GOODBYE

[StarryStarry]

I wanted to thank all of the decent people on this site. Unfortunately, there are people on this site who portray themselves as something they are not. Due to my horrible xperience with one of the members of SS, and the fact that he is till on this site, in order to maintain my integrity and, sense of self worth and keep my depression and anxiety at a level I can somewhat deal with I am signing off for good. I've asked the mods to assist and have yet to receive any assistance. So, I am taking matters into my own hands. Again there are some of you who have been a great help to me and you'll never know how much I have appreciated speaking with you. I wish you all peace in your lives. THanks.

Starry Starry OUT - PEACE

(I'll keep this up until 6:30 p.m. tonight) Again, I wish you all nothing but peace.

 

[Cathy Ames]

Well... crap.... I'm very sorry to see you go, @StarryStarry.

Also? I sure wouldn't mind it if you were to send me the name of the person who did this.

 

[Slimetae]

peace sorry u had a bad experience

 

[Lost Magic]

I'm sorry you felt that you had to leave because of someone you are having trouble with. Can't you just ignore this person instead of leaving though? You can just right click their profile pick and ignore all their posts. Problem solved.

 

[imcurious]

I just joined SS and I'm already learning about the few, yet horrible people that permeate this space. I am sorry you had a bad experience with this person. Wish you so much love and peace, I'm proud of every decision you make that benefits your integrity. <3

 

[StarryStarry]

Well... crap.... I'm very sorry to see you go, @StarryStarry.

Also? I sure wouldn't mind it if you were to send me the name of the person who did this.

Cathy, before I leave tonight I will post his name. I don't want any repercussions at this point in time (from Mods or him). I don't want what happened to me happen to any other female on this site. I came here for support .... I don't know what I'll do now. Thank you. Sweet Pea and I will miss all the good people we've met here.

I'm sorry you felt that you had to leave because of someone you are having trouble with. Can't you just ignore this person instead of leaving though? You can just right click their profile pick and ignore all their posts. Problem solved.

I've already put him on ignore. Unfortunately, I can ignore him but he can still see every post that I put on this site.

 

[Cathy Ames]

Cathy, before I leave tonight I will post his name. I don't want any repercussions at this point in time (from Mods or him). I don't want what happened to me happen to any other female on this site. I came here for support .... I don't know what I'll do now. Thank you. Sweet Pea and I will miss all the good people we've met here.

I'll try to remember to come back at 6:30 (**looks around in a panic**). I wish you well as you head into the future. This really stinks, your loss of support.

 

[luke_skywalker]

What will be your methods?

 

[wljourney]

What will be your methods?

She is leaving this forum site because of an abusive member. Not CTBing.

 

[Lullaby]

I really hope you'll rethink this, there's people in the community who still are really caring and I think being on here has been a good crutch for you to express what you're going through. Then again, knowing that person is is still here has to be incredibly uncomfortable and triggering.

If there's someone on here taking advantage of people, that really needs to be dealt with.

Regardless of whatever you do, I'm wishing nothing but the best for you and Sweet Pea.

 

[StarryStarry]

What will be your methods?

There is NO way in hell I would kill myself over this guy.

 

[WhatAMess]

I really don't understand people that come here just to kick people who are already down. Maybe it's their way of coping with the lack of attention in their life but the fact that the innocent, unexpecting have to suffer consequences makes me furious. That's the way life treats good people i guess so it's not surprising.

 

[Cathy Ames]

I'm sorry you felt that you had to leave because of someone you are having trouble with. Can't you just ignore this person instead of leaving though? You can just right click their profile pick and ignore all their posts. Problem solved.

I'm not @StarryStarry and obviously don't speak for her, but in a similar circumstance, I don't think that would help me very much, if at all. That person would still be able to read anything that Starry posted, and the knowledge of that would weigh on her mind as she was writing posts or comments. I imagine it would cause her to hold back instead of writing "freely" (or as freely as she cared to) as she had been doing before this. I think being able to write and share freely (and then get responses to that) could be part of what used to make her feel supported here.

 

[StarryStarry]

I'm not @StarryStarry and obviously don't speak for her, but in a similar circumstance, I don't think that would help me very much, if at all. That person would still be able to read anything that Starry posted, and the knowledge of that would weigh on her mind as she was writing posts or comments. I imagine it would cause her to hold back instead of writing "freely" (or as freely as she cared to) as she had been doing before this. I think being able to write and share freely (and then get responses to that) could be part of what used to make her feel supported here.

Thank you Cathy - that's exactly how I am feeling. THe really sad part of all this is that the mods refuse to help me. The one and only place where I thought I could get help and they turn their back on me. This site has gone downhill since changing hands. ALl I can say is you can't speak freely here anymore - there are people on this site whose only intention is to tear people down while the mods sit back and not do a damn thing. Very sad.
THIS REPLY IS FOR EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER BEEN KIND AND CONSIDERATE OF ME. I TRULY APPRECIATE IT. UNFORTUNATELY, MODS REFUSE TO ASSIST ME AND HAVE TAKEN THE SIDE OF THE ABUSER SO I'M SIGNING OFF NOW. I JUST WANTED THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE HELPED ME THAT I DO APPRECIATE YOU ALL.

I really hope you'll rethink this, there's people in the community who still are really caring and I think being on here has been a good crutch for you to express what you're going through. Then again, knowing that person is is still here has to be incredibly uncomfortable and triggering.

If there's someone on here taking advantage of people, that really needs to be dealt with.

Regardless of whatever you do, I'm wishing nothing but the best for you and Sweet Pea.

Thank you. Unfortunately when I went to the mods for assistance they failed in their obligations and took his side. Sad very sad.

Well... crap.... I'm very sorry to see you go, @StarryStarry.

Also? I sure wouldn't mind it if you were to send me the name of the person who did this.

HIS NAME IS CAPSICUM_CORRAL

Well... crap.... I'm very sorry to see you go, @StarryStarry.

Also? I sure wouldn't mind it if you were to send me the name of the person who did this.

Not sure if that went through or not. The guy's name on this site is Capsicum_Corral.

 

[RainAndSadness]

I don't refuse to help you. I gave you the option to work with me because I need more input from your side before I remove someone from the community permanently. That's what you asked me to do and that's a serious demand but from what you've told me, there is nothing I can use to justify that action. A terrible relationship or neglect from your ex-partner is no reason to get permanently excluded from this forum. If there is actual abuse, that would prove malicious intent - it's gonna be a fingersnap. I took action in the past when somebody was evidently abusive to their ex-partner in this forum. But you want me to remove their existence in this forum because their presence is an inconvenince to you and I don't do that.

As I said, I understand your pain. A bad relationship can cause a lot of trauma and it seriously fucks you up when you're in a vulnerable position. And I'm sorry you've went through this. I sincerely mean that. I've been through terrible, hurtful relationships myself.

 

[StarryStarry]

I don't refuse to help you. I gave you the option to work with me because I need more input from your side before I remove someone from the community permanently. That's what you asked me to do and that's a serious demand but from what you've told me, there is nothing I can use to justify that action. A terrible relationship or neglect from your ex-partner is no reason to get permanently excluded from this forum. If there is actual abuse, that would prove malicious intent - it's gonna be a fingersnap. I took action in the past when somebody was evidently abusive to their ex-partner in this forum. But you want me to remove their existence on this forum because their presence is an inconvenince to you and I don't do that.

You are obviously clueless and maybe its time to replace you. I've seen many times where you refuse to help people. You are not god although you may think you are. You are nothing but some dumbass who was given a job that you obviously have no idea what to do with. This site was great before you now things go on that shouldn't and you look the other way. I'm out of here.

 

[Istanbulite]

godspeed

 

[RainAndSadness]

You are obviously clueless and maybe its time to replace you. I've seen many times where you refuse to help people. You are not god although you may think you are. You are nothing but some dumbass who was given a job that you obviously have no idea what to do with. This site was great before you now things go on that shouldn't and you look the other way. I'm out of here.

If I'm clueless, then you don't work with me and actually explain what has happened. If I consider someone harmful to this community, I'll remove them. But you didn't give me anything so far. It's rather ironic that you think the website was in better hands before - but okay. It's your wish to leave the forum and I accept that but I'm not just gonna sit back when you accuse me of enabling abuse. I take such accusations very seriously.

 

[Cathy Ames]

I have a question for @RainAndSadness (because I am still confused about how some of the things work here)....

When people make "profile posts" can those actually be restricted to mutuals, or no? If so, then that might be a way for someone like @StarryStarry to continue to get at least some support here (might be necessary to do some culling the list of people they were following, though). And, if so, then how EXACTLY would someone do it, like step by step? TIA.

 

[luke_skywalker]

She is leaving this forum site because of an abusive member. Not CTBing.

Oh sorry im non native english speaker i underdtood it wrong

 

[Cathy Ames]

Oh sorry im non native english speaker i underdtood it wrong

I'm a native speaker, and my initial impression was the same as yours (based on Subject Line). It didn't become clear until reading the rest of it. So don't feel bad. :-)

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that the moderators do a good job at removing things that are harmful. Anyway I think that this should be dealt with privately rather than on the main forum, but I wish you the best.

 

[710]

I'm sorry to see you go. Even though we've never spoken before, as a fellow cat lover, I've enjoyed reading your posts.

 

[wljourney]

Unless the person in question just deleted all of their previous posts the claimed abuse must have happened via chat/DM.

If the abuse happened via direct communications there should be plenty of evidence (unless deleted of course, which would be understandable).

Maybe this situation is best dealt with directly between Starry and R&S, since none of us know what exactly happened.

 

[RainAndSadness]

I have a question for @RainAndSadness (because I am still confused about how some of the things work here)....

When people make "profile posts" can those actually be restricted to mutuals, or no? If so, then that might be a way for someone like @StarryStarry to continue to get at least some support here (might be necessary to do some culling the list of people they were following, though). And, if so, then how EXACTLY would someone do it, like step by step? TIA.

You can do that in the privacy settings. Herer is a direct link. https://sanctioned-suicide.net/account/privacy
If you scroll down you can see all the options.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

I don't think R&S is doing anything wrong here. But regardless, I wish you peace and success in life, Starry.

 

[Cathy Ames]

You can do that in the privacy settings. Herer is a direct link. https://sanctioned-suicide.net/account/privacy
If you scroll down you can see all the options.

View attachment 92197

Thank you! Now I see where to do it. My next question is does "View you details on your profile page" include profile posts? I'm unclear on which pieces of information comprise "details on your profile page"?

 

[MementoMori81]

Sorry to hear you're going. I'm relatively new, but already feel like I've got a lot of time for the people here, as we all share a common set of struggles.
I wish you well with whatever path you choose hereafter, and I hope for nothing but good things for you.

 

[StarryStarry]

I really hope you'll rethink this, there's people in the community who still are really caring and I think being on here has been a good crutch for you to express what you're going through. Then again, knowing that person is is still here has to be incredibly uncomfortable and triggering.

If there's someone on here taking advantage of people, that really needs to be dealt with.

Regardless of whatever you do, I'm wishing nothing but the best for you and Sweet Pea.

I agree with you. Unfortunately the mod turned the entire situation around and actually blamed me. Stupid bitch. She has no clue how to deal with people who have depression and other issues. I can't stay someplace where I am treated this way.

 

[PrincessInWhite]

I agree with you. Unfortunately the mod turned the entire situation around and actually blamed me. Stupid bitch. She has no clue how to deal with people who have depression and other issues. I can't stay someplace where I am treated this way.

I wish you endless peace but you really should reflect before continuing to post endless disrespect against rain. this community would literally not be here without them. i'm deeply sorry for the situation! <3 but did you not have evidence of abuse beyond this person just being an ex of yours that was painful to see? Please understands mods cannot ban people solely because another member says they don't like them or they make them sad, any mod who operated that way wouldn't have a platform for long. My experience after the transition has been more positive, I've reported bigoted/homophobic/transphobic content and it was immediately removed, whereas before hate speech wasn't punished. IDK, I don't wanna invalidate anyone here and I genuinely wish you the best, but this situation is not black and white like you're seeing it in your current state.