Ratherbeskinny
"Insert profound quote here."
- Oct 28, 2019
- 108
Yes although at the time I really thought it would kill me it was more a cry for help.
It may be in the long run, but I'm going to be completely honest here; I've done it as well. I've even asked/begged my boyfriend at the time if I could just swallow some pills, just enough to get me hospitalized so they would finally help me. I was in a very very bad place at the time and was so selfdestructive that it almost literally got me killed a few times (that's the point rn, but it was different back then) I just needed/wanted help, yet the health care system here only seems to listen to someone when they put themselves or others in serious danger. Words don't mean a thing. If I hadn't tried to kill myself so much, I'd be dead already. Isn't that weird? It may sound hypocritical because all I really want rn is to just have peace, but I just wasn't ready back then in the way I am now to end it all. I also did quite a few "serious" and very dangerous attempts, but I'll admit; I knew I wasn't going to die from swallowing 20 to 40 pills. Today, I seem more happy than I've ever been. I should be in fucking broadway for it. But I know that this is my only option left and I know that the next and last time I attempt, it will be successfull. No more health care system attention needed. Just peace.Never, because I'd think that would be entirely pointless.
Me tooYes although at the time I really thought it would kill me it was more a cry for help.
I wonder if suicide gesture is a better term. Although it apparently has its own problems.R.E.: thread title.
If you know you are not going to die, then it isn't a suicide attempt is it ?
I took my first overdose and had I not of vomited, it would have killed me. I knew how much it would take to be successful but because I don't drink, I couldn't hold the alcohol.
The second overdose was simply because I needed help and just didn't know where to get it from.
I took a lot of medications that I had left over with a lot of alcohol. I don't usually drink and clearly couldn't handle it, if I hadn't of vommed, I'd be gone. There was just abit of everything you could imagine in there.Which overdose nearly killed you
No, but I genuinely considered taking a week off work this year so I could overdose on a bunch of stuff, not tell anyone and just cope with the effects and bounce back. I just wanted to imagine that it was real as I did it, I wanted the feeling of "this is it", take the pills and pass out for a few days. Then sort myself out and go back to work. It was my idea of a treat.
Suicide attempts without intent to die are perfectly valid. Self-harm/cry for help/escapism/test-drive...whatever it is, it's an expression of pain. My little sister used to do it, she would neck pills, not enough to die obviously, and as usual, our parents would tell her she wasn't going to hospital. I feel like she kept on doing it so one day they wouldn't ignore it. If your mental health problems are ignored, you may end up resorting to increasingly desperate means to show your pain. I think if people don't respond to your suicide attempts correctly, it throws your ability to perceive the gravity of the act itself out of whack and makes further attempts more likely.