Discussion how come i get bouts of feeling ok for a tiny bit before falling back into depression how do i catch myself in a bad spot so i just do it

[Corpse_in_a_dress]

does this happen to anyone else

 

[Mr2005]

No I never feel ok so if you do you should be figuring out why and how to keep it going

 

[Corpse_in_a_dress]

i cant ive never been able too it feels like the worlds taunting me with that tiny bit of happiness

 

[PeacefulTonic]

We can't encourage you or tell you when exactly is the best time to do it. You have to figure that out on your own. If you're feeling okay sometimes, perhaps there is a bit of hope in your life after all

 

[44nutz1977]

My bigest drops usually come after i feel OK and have clarity.... so I tend to worry when i get happy..

Vicious circle. Anxious about breaking and being anxious.

 

[ChobaniFlipSmores]

Yes. Which is why I've just decided to keep all my materials and plans ready for use since I seem to be doing okay from a short to medium term perspective. I know things are going to be super bad again, if not soon than months or years from now. I think I'll make this a topic of discussion for my therapy session next week "I am okay right now, but when the next thing that is bad happens and life crashes I'll be ready to CTB and that's okay because I've already decided CTB is acceptable to me. What does that mean?"

 

[NotStrongEnough]

I've read more than once that sometimes, people will actually CTB when they're happy because they know how deep the depths go and they don't want to fall into that again. I've been there more than once.

 

[BeautifulMosaics]

"how do i catch myself in a bad spot so i just do it"​

I completely understand. I haven't been taking my meds consistently and have been feeling low and anxious recently. I also had the thought today "I hope I get to a bad place where it overrides my hope so I can just do it". It's funny cause I've been through worse in life but am only thinking of actually ctb now when things are generally better - cause you know that the negatives generally dictate over the positives and the happiness is fleeting. In regards to your question - I don't know, still tryna figure that out myself.

 

[motel rooms]

"how come i get bouts of feeling ok for a tiny bit"​

@Corpse_in_a_dress What do you mean by "a tiny bit"? A couple of hours, half a day, an entire day, a couple of days?

 

[existtosuffer]

does this happen to anyone else

Yes. I have Bipolar type 2.

The parts where you feel normal & functional is hypomania.

I haven't left bed all day.

 

[Corpse_in_a_dress]

"how come i get bouts of feeling ok for a tiny bit"

@Corpse_in_a_dress What do you mean by "a tiny bit"? A couple of hours, half a day, an entire day, a couple of days?

I feel ok for half a day before falling back into depression

"how come i get bouts of feeling ok for a tiny bit"

@Corpse_in_a_dress What do you mean by "a tiny bit"? A couple of hours, half a day, an entire day, a couple of days?

I feel ok for half a day before falling back into depression

 

[Passersby]

I know what you mean. I'm never really ok either since Im constantly managing problems that create distress and make it not ok like you said. So its constant torture. Sometimes more sometimes a little less because maybe that day i am fighting really hard and have the mind and muscles to fight more But still being tortured.

The depression is always there with me too. It fluctuates some but always there. Some things make it worse for sure. Nothing makes it better since a lot of mine was inherited from the beginning and now also a lot of new factors that make it worse. I hope you can find some peace.

 

[jc58]

I do have a happy moment occasionally. Before I know it, depression & severe anxiety take over. I'm 60 years old, & as far back as I remember life has always been this way.

 

[bennay]

Question: Do your moments of feeling "ok" happen when you think about ctb or in times when you're content with that outcome or know for sure that's what you want to do?

 

[FuneralCry]

I never feel okay, all I want is to not exist. I want nothing to do with life. I can imagine it must be tiring to experience the change in emotions. I also think that in regards to wanting to ctb, you will know if/when it is the right time, it is a feeling deep down that you know it is time to leave and you have no more doubts. Anyway, I hope you find peace whatever happens.

 

[meetapple]

Nobody is happy all the time. The perseverance needed to get through life is tremendous even more so for people with issues. If your depression makes life not worth fighting for than you should examine it carefully. If you come to the conclusion that your depression is too awful then weigh that in your decision.