GASLIGHTER7000
august
- May 1, 2025
- 63
i told myself there was some hope, that things would get better. im still praying it will but who am i kidding? i dont have it in me to keep going this way. i want to die, i honestly and genuinely just want to die. this gut wrenching hopelessness is enough to drive me to suicide. i honestly can't keep going, i talked to people, got close to them, tried to change my life, got a job, indulged in things and hobbies i loved but it doesn't matter at all. i'll be empty forever- i'll suffer for the rest of my life if i choose to keep living, i know it. i'd rather be dead than live like this. i'm going to try to commit suicide, even though it'll hurt my family i'll spend all the time i can with them before i die. i feel so sorry for them, to do this to them feels horrible, living in this house knowing im planning my own suicide and they'll have to bury me feels like a disgusting betrayal to them- the only people in the world who really love me. i love them so much, and despise myself
