Discussion How can you get a child?

[pssysteff]

Knowing about the fact that
people hate people, how can you think of getting a kid?

Are all parents completely nuts and evil?

 

[foxdie]

I totally get your sentiment but it's purely biological. Same reason we can't ctb due to our SI. It shit all around...

 

[Ghost2211]

My children are loved, valued, respected, and live an upper middle class life. I don't beat them or berate them. I hug them and tell them I love them every day. I'm depressed and get over stimulated easily, but I do my best every day and manage to not kill myself despite my urges.

Tell me what I'm doing that is "evil"

 

[pssysteff]

My children are loved, valued, respected, and live an upper middle class life. I don't best them or berate them. I hug them and tell them I love them every day. I'm depressed and get over stimulated easily, but I do my best every day and manage to not kill myself despite my urges.

Tell me what I'm doing that is "evil"

You brought them here, that's evil.

Doesn't matter how much you supposedly "care "for them because I can argue that's also selfish. Which it is.
It gives you comfort in having to care for them. Comfort knowing they might be there when you die etc.

Parents have all uses for their kids.
In the US, there is a poor area where parents are known to prostitute their kids for dope.

 

[foxdie]

You brought them here, that's evil.

Doesn't matter how much you supposedly "care "for them because I can argue that's also selfish. Which it is.

I may have misunderstood how passionately you felt about this. Having children is value neutral. Is the sun evil because it allows us to live?

 

[bigdog]

My parents are complete idiots especially my father now after he died the rest of my family feed me bullshit about inheritance
Basically all my life I was like a punch bag for this morons

 

[dec132013]

Some view life differently and have hope for this world. I'm not one of those people but I wouldn't say they're evil, they likely don't even think of the possibility of the kid hating existence

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

What's going on? I could be wrong, but I get the impression that you posted to discharge some uncomfortable feelings like pain? Feeling betrayed or screwed over? Needing to blame to feel empowered in response to how you've been hurt?

What's up? We'll listen. Lots of compassion and empathy available here.

 

[Ghost2211]

You brought them here, that's evil.

Doesn't matter how much you supposedly "care "for them because I can argue that's also selfish. Which it is.
It gives you comfort in having to care for them. Comfort knowing they might be there when you die etc.

Parents have all uses for their kids.
In the US, there is a poor area where parents are known to prostitute their kids for dope.

I can see your parents were not good to you, but not all parents are bad.

 

[theguineapigking]

You should check out the antinatalism subreddit(Reddit.com). This is a complex and philosophical subject. Bringing people into this world is something that some deep thinkers believe is immoral. Other people think it is beautiful. I won't state my beliefs so that I'm not belittled and bashed at by anyone, because I don't feel like dealing with that, but I do understand how you feel. Try to remember that it appears to be a biological instinct to have kids. People don't generally think it through(shitty parents included).

This universe is definitely very immoral in many ways(setting deep philosophical possibilities aside, such as coming here to learn spiritually). You can't consent to being born. You're born a helpless baby. You can pass on medical issues like migraines to your kids(hey, that's me!..I'm the kid). It's just all over the place, you know? People can get pregnant so easily. The drive to do so is just too strong for most people. Sadly, there is no way to morally overcome this. It's all just way, way too complex.

What I will say is that if people are going to be forced into this world, they should be allowed to leave it too, painlessly.

 

[Nature_is_God]

The fact that everyone on here had the chance to never be born and to never face the predicament we all face now, is a testament to why I'm an anti-natalist.

However, I definitely think there are good-hearted parents. I just wish they would chosen a different path.

 

[Meditation guide]

You brought them here, that's evil.

So that means your are pro choice for legal abortion. You either bring them here or you decide not to right?

Some poor girls and women do not have money or access to abortions and got pregnant without intending to. So they brought kids here because they had no choice.

People are gonna have unprotected sex no matter what so that excuse to use birth control really doesn't work for lots of people. Girls and women are going to become pregnant no matter what. What then?

 

[pssysteff]

So that means your are pro choice for legal abortion. You either bring them here or you decide not to right?

Some poor girls and women do not have money or access to abortions and got pregnant without intending to. So they brought kids here because they had no choice.

People are gonna have unprotected sex no matter what so that excuse to use birth control really doesn't work for lots of people.

There is always a choice.

 

[Meditation guide]

[

There is always a choice.

Only if abortion is legal and available. Sorry to burst your bubble but we women do get pregnant without intending to. If you can't afford an abortion or don't have a clinic available no you do not have any choice, you are going to have a baby. So I assume you are in a lucky position to have both the funds and the clinic available to you.

How do people think you have a choice? If you have sex, no condom or birth contral that WORKS every time, you are probably going to get pregnant if you are fertile.

 

[Stick]

For most people, wanting to have children is such an intense desire, and for some it is what they live for. Most parents, I think, are not properly prepared to have a child. It's selfish. But it's selfish in the same way CTB is selfish, and yet, all of us are here with that desire. It's an inescapable need for some. It isn't evil.

There is always a choice.

But that choice may not be realistic. Besides, it's a gamble. We here are unlucky but honestly, chances are that if someone wants to have a child that baby is going to have a wonderful life. Most parents are trying their best to provide that life for them.

 

[Nature_is_God]

[

Only if abortion is legal and available. Sorry to burst your bubble but we women do get pregnant without intending to. If you can't afford an abortion or don't have a clinic available no you do not have any choice, you are going to have a baby. So I assume you are in a lucky position to have both the funds and the clinic available to you.

How do people think you have a choice? If you have sex, no condom or birth contral that WORKS every time, you are probably going to get pregnant if you are fertile.

I don't want to come off as if I disagree with you because I don't. However, it's just as easy to have a child unintentionally because of the lack of protection, as it is to be abstinent. I'm not one to say that people that have no access to protection shouldn't have sex but what is having temporary pleasure compared to creating a new being capable of great suffering?

 

[Life sucks]

The problem most people don't see isn't their own children but how their children can have children and so on. All of whats happening to the 7 billion is because of a less amount of people. One might give the child a relatively better life but can't give hundreds and thousands of possible descendants the same life.

 

[Ghost2211]

There is always a choice.

What do you expect women in third world countries that were raped to do?

 

[Meditation guide]

it's just as easy to have a child unintentionally because of the lack of protection, as it is to be abstinent.

Are you saying it's easy to be abstinent? Sorry I guess I didn't understand what you meant. You seem way too intelligent to suggest people can willingly be abstinent.

People seem to have sex, a lot, and it's not exactly a new thing. Nature makes it a priority.

I am so sorry to say this but I consider people who tell others to not have sex delusional. I don't mean you I mean in general.

 

[foxdie]

There is always a choice.

Does the cat choose to have a litter it can't support in winter? No. It's instinctual. Evolution would fall apart if it was a choice and we'd never be here but in the first place.

 

[Nature_is_God]

Are you saying it's easy to be abstinent? Sorry I guess I didn't understand what you meant. You seem way too intelligent to suggest people can willingly be abstinent.

Why can't they be willingly abstinent?

I'd do anything in my power to make sure I don't unnecessarily add suffering to the world.

Edit: sorry I fucked up some stuff

 

[Ghost2211]

Two things you can't take from humans.... Sex and alcohol. Yeah, we can live without them, but most people won't.

 

[Nature_is_God]

I am so sorry to say this but I consider people who tell others to not have sex delusional. I don't mean you I mean in general.

I never said that people shouldn't have sex, rather just to weigh their options of having sex or not having a kid. If they can't resist the urge of temporary pleasure, like many, then they made their decision. I'm not saying they're bad for their decision either, only natural.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Damn. I thought this thread was going to be an instruction on how to get children like by adopting them or something. Instead it's another antinatalist thread.

I can see why some people might believe in it but I feel like these discussion points should be on the rules, FAQ, or something at this point because we get this kind of thread so often. Something that says something like antinatalism is fine to believe in but there's no need to be so aggressive against actual parents since so many people here are parents themselves, some of whom are suicidal exactly because they had their kids taken from them so maybe it's a little rude to call them selfish for it no matter how true it may be? Maybe we'd also need another addendum saying that the desire to bear children is such a prevalent instinct that not everyone can be so "lucky" to have overcome it. Just a half suggestion. At least this way we wouldn't have this thread so often.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Damn. I thought this thread was going to be an instruction on how to get children like by adopting them or something. Instead it's another antinatalist thread.

Every time I see the thread title I think, "Kidnapping?"

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Every time I see the thread title I think, "Kidnapping?"

That crossed my mind too for a split second but I really hope if such an actual thread existed it would either be a joke or not up for very long.

 

[Meditation guide]

If they can't resist the urge of temporary pleasure, like many, then they made their decision.

Having a child is not what they are deciding to do. They are are horny and want sex. Natures little gotcha.

I can't believe there are people who can't understand the drive for sex is not something some people have the ability to resist. Nature planned it that way. You're getting pregnant like it or not.

 

[Wayfaerer]

From what I've seen, antinatalists are just projecting their own misery onto everyone else. You make it out to be as if everyone wants to die and should curse their parents for birthing them into a literal hell. This isn't the case for many people.

I do agree though that there are a lot of people who are reproducing that shouldn't but that's not everyone.

Two things you can't take from humans.... Sex and alcohol. Yeah, we can live without them, but most people won't.

True but there are always vasectomies and tubal ligation. I think it would be a great idea if we financially incentivized people sterilizing themselves. The kind who would take the offer are the kind you don't want having babies in the first place.

 

[DeadButDreaming]

If I were healthy I'd have kids. I might regardless.

 

[SipSop]

Knowing about the fact that
people hate people, how can you think of getting a kid?

Are all parents completely nuts and evil?

Evil is a point of view my friend.
You can decide who is evil and who is not. Not them.
You have your own interests and they have theirs. You decide what is evil and whst is not, not the majority of people.
I say this because I had read some comments here about: how am I evil?
Evil is decided by individual, not the majority. They are subjective.
Of course, if you want to blend in the community you must adopt the majoritys point of view, at least at the surface.
Don't let them trick you.