CTB tbh so I'm not that worried.

My friends found it awkward and tried to move the conversation away as quickly as possible. I'll only mention it briefly now and they just kind of deflect it hurriedly. I've never had an honest conversation about CTBing with my friends, it just freaks them out. Especially since ironically, I'm considered the "stable mom friend" and it probably unnerved them to see that kind of a role reversal where I was the one needing help.

 

[Ash]

Most people have tried to be supportive. Funnily enough, the strongest "no don't do that" reaction I received was from other patients on the ward

 

[junko]

Have never gotten support or kindness. Am genuinely happy for others who have.

Have only gotten yelled at. Accused of seeking attention. Accused of worse. Have not been told to "just do it already" yet, but feel it coming on. Am not telling anyone this time besides this forum.

 

[Kurai]

I've told my parents. I was going through a very depressive episode, they were slightly worried but told me that's it's temporary as if was a joke. They yelled at me and told me to just keep busy and to never speak of it again. I'm already on antidepressants, I still want to die.