Friendship

[lainsito]

Sorry for the long ass text. Really having conflict with this lol

I met this girl 3 years ago. We shared the same interests, i was so happy with her, she was the person I was more comfortable with; Words could never express how much I really loved her, she was the only one I could trust, who would never judge me.
Our relationship is platonic, but if I am honest, I think I used to liked her in a romantic way. I've always had problems with romantic relationships, I never had a partner and never knew how "real love" is; I remember once she said that she would have me as a partner if I was boy.
We used to cuddle, hug each other and other stuff that made me feel loved, suddenly, one day, she just started ignoring me, being a lot more dry than she used to be, when I saw her she tried to avoid me, not answering my texts; There was no explanation behind that, it was instantaneously, and I was ashamed to ask her what was going on, i didn't wanted to loose her.
I was so depressed because I thought I would actually had a good relationship, and every night I was thinking what would have been the reason she started avoiding me, I spent nights crying.
I had to move cities, and it made me way more depressed that I already was. I still didn't wanted to leave her, even if she didn't wanted to have connection with me anymore.
Until this day, I feel this way, I don't want her to leave me. I sometimes watch her social media and see how she is with other people, and think that I could be there with her. I gotta say that now we talk more and I saw her in march, and our relationship improved, but it's not how it used to be.

Shit i sound so stupid

 

[mysticatedwine]

unresolved friendship conflicts are horrible, i've been there and i feel you... as hard as it might be for you to do this, your best bet will probably be to remove her from your social medias to not be exposed to anything that remind you of her anymore

i genuinely believe some friendship breakups are harder than some romantic ones

if you wish, you could try laying things out and asking her what went wrong. it's risky, it might harm you more than it helps. whatever it is i still think you should cut ties and try to find meaning elsewhere, it really sounds like the suffering you're getting out of this completely outweighs the benefits

it was hard for me. it took years, and i still havent completely succeeded. its a neverending work in progress. but ive found other people, ive found tenderness and ive found glimpses of meaning elsewhere. i wish the same upon you, you sound like you deserve it. i think you can find it too

you don't sound stupid to me

 

[lainsito]

unresolved friendship conflicts are horrible, i've been there and i feel you... as hard as it might be for you to do this, your best bet will probably be to remove her from your social medias to not be exposed to anything that remind you of her anymore

i genuinely believe some friendship breakups are harder than some romantic ones

if you wish, you could try laying things out and asking her what went wrong. it's risky, it might harm you more than it helps. whatever it is i still think you should cut ties and try to find meaning elsewhere, it really sounds like the suffering you're getting out of this completely outweighs the benefits

it was hard for me. it took years, and i still havent completely succeeded. its a neverending work in progress. but ive found other people, ive found tenderness and ive found glimpses of meaning elsewhere. i wish the same upon you, you sound like you deserve it. i think you can find it too

you don't sound stupid to me

Thank you for understanding, I will try the things you said because it is really draining me. Hope you get over the situation too, it's good that you already make a significant advance on that.