Help How can I help my younger brother

[Emerita]

My younger brother is much younger than me I don't want to say his exact age. But big age gap… anyway I don't know if there's anything I can do to help him, he is so young, has so much life in his eyes. There's excitement in him and childhood is just beginning for him I don't want to ruin that. I know suicide is not something you can just magically take the consequences away. Im also worried about how the aftermath will affect the parenting of him.

To help with the parenting aspect I contacted the different social services where I live about anything for those grieving or meal services that could be arranged, it's been months no response. I tried getting info but it's kinda hard to plan something when Im the one going to be dead, like I can't say that. Also that way with cleaning I cant pre hire someone for cleaning where a dead body was when the persons not dead and that person is me.

I was trying to get something to help out a bit when Im gone to help ease the stress and ultimately lessen the stress of my brother. I don't have any Ideas of what I could do directly for him though. I know this is kind of a hard thing to help with but if you have any ideas please share! How can I help him after Im gone?

Edit:
I have experienced grief I know what it feels like Im not suggesting that I can prevent that Im just simply looking for things that I can help or do for my little brother. Anyway I have come up with some small gestures I can do.

Taking pictures/ videos with him
I think I might write birthday cards to him at least till his 18th
And then what was suggested

although these are small and I guess meaningless

 

[Holu]

I'm assuming he isn't entirely reliant on you right? While I despise being that person, if he is currently 100% dependent on you then I'd urge you to consider holding out for longer. However assuming he is being raised by your parent or parents, then somethings I can think of are:

1. Money. It doesn't hurt to just make sure all your assets go to him directly or into a trust.
2. Letters + memories. If you have a journal and you aren't uncomfortable with giving it to your family, then it could be something he might want to read later. Also, this is dumb, but as someone who has lost close friends, the thing I miss most is hearing their voices. Recording an audio of sorts so they don't forget is sweet.
3. Minimize trauma. For obvious reasons you don't want him walking in to see your body, or if he must, then do what you can to make it not the gorey.

Ultimately, if the decision is the bus, then there isn't anything you can do to fully isolate and prevent him from suffering from your loss. It's an unfortunately inevitable part of passing, suicide or not.

Hope whatever choice you make works out.

 

[MercenariesofMidgar]

If you two are close, I understand your care, but something like this will undoubtedly scar him. It's the harsh truth. Grief will age you quickly. And the day-- that moment he knew his big sibling was dead would be a memory he will remember vividly. I don't really know how else to put it... I don't think you completely understand how *immensely* influencing your CTB would be on him.

I don't say this to make you feel bad, or feel ashamed for feeling this way. You have your reasons. But this is the kind of effect your death will have on him.
I've seen it from experience.
Also if you are his primary caretaker as this almost implies I'd honestly hold off for awhile... unless you are okay with this possibility

 

[Emerita]

if he is currently 100% dependent on you then I'd urge you to consider holding out for longer.

Also if you are his primary caretaker as this almost implies I'd honestly hold off for awhile... unless you are okay with this possibility

I am not the primary caretaker nor is he dependent on me. He has parents who are his caretakers. My concerns about the parenting are because I know my death will effect him in multiple ways not just directly but one being the mental state of his parents afterwards will effect him too.

 

[Holu]

I am not the primary caretaker nor is he dependent on me. He has parents who are his caretakers. My concerns about the parenting are because I know my death will effect him in multiple ways not just directly but one being the mental state of his parents afterwards will effect him too.

Ya, I figured you weren't the primary caretaker.

Death and its consequences are just something you will have to accept. You can minimize the suffering, but no matter what it's going to be hell on your loved ones.

But you are also a person, with your own suffering and choices. It's up for you to decide. While it may sound selfish to chose death, sometimes you simply can't go on. We all have our breakpoints and thresholds.

It's still very sweet and kind of you to be so considerate. If you don't think you are at the end of your rope and still have fight in you, then continue to fight. But if it feels like the end is nigh, then do what you can to minimize not only their suffering but your own.

The decision is hard but it's your decision to make. You are your own keeper and know your own limits.