B

bpdandme

Experienced
Feb 3, 2020
239
I am literally on my phone/the internet of some form all day every day barely moving for the past 11 years. I am so bored but have no energy to do anything cause I'm depressed/anxious which creates more self-hatred. I wish I was a norm so baddddddd. I just want to be able to do everyday tasks without feeling drained. This is no life, there is nothing to hold on for. Why is it so much effort and energy to function and get labelled lazy in the mean time.
 
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Whitewash11235814

Whitewash11235814

Experienced
Oct 21, 2019
207
I've been doing the same old for 4 years now. I can relate to your struggle. I also have bad anxiety that prevents me from doing simple things. I'm currently waiting to see if a partner is able to obtain fentanyl in time. If not, I'm gonna jump from the famous Pasadena suicide bridge (144 feet to concrete). The SI will prob be very strong with the latter method, so I hope my partner is able to get the fentanyl.
 
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faust

faust

lost among the stars
Jan 26, 2020
3,138
Hello,
I am sorry, you are dealing with such experience in your life...
The thing that can help you is movement. This is not a guaranteed help, but from my own observations.
A walk creates an illusion that you are doing something so it might be a bit easier to do all the things after a short/long walk.
Though eleven years is so much...
 
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B

bpdandme

Experienced
Feb 3, 2020
239
I've been doing the same old for 4 years now. I can relate to your struggle. I also have bad anxiety that prevents me from doing simple things. I'm currently waiting to see if a partner is able to obtain fentanyl in time. If not, I'm gonna jump from the famous Pasadena suicide bridge (144 feet to concrete). The SI will prob be very strong with the latter method, so I hope my partner is able to get the fentanyl.

Sorry it's come to that for you, if you want to chat I'm here! Anxiety is so horrible ;-;
Hello,
I am sorry, you are dealing with such experience in your life...
The thing that can help you is movement. This is not a guaranteed help, but from my own observations.
A walk creates an illusion that you are doing something so it might be a bit easier to do all the things after a short/long walk.
Though eleven years is so much...

Thank you! It is a long time, I just don't see a future for me when I can't even get out of bed. I will try and go for a walk today even if its the only thing I do!
 
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