Don't wonder that. I saw you mention that is isn't a place to just talk about CTB. That's absolutely not true. You are not required to kill yourself within a certain timeframe after you join here.
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Hey Guest,
As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.
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Don't wonder that. I saw you mention that is isn't a place to just talk about CTB. That's absolutely not true. You are not required to kill yourself within a certain timeframe after you join here.
I've had many failed attempts, serious ones at that. Definitely not my fault I can't die. I will be on here till I succeed
This is not some sick competition you know
Amen.
It's difficult to have found a community I feel comfortable and open with, and to see it dissolve away as we each accomplish the exact goal that drew us here.
Amira
Student
- Nov 15, 2018
- 180
Amira
Student
- Nov 15, 2018
- 180
Angst Filled Fuck Up
Visionary
- Sep 9, 2018
- 2,985
Sometimes I feel weird for sticking around, like I'm only moonlighting as someone who wants to ctb. Is this a common feeling among more regular members? Like I know it's stupid and I shouldn't feel that way, but there's a kind of self imposed feeling of "walk the walk" that I get sometimes.
skitliv
Le mort joyeux
- Jul 11, 2018
- 485
I get what you're saying, but I wouldn't let it bug you. I'll say publicly I have zero intention on killing myself right now. Not because im better or everything is fixed, it's because I can't. I've tried and failed many times. Don't feel weird for hanging around. There are no expiry dates on accounts and you do not have to be actively trying to kill yourself to fit in here.
Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
In the event he succeeded, I'll keep this burning. For him, and all the others who have successfully ctb.
Xerxes
Invisible
- Nov 8, 2018
- 936
They are in charge of their own destinies. I am confident in them that they know what they are doing and they made the right choices. I don't get close to too many, and I feel for some that it is the best. Whatever things you have said to me or I to you, doesn't matter afterwards in death.
Xerxes
Invisible
- Nov 8, 2018
- 936
I get the feeling sometimes as well. I was close to CTBing, but then nature didn't allow me to do it, but why stop there? I could've did something else, hanged myself, take a bunch of pills, swallow Drano, etc., but the urge was gone and I felt the posts leading to it were weak attempts. I don't think the community is going to rally against you and call you weak-willed or a fraud. Shit happens and didn't work that day, maybe your day will be better and you recover or you're back to the drawing board to CTB.
Me too. I have so many methods so readily available, and yet I can't pull myself together and succeed; I'm still here. I often feel like a fraud.
Jiva
I want ...
- Nov 18, 2018
- 493
Death is sad always. Does not important you want to live, or you want to die, the end is sad always...
RainAndSadness
Administrator
- Jun 12, 2018
- 2,149
It feels terrible. It makes me want to build up distance to the people here because it's saddening. I know most members here will eventually leave. And I've talked to many lovely people in this forum that left already. I wonder what they experienced in their last moments. I just hope it was peaceful for them.
