TheDevilsAngel
LetMeFree
- Apr 22, 2019
- 768
I really hope you have found peace
Thinking of you
Thinking of you
gambardella
De l'inconvénient d'être né
- Dec 1, 2019
- 44
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Awwww. Meant. I actually go to sleep and wake up to this. Teach me to leave the board.
I always looked forward to seeing your posts. I hope you find the peace you deserve. Sending you love, light and peace.
I always looked forward to seeing your posts. I hope you find the peace you deserve. Sending you love, light and peace.
Brick In The Wall
2M Or Not 2B.
- Oct 30, 2019
- 25,158
voyager
Don't you dare go hollow...
- Nov 25, 2019
- 965
Sorry to see it. Knew it was coming, kept telling myself to reply to a particular post of yours. Gonna tell myself now that it's for the best, that this is why we're here, that it doesn't really mean anything. But it is sad to see you go. Hope you're in a better place.
First the important details:
I will be leaving tonight, around 2-3am EST US time (unless issues come up and I have to move it to tomorrow night), with N + 1g Dilantin after a 48h Meto regimen + fast. I will top that off with a little swig of alcohol and a nice dark piece of chocolate to help with the taste (I already sampled some of it and HOLY is it bitter).
It's taken over a decade of contemplation, this is NOT a rash decision and this site did not, in any way, influence my decision. It was my own to make and I am happy with my choice. I suffer from a long standing chronic physical/mental illness that is not improving with treatment and is in fact slowly getting worse despite being on the highest doses of intravenous medicines. It has affected and changed every part of my life and despite having to forcibly adapt to what was being thrown at me, I've come to an inevitable dead end. I do not wish to talk about this in detail. God knows the amount of time, money and effort that went into trying to heal. At some point you have to realize it's just not gonna happen for you and thats when N should be available to us all so that we may go on our own terms with dignity while we still can.
Words can not express the immense gratitude I have for this site; the information available here, the community of friendly, knowledgeable and helpful people and of course the Mods/Admins who keep this thing going. You are providing a great services to us all, don't let anyone else tell you different. From the bottom of my heart, I Thank You.
Although probably unnecessary, I just want to confirm everything Ark was reporting regarding the N is true. I am one of the people he's been in contact with since I ordered from A around the same time and, just as Ark, I also received 2 (60ml) plastic bottles. I nearly lost my mind when I saw we were missing 80mls and A wasn't responding back to emails. The delight of having received the product safely quickly faded as I was facing the reality that this mind as well be water, b/c who knows, right? Other than an extreme bitter taste, there wasn't much to go on that this was real. As if going through the entire process of first deciding to take the risk to order, then careful prepping with getting the TOR browser, VPN provider, Proton Mail, Bitcoin, burner phone etc. and actually going through the motions of doing all these things, setting up accounts, writing emails, transferring money, learning how to even use BitCoin (what a pain in the ass that is), waiting impatiently for delivery while mulling over the risks… as if all of that wasn't stressful enough, now I had to figure out and jump through hurdles of sending a sample internationally to get it tested. So that is what I did.
View attachment 23451
Thus, a 2nd confirmation is in order; I am the person Ark mentioned was getting it tested and indeed after weeks of waiting I was happy to inform him that what we had was real N.
A sigh of relief…. that is UNTIL I noticed my caps suddenly started splitting and cracking open on the edge (where the side meets the top) despite being hidden away in a dark safe place, clearly adding to the degradation issue. Just one more unanticipated surprise courtesy of A.... *annoyed face* *eye roll*.
But, why am I complaining that none of this went according to how it should be? Beggars can't be choosers. After all, I have enough to peacefully CTB and that is all that matters. I am usually the one reading about other's good fortune wishing it was me. In this circumstance, I got lucky, I got my hands on the coveted "Liquid Luck" as I affectionately call it (this is a Harry Potter references for you non fans, hehe). I feel truly blessed in a way.
For those who have shared PMs/chat with me regularly, you know who you are. Thank you for your support, kindness, and openness in sharing invaluable information. I love you all.
Since I believe in a soul and an afterlife I cautiously look forward to the next step in my cosmic journey, while at the same time being sad to have to leave earlier than I would have wanted, and scared of the unknown. I will miss my family and my friends. I will miss Life dearly as I really loved it when it was livable.
I will be here tonight until I self ban before I drink my Liquid Luck.
"I hope you all find your way to peace no matter how." - Ark
Hey love I hope you find peace. Loving Harry Potter. I will miss you
"I've hit a wall,
I
My first ever reply hope that worked
Meant2Die,
I am crying because I miss someone I never met.
I am crying because someone I never met cared enough for people she never met to leave us with vital information, and a legacy of love.
I am crying because I am relieved that someone I never met no longer suffers intractable pain and sadness.
I am crying because I loved someone I never met as a fellow human being who takes with her a piece of my heart.
May never ending love and everlasting peace follow you. Amen.
I am crying because I miss someone I never met.
I am crying because someone I never met cared enough for people she never met to leave us with vital information, and a legacy of love.
I am crying because I am relieved that someone I never met no longer suffers intractable pain and sadness.
I am crying because I loved someone I never met as a fellow human being who takes with her a piece of my heart.
May never ending love and everlasting peace follow you. Amen.
Now I am crying because you guys are so non judgemental and beautiful. I so so wish you luck on your journey MeantToDie
I'm sorry you are leaving. I hope you find peace and rest at the end of your path.
3 days ago, we lost our friend @Meant2Die whose method to CTB was N. She delayed her date a good while despite terrible pain in order to have her product tested to relay the information to others. She worked with @Ark on this issue who also delayed his date in order to gather information from M2D and others and left us with a valuable thread about their findings and N.
I can't help but think of them and thank them today. RIP @Meant2Die and @Ark.
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/going-home-goodbye-thread.29126/page-3
We lost our friends @Meant2Die and @Ark just a few days ago as they used their chosen method of N. Both delayed their dates, remaining in pain, to research N issues and provided the information to the rest of us in a thread.
Today, I think of them and I thank them
RIP @Meant2Die and @Ark
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/getting-n-from-a-things-everyone-should-know.28438/
BlueWidow
Visionary
- Oct 6, 2019
- 2,179
They will both be greatly missed and their legacies will live on here. They will not be forgotten.
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