Have you told anyone you want to ctb?

[Kogoruhn]

Does someone close to you know that you want to suicide? How did they react to this?
I somehow feel i must convince my family to accept my decision because of my illness, but they hate when i bring the idea. It's the same always.

 

[Hanger]

I haven´t told anybody, it´s better they know it when I´m dead

 

[Nozorel]

I haven't told anyone and I don't intend to. Last time I did (3ys ago), I got a free 1 month forced vacation in the psychiatric ward.

 

[Tiburcio]

Once I tried to talk with my mother about my depression, and the asshole only scoulded me shouting how idiot I was.

Also I tried it with some """friends""", and they complained too and they got angry like if I was being selfish.
One of this mindless guys told me if I ctb he will hit me for being so stupid, and I really angry menaced with stabbing him if this happen, totally serious.

...what a beautiful world.

 

[Caerula]

I told my mom when I was in high school. She was clearly stunned and saddened. And I heard nothing else from her other than the usual anti suicide arguments. I don't think there is a point talking to them about what I want and how I feel.

 

[HangInThere]

No, it's not a good idea because...

1. Most people are against suicide
2. They can't help but have a kneejerk response to any mention of suicidal thoughts
3. It will endanger you and your eventual plans of suicide
4. Might get you locked up in some psychward
5. If the person doesn't intervene if you express that you have plans to commit suicide, they might be face legal consequences for "assisting suicide". (Not sure about this one)
6. It will only make them worry and feel bad.
7. It serves no purpose other than venting your feelings

My opinion on this are the following: unless your intention is to seek help, you should probably avoid telling anyone in real life. Most of us here are deadset (ha) on suicide, therefore being open about it wouldn't benefit anyone. I suggest using online forums (like this) or just say you want to die (but as a joke) since that seems to be a trend among younger people nowadays

 

[wanttodie]

I haven´t told anybody i want to end my life

 

[Neon]

Nobody needs to know.

 

[ImNotBatman]

I've only told my previous stories of what happened when people intervened before, and that if it happened again, it'd just be worse. I never mention it by name, because people often show evidence to cops, in an attempt to get a reaction.
The most I would say to a friend is :"I'm ready to be a complete idiot. Got all my ducks in a row. "

 

[Sonnenblume]

That's how you get the police at your door, it happened to me. People are assholes, especially friends and family. Trust no one.

 

[Malice1]

Nobody needs to know.

I agree with this. As for me personally? They predicted i was suicidal because of the way my life turned out. So yes, my family knows im suicidal.

 

[typx]

My mom threatened to kill herself if I went through with it. Of course, a few years ago she told me I might as well just go get a rope if I was so unhappy. Her response really depends on her mood towards me.

 

[Sonnenblume]

My mom threatened to kill herself if I went through with it. Of course, a few years ago she told me I might as well just go get a rope if I was so unhappy. Her response really depends on her mood towards me.

damn that's awful, sorry you are treated that way. :(

 

[FakeNews]

Careful. Once the cat is out of the bag, your life is forever changed.

Had a friend ask for help because he was suicidal. He's fine now, but his dreams of being a pilot are no longer a reality. Can't even get medical for his private pilot license.

Thinking of law enforcement career? Handling sensitive/ classified information? Think your medical records are "sealed?"

Don't be a fool. Life isn't fair and if you share this information with others, there is a good chance it will haunt you for the rest of your life. We like to talk about second chances but we, as a society, are fucking hypocrites.

 

[Sonnenblume]

Careful. Once the cat is out of the bag, your life is forever changed.

Had a friend ask for help because he was suicidal. He's fine now, but his dreams of being a pilot are no longer a reality. Can't even get medical for his private pilot license.

Thinking of law enforcement career? Handling sensitive/ classified information? Think your medical records are "sealed?"

Don't be a fool. Life isn't fair and if you share this information with others, there is a good chance it will haunt you for the rest of your life. We like to talk about second chances but we, as a society, are fucking hypocrites.

you cant be in law enforcement if you've ever been suicidal? wow

 

[typx]

damn that's awful, sorry you are treated that way. :(

Thank you for your words :-) It's good to see you back on here.

I guess my mom was/is a pretty serious narcissist. When I was 22 she opened a credit card in my name. She maxed it out and then didn't pay it so the bank started calling her. She only contacted me when they threatened her with the authorities if the person named on the card didn't call them. It ruined my credit. Who does that?! Just thinking about it kills me. I wish I could say I turned out better than a person like that. But the proof says otherwise.

 

[Tiredman]

Just people on this website. I dont wanna get thrown in a pysch ward so I don't think I'd risk it.

 

[FakeNews]

you cant be in law enforcement if you've ever been suicidal? wow

Anything that requires deep background check or psych evaluation will be difficult (at best.)

If you have multiple candidates with similar qualities - do you pick the one who at one time valued life so little they wanted (or tried) to off themselves? If they admitted their desires to harm themselves, do they harbor thoughts of harming others? Why would any employer take that chance?

Unfortunately, I've seen it play out in ways that aren't fair, many years later in life.

 

[DF90]

My best friend irl knows I am CTB, I tell them everything and luckily they have the same views that all of us do. That they'll miss me, but it's ultimately my choice.

 

[Sonnenblume]

My best friend irl knows I am CTB, I tell them everything and luckily they have the same views that all of us do. That they'll miss me, but it's ultimately my choice.

That's really amazing. I wish I'd had a decent friend like that.

 

[DF90]

That's really amazing. I wish I'd had a decent friend like that.

I am very very lucky to have them. I've known them for around 12 years. Unfortunately I believe they understand so well because we've gone through a lot of the same things and they are off and on ctb also, though they aren't apart of anything like these forums/discords.

 

[Pallf]

There's no reason to tell anyone. I've tried with my parents and they act interested for a short while but then go back to being disinterested. Therapists can't help. No one can.

 

[Walilamdzi]

Yes I've told my family. They want me to get counselling and my father said that I can't know that I don't enjoy things because I haven't tried everything, or something, which was a bit frustrating.

 

[JohnUK]

No. Better when dead for anyone connected with me to know what happened

 

[Cookiedough8956]

My bf,
and he reacted badly, raged out and started going crazy.. (I was dumb enough to believe he'd actually support me)
: (

 

[seekingoblivion]

Years ago. My family, a friend or two. Not worth it. And you hear these anti suicide folk going on about talk to somebody you're close to. Just people getting pissed or dismissing your feelings entirely.

 

[TAW122]

Never, nor will I tell anyone if/when the time comes (until after I'm dead -- which is why delayed emails and notes come into play). When it comes to suicide, it's basically me versus the entire world (including society, government, peers and all). The only place safe enough to be open about suicide plans, ideation, and methods is here, on this forum, and no where else.

No, it's not a good idea because...

1. Most people are against suicide
2. They can't help but have a kneejerk response to any mention of suicidal thoughts
3. It will endanger you and your eventual plans of suicide
4. Might get you locked up in some psychward
5. If the person doesn't intervene if you express that you have plans to commit suicide, they might be face legal consequences for "assisting suicide". (Not sure about this one)
6. It will only make them worry and feel bad.
7. It serves no purpose other than venting your feelings

My opinion on this are the following: unless your intention is to seek help, you should probably avoid telling anyone in real life. Most of us here are deadset (ha) on suicide, therefore being open about it wouldn't benefit anyone. I suggest using online forums (like this) or just say you want to die (but as a joke) since that seems to be a trend among younger people nowadays

This sums it up pretty well, and far too oftenly, people who openly talk about ctb/suicide IRL oftenly gets poorly treated by society, authorities (the government and medical professionals), and end up in a worse situation than before.

Careful. Once the cat is out of the bag, your life is forever changed.

Had a friend ask for help because he was suicidal. He's fine now, but his dreams of being a pilot are no longer a reality. Can't even get medical for his private pilot license.

Thinking of law enforcement career? Handling sensitive/ classified information? Think your medical records are "sealed?"

Don't be a fool. Life isn't fair and if you share this information with others, there is a good chance it will haunt you for the rest of your life. We like to talk about second chances but we, as a society, are fucking hypocrites.

Yeah and most people in society don't know this as a potential consequence (or know but don't care or downplay it). Also, I agree with your last sentence, we as a society as fucking hypocrites, we say one thing but do another thing altogether, oftenly the opposite of what we said.

 

[YukiFox]

No because I don't want to hear the same b*%$·&$t about "Life is great, don't be egoist, don't be coward, it's a sin, there are people out there living in worse situations like yours" etc... so I prefer to talk here and even into a psychiatrist I don't mention my ctb plan.

 

[Jean Améry]

Years ago. My family, a friend or two. Not worth it. And you hear these anti suicide folk going on about talk to somebody you're close to. Just people getting pissed or dismissing your feelings entirely.

That is also my experience. Th best way to lose someone you care about is to tell them about your desire to CTB. Plus if you do tell anyone and CTB afterwards you'll have guilt-tripped them and they could end up with severe mental problems aswell.

In theory it would be great to be able to talk to an impartial professional about this as they're being paid to absorb emotional crap, in practice this will likely lead to being locked up in the loony bin a.k.a prison for thought crimes.

 

[silentsinger]

Sort of but not with any detail. I would never say to someone that I'm about to do it for fear of being stopped. I like to think that I will be doing it in the next week or two but I don't know if I will just end up backing out at the last minute. All I know is that I can't carry on alone like this anymore and I can't take all the pain. It's just the same, day after day.