Method Has anyone here used meditation as prep for suicide?

[FutureHanger]

If you look at my last post you'll see I came close to hanging myself. Something I noticed was that I felt quite surreal, from the moment the clock hit the time I said I was gonna get my things and go to the rail I planned on hanging myself at, I felt quite excited and was like that until my SI kicked in. I got too distracted and forgot my original plan of using the boost of excitement to get me to the place but then calming myself down somehow so I could be more at peace before actually attempting because if I'm really excited then I'll be too impulsive which just makes it easier for SI to kick in. I've now reflected and have thought, how can I calm myself down, maybe meditating once I tie the rope to the anchor point? . In the past meditating whilst playing nature sounds on my phone really helps me stabilise myself when I'm too emotionally aroused, though I won't need to play sounds on my phone as I'll be outside anyways and I feel listening to the noises of the outside may help me find it less scary even though it'll be dark when I'm attempting. So I'd like to hear if anyone here has attempted to use meditation just moments before an attempt to help be more at peace with it and if it helped or not.

 

[mortuarymary]

Yes.
Used Tegretol with Zopiclone but my SI kicked in. Puked it up rang ambulance for charcoal treatment. I just went into panic mode. Wasn't my time.

 

[cosmic_traveler]

Before my attempt in March, we had our last week planned out. Mostly movies by myself and good food every day. When the time arrived, it was just the last activity we had planned, it was just time to go to sleep.

In December, it was mostly the same, February 4th is our next target. We meditate pretty regularly and have no fear of death or SI to hold us back.

I am not this body, it's just a collection of food we've eaten throughout our life.

I am not even this mind, our brain is just a switchboard operator constantly trying to predict the future based on the evidence we've experienced.

I do not believe in death, only life. When this body can no longer contain this "life", it'll continue on as something else. Anything else is better than this existence.

 

[FutureHanger]

Before my attempt in March, we had our last week planned out. Mostly movies by myself and good food every day. When the time arrived, it was just the last activity we had planned, it was just time to go to sleep.

In December, it was mostly the same, February 4th is our next target. We meditate pretty regularly and have no fear of death or SI to hold us back.

I am not this body, it's just a collection of food we've eaten throughout our life.

I am not even this mind, our brain is just a switchboard operator constantly trying to predict the future based on the evidence we've experienced.

I do not believe in death, only life. When this body can no longer contain this "life", it'll continue on as something else. Anything else is better than this existence.

cool! did it help with SI? what type of meditation and how long was it? how long before attempt was it?

 

[cosmic_traveler]

cool! did it help with SI? what type of meditation and how long was it? how long before attempt was it?

The meditation is called Isha Kriya. There is a guided meditation app led by Sadhguru.

It's 30 reps of breathing in through your nose and exhaling from your mouth. By the 25th rep you should feel a little light headed.

After the 30th rep, your body won't feel like a body, more like a vessel. You'll notice that, "hey I don't need to immediately breathe" because your blood will be super oxygenated. If you can hit the "uh" sound correctly at the end, you should feel every cell in your body vibrating to the tone.

 

[FutureHanger]

The meditation is called Isha Kriya. There is a guided meditation app led by Sadhguru.

It's 30 reps of breathing in through your nose and exhaling from your mouth. By the 25th rep you should feel a little light headed.

After the 30th rep, your body won't feel like a body, more like a vessel. You'll notice that, "hey I don't need to immediately breathe" because your blood will be super oxygenated. If you can hit the "uh" sound correctly at the end, you should feel every cell in your body vibrating to the tone.

damn sounds cool will it go this smooth from first try or will I need experience with it to get it that right?

 

[cosmic_traveler]

damn sounds cool will it go this smooth from first try or will I need experience with it to get it that right?

In the end it's just a breathing technique. I'm sure you know how to breathe. The mantra is a choice, "I am not this body" on the inhale, "I am not even this mind" on the exhale.

I find the mantra helps for wandering thoughts. Every time you meditate and your mind begins to wander, let it, spend a moment with the distraction, then forgive yourself and allow your mind to flow back into the mantra.

If you've heard "Aum" when people meditate it's 3 separate sounds, Ah, Uh, Mm. With Isha Kriya you're focused on the "UH" sound. It'll sound a lot like the noise people make when they're confused.

 

[FutureHanger]

In the end it's just a breathing technique. I'm sure you know how to breathe. The mantra is a choice, "I am not this body" on the inhale, "I am not even this mind" on the exhale.

I find the mantra helps for wandering thoughts. Every time you meditate and your mind begins to wander, let it, spend a moment with the distraction, then forgive yourself and allow your mind to flow back into the mantra.

If you've heard "Aum" when people meditate it's 3 separate sounds, Ah, Uh, Mm. With Isha Kriya you're focused on the "UH" sound. It'll sound a lot like the noise people make when they're confused.

thanks a lot! sorry if this sounds like a stupid question but is this the one you used?

 

[cosmic_traveler]

thanks a lot! sorry if this sounds like a stupid question but is this the one you used?

Yes, that is the one.

There are no stupid questions because we don't have all the answers. Be well on your journey.

 

[iusedtobehappy]

The meditation is called Isha Kriya. There is a guided meditation app led by Sadhguru.

It's 30 reps of breathing in through your nose and exhaling from your mouth. By the 25th rep you should feel a little light headed.

After the 30th rep, your body won't feel like a body, more like a vessel. You'll notice that, "hey I don't need to immediately breathe" because your blood will be super oxygenated. If you can hit the "uh" sound correctly at the end, you should feel every cell in your body vibrating to the tone.

I love Sadhguru, follow him on YT and just saved this meditation, TY! Did you know his wife died by meditation or in a meditative state? When I read that, I listened to death meditation for awhile but of course I am not a yogi so. Sounds like an ideal way to go.

 

[cosmic_traveler]

I love Sadhguru, follow him on YT and just saved this meditation, TY! Did you know his wife died by meditation or in a meditative state? When I read that, I listened to death meditation for awhile but of course I am not a yogi so. Sounds like an ideal way to go.

I never learned anything about his wife. That's certainly a strange way to go, but so is spontaneous human combustion. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up again. Big hugs. Be well on your journey.

 

[Argo]

Yes, I've been thinking about writing a guide about SI , meditation, and just about what the general attitude should be in the days before dying. I've been doing meditation pretty much every day for 6 years now, and it's basically just as useful for getting through life as it would be for getting out of it. SI is simply based in thought and emotion and sensation, and being able to see these patterns clearly as objects in awareness, rather than get hypnotized in some egocentric story, is pretty useful. Or, in the event that one is making a mistake(either as an isolated case, as with a bad method/poor risk assessment/timing, or being mistaken about suicide all together), then mindfulness would be the exact quality of mind you would want, and what would be beneficial, in that case.

So really in all cases you can imagine, mediation and mindfulness is the thing we're after whether we know it or not.