Discussion Have you ever thrown something away you wish you hadn't? Do you feel like you have ruined your life?

[Spite]

I feel this way a lot. Sadly in my case I don't feel comfortable detailing exactly what happened as it's a very unique and specific circumstance, but several years ago I feel like I was actually quite close to attaining what could have possibly been my 'dream life', despite how horrible my childhood was. I was on the road to success. I could have lived a great life.

I threw everything away impulsively in a fit of rage, and it was all over a stupid argument. Everything I had worked hard for, all the respect I had earned over the course of a few years - gone - in a single day, as a result of a single decision. I couldn't bring myself to 'agree to disagree' in an argument, so I flew off the rails and snapped, ghosting everyone. I ghosted a lot of people who cared about me and thought highly of me. I've since tried to get them back but none of them want anything to do with me anymore. I betrayed and hurt them. I blew it. I'm a total failure.

I've had a few opportunities to better my life, and almost every single time, I have managed to find a way to squander those opportunities and ruin everything somehow.

Knowing you will never get something back honestly has to be one of the worst feelings in the world. I feel like I ruined my life. This all happened years ago and I'm still devastated and heartbroken over it. I will always desperately wish things were different. I wish I wasn't a mentally ill, miserable fuck-up.

I want to die.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I feel this way a lot. Sadly in my case I don't feel comfortable detailing exactly what happened as it's a very unique and specific circumstance, but several years ago I feel like I was actually quite close to attaining what could have possibly been my 'dream life', despite how horrible my childhood was. I was on the road to success. I could have lived a great life.

I threw everything away impulsively in a fit of rage, and it was all over a stupid argument. Everything I had worked hard for, all the respect I had earned over the course of a few years - gone - in a single day, as a result of a single decision. I couldn't bring myself to 'agree to disagree' in an argument, so I flew off the rails and snapped, ghosting everyone. I ghosted a lot of people who cared about me and thought highly of me. I've since tried to get them back but none of them want anything to do with me anymore. I betrayed and hurt them. I blew it. I'm a total failure.

I've had a few opportunities to better my life, and almost every single time, I have managed to find a way to squander those opportunities and ruin everything somehow.

Knowing you will never get something back honestly has to be one of the worst feelings in the world. I feel like I ruined my life. This all happened years ago and I'm still devastated and heartbroken over it. I will always desperately wish things were different. I wish I wasn't a mentally ill, miserable fuck-up.

I want to die.

I'm so sorry that life has brought you here and you've had to suffer so much.

It's ok, it's life, we all goof up. Know your self worth and don't run after anyone. Once you close the door to someone, never open it again, or you'll lose your value forever. That's what happened when you tried to contact them. As you ghosted them, you hurt their ego, so when you contacted them, they returned you that favour.

Don't worry, they are not the only ppl in the world.. You can always restart. Welcome to SaSu..a community of loving and supportive people who are in the same shoes as you but are willing to listen to you, to befriend you, to support you in every way possible.
So, you have come home
Wish you all the peace and happiness